


A Tale of Dog and Monster: Gaster Shenanigans Edition

by Voice_of_Mischief



Series: A Tale of Dog and Monster [2]
Category: Undertale
Genre: F/M, M/M, Sequel, all the Gaster, also Gaster, basically more angst, except relationship edition, more Gaster, uhhhhh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-03-02
Packaged: 2018-05-11 06:26:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 56,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5616838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Voice_of_Mischief/pseuds/Voice_of_Mischief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been a long time since you've been this happy.</p><p>You're in a happy relationship. You have friends that care about you. Your dog is okay. You are okay. You are even close to the man who no longer exists.</p><p>Wait, what? </p><p>Yeah, that's what his son has been asking. Who also just so happens to be your boyfriend. How is one supposed to explain how they're friends with a being scattered across space time when they're not even sure themselves? Could this end up tearing you apart?</p><p>Could the truth be even worse then not knowing?</p><p> </p><p>(A sequel to A Tale of Dog and Monster; read that first otherwise you'll probably end up very lost.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What a Wonderful Life

"Sans."

"hmmm?"

"Tell me something."

"go for it."

"When I said you could get one, how did that translate to 'stores entire stock?'"

"are you sure you didn't mix those up by mistake?"

"Sans, put those back." You frowned at your skeletal boyfriend, who shot you a grin. 

"which ones?" He feigned ignorance. 

"Allllll of those. ...Except one." You frowned deeper, feigning anger as you crossed your arms.

"anything for you, babe." He shot you a wink when you got flustered. Without another word, he picked up the six or so jugs of ketchup he'd dropped into the cart when you weren't looking and walked off, hopefully to put them back.

You shook your head fondly after him, doing your best to ignore the odd looks the human customers were giving you. Ah, yes. Humans were still assholes. Even to other humans. The fading shadow of the cast that had been around your wrist and freshly healed stitches in your side were proof enough.

Let alone the dirty looks and hushed whispers that were being passed your way. 

You proceeded down the aisle, turning a corner and finding yourself beside an entire shelf lined with pasta, nearly bumping into your other skeleton in the process.

Papyrus was seemingly analyzing each and every shape and size of pasta, which would have been funny if he hadn't already been holding at least a dozen or so boxes.

"Um, Pap."

"AH, HUMAN! WHICH VARIETY OF PASTA DO YOU PREFER?" He beamed, making you hopelessly smile back.

"Uh, I don't know, but, um, maybe we should just get one box?"

His smile fell. "BUT HUMAN! I HAVE SO MANY I HAVE YET TO TRY!" He clutched at the boxes as if for dear life.

You sighed helplessly, then had an idea. "Well, uh, let me see what you've got." You picked one of the boxes from him, seemingly scrutinizing it. "Hm, no, this won't do." You put it back and picked up another, doing the same thing until you'd narrowed it down. 

You dusted off your hands, nodding decisively. "We'll just have to try those lesser-pastas later. Okay?"

Papyrus nodded excitedly, dropping the two remaining boxes into the shopping cart. 

Yes, shopping had certainly turned into a strange event of sorts as of recently. It was roughly seven- almost eight- months ago that you'd, quite literally, tripped into the skeletons' life. 

Thanks to your loyal (and also now cyborg-ish) canine Luka, you'd made friends out of the embarrassing deal. After that, it was an awkward progression of events: for a month or so things were fine, then you had an episode and were more or less forced into confessing your mental illness to Sans (and, oddly enough, he was very understanding of it all); a few months after that, after having made friends with the rest of their group, you and Luka both got into an accident. Luka lost a leg and you had lost hope, if only temporarily.

And while you were recovering, Sans pulled off some magic trickery and constructed a new leg for her. He revealed it at the Christmas party and when you'd expressed your gratitude, he'd kissed you.

Yeah. That happened.

You'd more or less confessed back to him and now you'd been dating for almost two months. He was everything you could ever had wanted in a partner and things had been going very smoothly between you, though you were almost afraid to admit for fear of something going completely and utterly wrong.

You may have been just the slightest bit paranoid, but, hey, you'd never been in a very successful relationship, let alone one this nice. What? You weren't a people person.

You preferred skeletons, thank you very much.

"Do you know anything else we need, Pap?"

He seemed to think for several moments before suddenly remembering something and dashing off, leaving you behind.

"... Yeah, okay." You chuckled out, pushing the cart slowly down the aisle as you racked your brain to see if you were forgetting something for yourself. You leaned over the bar of the cart, elbows resting evenly on it as you slouched forward.

You hardly jumped when Sans suddenly fell into step beside, looking utterly at ease despite the looks shot your way.

"i see you managed to keep Pap from buying every kind of pasta they have." 

"Oh my god, it took like fifteen minutes." You laughed, smiling when Papyrus came rushing back, dropping an armful of items into the cart. "Is that everything?"

Papyrus nodded vigorously, nearly tripping over his own feet. 

"Alright, let's check out then."

Humans were most definitely assholes. 

This cashier especially. She blatantly wrinkled her nose in distaste when Papyrus started putting things on the conveyer belt, which it morphed into a look of disgusted confusion when she saw you right behind him.

She didn't so much as say a greeting as she began to hurriedly scan and bag the items. As Sans beat you to the punch on paying for it all, you realized he either didn't realize or didn't care. Or he was just good at playing chill.

Probably that last one.

You snatched the receipt from her with barely restrained anger before flashing her a smile.

"And you said your name was...?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Um, I'm Em."

You nodded, looking at the receipt as though genuinely curious. "And there's a survey for customer service on here?"

She nodded, slowly realizing where you were going with this.

You flashed her a cold grin, eyebrows raised. "I'll be sure to leave exactly what I thought of Em's customer etiquette! Have a wonderful day!" With a wave, you grabbed the front of the cart, which Papyrus was now manning, and pulled it away.

You were angrily shoving the groceries into the trunk of the car when Sans caught your arm. 

"hey, hey. don't get mad over someone who doesn't deserve it."

You frowned and huffed, letting him take a bag from your hand. "Sorry. I kind of feel like she deserved more than that, to be honest."

He brushed his teeth to your cheek. "we can fight our own battles. let us decide whether those battles are worth fighting."

"Okay, but if someone is rude to Pap, I'm going to punch a bitch."

"you and me both." 

 

When you got home, Luka was very eager to stick her big fat nose into all the bags. 

"Luka, no. Luka. Luka. No. Specter, please." You pushed her away with a hip as you tired to put things away. 

As usual, Specter was trying his hardest to get in the way of everything while seemingly nonchalant. Oh yeah, you had a cat. Did I mention that?

Sans chuckled from behind the refrigerator door. "sounds like you've got your paws full."

"Is this a game to you?"

"in a cosmic sort of way, yes."

"You're the worst."

"ah, but you love me anyway."

You stopped, flustered. You frowned as hard as you could, narrowing your eyes at him before simply turning and walking out. 

"Okay, have fun putting everything away yourself. Goodbye." You nearly tripped as both Luka and Specter wound around you in circles. "Oh, I see how it is! I'm putting away groceries and you just have to get in the way, but he's doing it and you couldn't care less!"

A laugh came from the kitchen.


	2. Tender Old Wounds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one with the snake

You were already in your uniform, making coffee in the kitchen, when Sans decided to get up. You were like 99% sure it was because he was drawn to coffee like a moth to a flame. Nonetheless, he shuffled into the kitchen like a zombie as you were sprinkling cinnamon into the two mugs on the counter. 

"mornin', babe." He murmured out, coming up peer over your shoulder and humming in content when he saw a mug already waiting for him.

You laughed. "Good morning, sleepy bones. Yes, that's for you." He reached a hand around you and grabbed it before shuffling away to lean against the counter. He blinked at you over the top of his mug groggily. "I'm guessing you don't have work today, judging from your state." You chuckled out, raising an eyebrow to him.

He grinned. "nope."

"Gee, you must be the luckiest bag of bones around, huh?" You shook your head teasingly. He just took another sip at his coffee, watching as you finished what little coffee you'd had and put the mug in the sink. 

"why're you up so early?" It was his turn to raise an eyebrow, eyes following you as you headed for the living room.

"Oh, that's right, I forgot to tell you. Boss called a few days ago to ask me to come in regularly again."

He caught you in one arm as you went past, dragging you in him. He nuzzled his teeth against your cheek in a pseudo-kiss, almost looking like he was pouting. 

"why don't you just stay home? we could sit around and watch bad movies together." 

Ah, yes, he was pouting.

Also, damn, that was tempting. 

"Ah, but alas, my dearest Sans!" You swooned dramatically, causing him to quickly levitate the mug and instead use his spare hand to catch you. He stared down at you, a flustered blue spreading across his face. "My only true love..." You put a hand to your forehead, noticing the grin that spread across his face. "... is the pet shop."

With that, you quickly pulled yourself out of his arms and flounced into the living room. He only came trailing after you as you were putting your shoes on.

"that was low."

"Well, if it's any reconciliation, you're still my verte-bae." By this time, you were heading for the door.

"oh, really?" He seemed to suddenly appear in your way, reclined against the doorframe. You paused, eyeing him suspiciously. He was no stranger to being a sneaky, cheesy bastard (or a stubborn one) to get what he wanted.

"Um, yes?"

His grin broadened. "won't you give your verte-bae a kiss?"

Of course, you got flustered. 

Despite the fact that he never spared a moment to tease you ever since you ended up getting into a relationship, you were not used to the affection, which is little to say for giving affection. You were afraid and unsure of how to go about it, and taking it in baby steps still made you nervous.

"A-ah. Um. Sure." You blushed, looking away for a moment before giving him a quick kiss to the cheekbone. With that, you dodged out the door. "Alright, bye, I'll see you after work!"

Sans just chuckled as he waved you off.

If he was honest to himself, he found it cute how you got so flustered over the little things. And yet... He wished he knew a way to make you comfortable with the relationship. The nervousness was adorable, yes, but it made him feel like he was doing something wrong. Being too forward, maybe.

But then, he was no expert on relationships, either. 

Despite having lived through timeline after timeline, he'd never met anyone he could care enough about to settle down with. Knowing everything was eventually going to go back to zero kind of a damper on finding a partner. In one or two, he'd tried to hook up with Toriel, but that had always been short lived. Despite how she acted, Toriel naturally yearned for someone like Asgore.

It made him more then happy to find someone he could full heartedly care about; he wasn't sure if he could have forced himself to stop caring even if it was all just bound to reset. 

No more resets, though. What a relief.

His gaze shifted to Luka, who had come up to sit beside him. She looked back at him second later, her eyes bright and smart as ever. She opened her jaws in a smile, then leaned against him, tail hitting the floor in a very satisfying rhythm.

He went and took a seat on the sofa. She followed after him, plopping down just to the left of his legs.

"what's up, bud?" His phalanges were soon buried in the thick fur of her scruff. "you got any ideas?" 

She closed her mouth, giving him a very serious look. It still amazed him, the way she seemed to understand any question thrown her way. If only she had a voice to answer.

She rested her fluffy head in his lap, still looking at him intensely. 

He sighed. "sorry, bud, i'm not a telepath." She sneezed. "... i'll come up with something." She sneezed. "thanks."

 

"Hello, Stitches, how've you been? I missed you!" You cooed, pulling the snake up and out of the tank. He promptly flung himself over your wrist, finding a tight grip there. "Aw, thank you, friend!" He stretched up and lapped at the air in front of your nose, swaying back and forth. You laughed. "Sorry, buddy, I'm taken."

"oh, i see. i leave for five minutes and some punk's tryin' to flirt with my verte-bae?"

You jumped, then turned to see Sans standing there, hands stuck in his hoodie pockets. You laughed, holding up the python for him to see. "Oh, don't tell me you're threatened by silly snakes? You hear that, Stitches? My boyfriend doesn't like the way you're putting the moves on me."

Sans, though his cheekbones were pale blue, eyed the snake suspiciously. "... what is that?"

You raised an eyebrow, switching Stitches to your other hand. "This is Stitches. ...Well, that's what I'll call him till he gets adopted. He's our resident ball python. ... Don't tell me you've never seen a snake before?"

"we certainly didn't have long, leg-less tubes with heads in the underground." 

"Um, rude. Here, give me your hand."

He hesitated for several long moments. You laughed, then walked closer and leaned forward.

"Okay, then, I'll just do plan B." With that, you pulled at the rim of the hood away until you could slip Stitches inside. With that, you stepped back, smiling. "Don't worry, he won't hurt you. He just likes the warmest places best."

Sans had froze, eye sockets empty. "please get it off me."

"He's not an it! Geez, Sans." You shook your head with a laugh and turned back to the reptile display. "Our reptile expert is out for the day so I'm just doing a quick check up on everyone. Not my speciality, but it's easy to tell when anything is badly ill if you know the basics."

"uh-huh."

"I've always kind of liked snakes, in a weird way. My cousin used to own one, and sometimes he'd leave it with my brother when he went out of town." You lifted up one of the leopard geckos, watching as it aggressively wagged its tail. "Yes, I know, you don't like me. How's Stitches treating you over there?"

"please tell me it won't go down my spine."

You laughed, sliding open the turtle tank. "No, he won't. I put him in the hood for a reason. He's cold blooded, so he loves the warm little nooks and crannies. He'll hang there until someone pulls him out. You want me to take him out?"

"yes. very much so." Sans still hadn't moved from where you'd left him. You laughed, sticking a hand into the lip of the hoodie and pulling out the now very active python. 

"Look, he likes you." You giggled as he stretched out his neck toward Sans, flicking his tongue out. Sans quickly stepped back.

"please tell me you don't want to adopt that too."

You laughed. "Nope. Pythons are pretty popular, so we've nothing to fear about him not finding him a home. He's just a little bigger than the others; people like the little ones better and tend to pick them out first." You lowered the snake into the glass tank, watching as he curiously slithered around as if he'd never been there before.

"why would anyone want something like that?"

"Rude! Be nice, they can hear you." 

He snorted, but grinned anyway. "so long as i don't have to handle it."

You shook your head. "Did you really call him a tube with a head?"

"that's what he looks like."

You huffed. "What are you even doing here? I would've thought you'd be spending important time at home, relaxing with Spec."

"i've always got time for my verte-bae." He shot a wink your way and for once, you weren't too flustered. You just chuckled. 

"Yeah, well, I can't be caught goofing off with customers, let alone my boyfriend, for too long or I'll get fired." You gave him a pointed look.

"goofing off? no, you were obviously showing me the wonders of... snakes." 

"Uh-huh. Listen, my lunch break is in ten minutes, I can goof off with you then?"

He flashed you a smile. "any time, verte-bae, is time well spent if i can spend it with you."

You laughed, though blushed. "Geez, when did you turn so sappy?"

"i don't recall ever turning into a tree."

"Just wait for me outside!" You couldn't help but laugh despite yourself, turning pointedly to the fish tanks.

His hand found yours in a gentle squeeze before he headed off, calling, "see you in a few," over his shoulder.

You smiled to yourself as you tended to the fish you'd missed seeing every day, but a prickle of doubt crawled up your spine. Couple relationships as nice as this really exist for very long? 

No one seemed to think so, not even in fairy tales.

 

"you never told me you had a brother."

The nonchalant question caught you off guard. You'd joined Sans outside just as you'd said you would and you'd started for his- your- house and started making small talk.

"Oh. Didn't I?"

"if you did, i don't remember it."

"Oh. Well, you know. It just... never came up." You shrugged as casually as you could.

"not a big deal. i'd like to meet 'im sometime." 

You focused on the sidewalk ahead of you. "Some time." You said it as dismissively as you could. It seemed to work; he dropped it. 

As you reached the house, you kept walking. "I'll be there in a sec; I want to check on the flowers." He nodded as you headed briskly for your yet-to-be-sold former home. It was dark and empty, smelling of dust, when you stepped inside. You'd cut off the electricity and water soon after deciding you'd stay with the skeletons and it left the place feeling very still.

In a way, it felt dead.

There were random, half-packed boxes strewn around, stuff you'd yet to find a place for and stuff you didn't want to move yet. You paused beside one, full of tiny, framed photographs. Most of them were gifts from your father. On top was one of Dusty and Tumble, caught in ray of sunshine, laying side by side.

You walked on.

Everything was cold and dead looking as you walked the path through the woods. Very quiet. Even the forget-me-nots were all skeletons of what used to be. Ready to rebuild themselves in the spring. 

You cleared the dead leaves away with a foot. 

Sans was waiting in the kitchen when you got back. He looked up with a smile when you entered.

"flowers okay?" 

"Yes. Thanks for... being so supportive of all my weird coping tactics." You looked away, guilt chewing at the inside of your gut as you opened the fridge.

"don't worry about it. we've all got our ways."

"What's yours?"

"... what?"

When you looked up again, he was staring at you oddly. You quickly realized the mistake and turned back to the fridge, trying to come up with a way to cover it up.

"A-ah, you mentioned 'the old man' once, and from the way you said it, it sounded like he was..." You shut your mouth, nervously shoving things aside on the shelves of the fridge. "I-I'm sorry."

"nah. don't be." But he didn't say any more about it. 

Gaster was, to put it simply, a tender spot for him, it seemed. 

You'd been seeing Gaster often in your dreams ever since the incident and could even say he was like a fatherly friend. You, at first, had avoided telling anyone about it in case it was all in your head, but when you realized he was close to Sans- perhaps even related to him- you hid it for an all new reason.

How would he take it? Would he be angry that Gaster was 'visiting' you rather than him? Would he be upset? 

Would he believe it at all?

You quickly grabbed something to eat and practically ran out the door. Sans didn't insist on you giving him a goodbye kiss this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had a hard time writing this one, so sorry if it feels forced. I have no idea how I'm going to go about kickstarting the 'plot' of this one, so until I do it'll probably just be fluffy relationship things.
> 
> Something in particular you want to see? Leave it in the comments!


	3. Nightmare

"... but, yes, I've decided to move in with them." You sighed out, slightly embarrassed, to your ethereal friend, Gaster. He clapped happily, picking up his small whiteboard. 

':D !!!'

You chuckled. "Yeah, I thought that'd make you happy. How've you been? It feels like it's been a while."

He just shrugged his shoulders, raising his hands in a 'same as always' motion. 

"I'm sorry. I should have come to see you more often."

He shook his head, gently patting your hand.

"Actually, Gaster, I've been meaning to ask for a while..."

He made a questioning sound you vaguely identified as a 'Yes?'

"What... is this place?"

He paused, then silently picked up his white board.

'the void. limbo.'

"Oh. So you're...?"

He just looked at you silently.

"But... How am I able to come here?"

He smiled sadly, knowingly.

"Does it... have something to do with my soul? What /happened/ to my soul? I mean, it's like I was supposed to just... die. But... I didn't?"

He smiled softly, then drew a shape in the air. It filled in to be an indigo, childlike heart- a representation of your soul. He put his hands to either side of it and pulled out, as if he was pulling it apart. It cracked from the inside, then started to separate into different segments. Then he pushed his hands back together, like he was pushing it back together. The heart came together again, something white and opaque seemingly acting like glue to fill in the gaps. 

You looked at it, then at him. "What's that supposed to mean?" 

He lowered a hand to pick up his board,

Then you woke up.

A cold ghost of air was sliding up your back, signaling that the covers had been pulled back. The bed shifted with weight and something cold slid under the blanket beside you. You stifled a jump, sitting halfway up and blinking to adjust to the dark.

"sorry. didn't mean to wake you." 

It was Sans. He'd froze, one leg on the bed. His voice was quiet, but wavered as if he'd been crying. His left eye illuminated some of the surroundings, revealing that he seemed to have been sweating and looked disheveled. Immediately, you realized something was wrong.

"It's okay, it's okay. Come on in. What's the matter?" 

You scooted over to make room, and, briefly hesitating, Sans quickly crawled up beside you and flung his arms around you, nuzzling into your neck. You froze briefly, face heating up, but eventually put your arms around him and gently rubbed his back.

"... Nightmare?"

"yes."

You hummed quietly, bringing a hand up to ghost your fingers over the back of his skull. Specter, having sensed the commotion from wherever he was in the house, came up and sat at the end of the bed. 

"... Do you want to talk about it?"

"not really."

"Okay."

You ran a hand gently over the backs of his ribs, shoulder blades, then down his spine. You stayed like for a long time. At one point, you glanced over the clock to see it was some time around 3:00. It was a good thing you didn't have work in the morning.

Eventually, he relaxed and his grip on you loosened. You stayed for another minute or so, then began to ease out of his arms. Immediately, his grip on you tightened and he pulled away slightly to look at you. He almost looked afraid to let you go.

"No, no, it's okay. I'm just going to get some water, okay? I'll be right back." You soothed. He hesitated, then let you go. You gave his hand a squeeze, then stood and walked quietly into the hall. 

As you were passing through the living room, a shadow materialized beside you. You blinked, flinching slightly, then smiled as you recognized the hazy face.

"Hi, Gaster." You whispered quietly. He tilted his ghostly head to the side. "Sans had a nightmare." He seemed to slouch, but followed you into the kitchen. "It's okay, I think he just needs a glass of water." He nodded, though he still looked sad. You patted him the best you could. "He'll be okay." 

He disappeared as you went back down the hall, glass of water in hand. When you pushed the door open, you were surprised to see Sans still sitting up, Specter nuzzling him affectionately. You smiled, then gently pushed the door almost closed.

"Hey." You whispered, sitting beside him. He looked up groggily, Specter not pleased with the lack of attention. He 'mrrraow'd' softly, pawing at Sans. "I brought you some water."

He nodded, drinking it carefully, then pulled you down into the blankets beside him. You took him into your arms instinctively, his forehead against your collarbone. You reached down and pulled the blanket over him as Specter found a comfortable to nap beside you. With that, you relaxed beside him, feeling very comfortable, despite the blush crawling across your cheeks. 

"thank you." He was mumbling into your shirt now.

"Don't thank me. I'm glad to help you." You pressed a light kiss to the top of his head.

"... goodnight. 'love you."

"Goodnight, bone boy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It feels like it's been a while,, probably not but it feels like it lmao,,
> 
> I'm having some major writers block,, So have some awkward fluff.


	4. Skeletons don't get cut on broken glass

Waking the next morning was... something. Certainly something. 

Also really embarrassing.

In a way, it reminded you of a certain previous time Sans had needed someone to lean on. He was wound around you quite thoroughly, keeping a snug grip on your waist as if to make sure you didn't slip away while his head rested on your midsection. The only difference was that it was a tad less flustering.

You ran a hand gently over the top of his skull, smiling when he grumbled and snuggled closer to you. You ran a thumb over the edge of his teeth, along the edge of his jaw bone, to just beneath his eye curiously. You'd always sort of wanted to explore how he worked- you knew he wasn't an actual skeleton, just a monster that looked like one- but that felt a little too much like... something else. Something too intimate. Too much, too soon, for your liking.

He made a face, then let out a quick puff of air. You snickered, pulling yourself half upright. 

"Wakey, wakey, vertebae. It's morning." 

He made another face and muttered something, nuzzling you. You flushed and squirmed, suddenly embarrassed. You tried to push yourself up, which was kind of hard considering you had a rather big boned skeleton practically strapped to you.

"Sans, really. I have to get up."

He mumbled something like that sounded "why?"

"Because... It's, like, the usual time I do?"

Was he... trying to lean into you and force you into lying down again? "but you don't have work." 

"No, but I do have plans. Besides, I already slept in by an hour."

"you could stand to sleep for a few more." He inched his way up, now resting his head on your shoulder as you fell back. 

"... You're heavy."

"hmmm." 

Was he falling asleep again?

"Sans."

"mm."

"Sans."

"..."

"Sans!" You were whining now.

Did he just snicker?

"Sansy." You groaned out, throwing your head into your pillow in exasperation. He shifted and his breath ghosted over your neck. You couldn't suppress a jitter at the sensation. He paused, then did it again. You shivered openly and he chuckled agains your skin, making you squirm. "Sa-ns!" You wiggled, trying to push him away. 

He laughed, then let go and sat up groggily. You followed, leaning against the headboard. 

"Don't do that! It gives me jitters."

"duly noted." He wiggled his eyebrows at you, though he still looked half asleep. You laughed, but flushed anyway.

"So." You ran a hand through your hair. "Did you sleep okay?"

He paused, and looked away. "yeah. thanks for that. sorry, for, uh... intruding on your sleep." A look akin to guilt came across his features.

"Hey, hey. It's okay. If I can depend on you, you can more then depend on me. Okay? I just want you to be as happy and safe as I am when I'm around you guys." You smiled meekly, cheeks crawling with heat. 

A soft look replaced his previous tense one and he crawled forward to sit in your lap, knees on either side of your hips (making you far more then embarrassed). He leaned on you, looping his arms around your waist loosely as he rested his head on your shoulder. You laughed nervously and put your arms around him, one hand gently rubbing the back of his head.

He let out a long breath, relaxing into the embrace. "... what did i ever do to deserve this?" 

You gave him a quick peck to the side of his jaw. "What did /I/ ever do to deserve this? All of you. You especially." Luka sneezed loudly from where she'd put her head on the side of the bed. "And you." You laughed to her. 

It was just about then that your door slammed open. You jumped and Sans merely lifted his head to look up. You immediately froze like a deer in headlights, an intense blush crawling up your neck. Luka, looking up, 'wuff'd' softly, thumping her tail.

Papyrus looked on for a moment, then raised his hands and backed away. 

"Sans, I think we may have just traumatized your brother."

"oops."

"Get off, I need to explain to him- Sans!" You yelped, quickly grabbing whatever was closest, which just so happened to be Sans, as he scooped you up and stood. With that, he headed for the living room. If anymore blood rushed to your face, you might faint.

"S-Sans! I need to get dressed! I need to get ready for the day!" 

A lame excuse, but you panicked.

He chuckled, but gently lowered you to the ground. You wobbled, then steadied. 

"Thank you." You sighed in relief. "Now, go, I have to get dressed."

"what's the occasion?" He paused, a hand on the doorframe. 

"There's a few boxes I want to get from my place today."

"right." He nodded, then shot you a wink as he headed to the kitchen. "don't take too long, vertebae." You shook your head, trying to force down your blush, as you closed the door.

 

You were humming to yourself, lifting an old, worn book from the box on your bed, when you heard a crash followed by a startled yelp from Papyrus. You quickly dropped the book and sped down the hall, through the living room and into the kitchen.

Papyrus was looking down at shards of what had once been a mug in a very surprised, dejected way, as if wondering why the mug had decided to break. 

"Are you okay, Papyrus?"

He looked up as he bent down to scoop up the shards scattered across the floor. "AH, HUMAN! I APOLOGIZE, I WAS IN A HURRY TO PUT THINGS AWAY AND WAS CARELESS! IT WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN!" 

You had stooped beside him, carefully picking up what was left of the mug, when you stopped and stared at it in much the same way he had just moments before. "... Oh."

"HUMAN? I APOLOGIZE FOR DROPPING THE MUG... I HOPE YOU DO NOT HATE ME FOR MY MOST CARELESS MISTAKE." 

You shook yourself. "No, no. It's, it's okay, Papyrus. It's okay." You scooped up the little bits and pieces, nicking yourself by mistake, and dropped them into a plastic bag. "Here, put them in here. This way they rip up the trash bag." Papyrus nodded, looking concerned, but complied. You set the bag on the counter beside the box of your sentimental dish ware and stood, dusting off your hands. "It's okay, Papyrus. We all make mistakes." You gave him a gentle smile.

He returned it, seemingly relieved you weren't upset. You helped him up, then turned into the living room. You were lacing up your shoes when Sans appeared beside you.

"what happened? i was a bit wrapped up..." He shot a look to a certain fluffy cat wound around his neck, kneading his jacket. You smiled softly at the duo, glad Specter had found Sans worthy of his affections.

"Papyrus accidentally dropped a mug, that's all. I'm going to grab one last box from my house, okay?" Something about the way you spoke, or maybe your expression, gave you away. He looked at you almost worriedly. "It's okay. It's just a mug." You waved him off.

He nodded hesitantly, then let you out the door. 

It was very cold out. Maybe, for once, you'd get snow. That would be nice. 

The house was cold and forlorn as you stepped inside, spirals of dust dancing in the shafts of light drifting inside. Your footsteps were loud as you trailed through the living room, boxes half packed littering every surface. You stopped in front of the couch and pulled one closer to you.

Inside were photographs. You and Molly, Dusty and Tumble, Molly and Tumble, your father, a few of your mother, one of your brother... Ah, there. A picture of a very confused and seemingly distressed kitten, jaws opening in a questioning meow as it propped its feet up on the edge of a mug it barely fit into. You smiled at it, took a deep breath, then tucked it deep into the mess of photos and picked up the box, folding the flaps closed.

With that, you headed for the home of your best friends. 

When you stepped inside, you didn't immediately see Papyrus or Sans, but clattering from the kitchen told you where the younger brother was. You discovered where Sans was most likely hiding out as you went down the hallway to your room- his door was closed, but sound came from inside.

You put the box on your bed, lifted out a few pictures you liked best and propped them up on your new bookshelf. Then, you pushed the box under the bed. Some things are best kept out of sight.

"HUMAN? HAVE YOU RETURNED? LUNCH IS READY!"

"Coming, Papyrus."

 

When you went back into your room later to continue organizing your books, you found a surprise waiting for you on your bed.

Sitting on your bed, wrapped in a simple ribbon, was a very familiar mug. It was by no means perfect, and would have probably leaked had it been filled, but it looked to have been very carefully put together again. A small card beside it had nothing but a simple, blue heart on it.

You smiled, then picked up the mug and put it gently on the shelf. It took several moments for you to compose yourself, during which time Specter came up. You scooped him up into your arms, making him blink in surprise before he started purring loudly, nuzzling his fuzzy head against your chin. 

Maybe things weren't exactly as they used to be, but they were just as good. Maybe... 

Your hazy gaze drifted to the mug sitting on your bookshelf beside it's matching photograph.

Maybe even better.


	5. Overwhelming

"HUMAN, YOU DID NOT INFORM US THERE WAS SNOW ABOVE GROUND?!" Papyrus slammed your door open, shouting at the top of his lungs, at what you thought was far too early an hour. You scrunched up your face in protest, but sat up any way.

"'Course there's snow above ground. Where else would it be?" You muttered out, still half asleep.

"WHY WAS I NOT TOLD ABOUT THIS?! HURRY, HUMAN, GET DRESSED AND JOIN ME OUTSIDE!" With that, Papyrus rushed back out, crashing into the wall briefly before taking off down the hall. 

With a sigh, you contemplated the blankets for far longer then you should have before you stood. You shoved your feet into your slippers- a gift from Alphys- and shuffled into the living room. Papyrus was already galloping outside with Luka close behind, both seemingly ecstatic at the snow frosting the ground outside.

You huffed out a light chuckle before turning to the kitchen. It seemed Papyrus had not been loud enough to wake Sans, or, if he had, he had wisely decided to stay in bed. You turned on the coffee maker, then grabbed a few mugs and filled one with milk and put it into the microwave. You didn't know if skeletons could even feel the cold, but it only made sense that they would like hot chocolate despite.

Specter, the little brat that he was, decided to jump up on the counter just beside your elbow. You looked at him in surprise, then narrowed your eyes at him.

"Well, hello there, mister 'I think I own the place.'"

"Mrrrrp!" He pattered the counter lightly with his tiny front paws, a purr rumbling deep in his throat as he sat down. You sighed, then reached up to ruffle the fur of his ears. 

"Yeah, okay, but just this once."

"Mrrow!"

He watched you as you finished up the two mugs of coffee and one mug of hot cocoa, giving his input whenever you made eye contact with him. He eventually settled into a loaf, legs tucked under him and tail curled up, and almost dozed off as you started muffins.

Papyrus and Luka came back in just as you were pulling the muffin pan out of the oven. Luka was walking a bit oddly, and upon inspection, her metal leg was cold enough that it was locking up slightly. Papyrus seemed anxious about it, even as you wrapped a blanket around her.

"ARE YOU CERTAIN SHE WILL BE OKAY?"

"Of course, Paps." Though you weren't, Luka herself didn't seem to uncomfortable. In fact, she seemed very pleased as she settled on the couch, bundled up in a cocoon of fuzzy blankets. "Now. Would you like a muffin and some cocoa?"

"OF COURSE!! THANK YOU, HUMAN!!" 

Sans shuffled into the kitchen just as Papyrus was biting into a second muffin quite cheerfully. He seemed to gravitate to his waiting coffee immediately, taking a sip with a pleased hum. 

"Morning, sleepy bones."

"morning, babe."

You flushed and looked away. He either didn't notice or didn't say anything. 

"so, Paps. looks like you've already been out in the snow."

"OF COURSE! SNOW WAITS FOR NO SKELETON! NOW, HURRY, HUMAN, AND JOIN ME IN THE MAKING OF SNOWMEN!" With that, the energetic skeleton bounced out the door with a happy grin on his face.

You dusted off your hands and headed for the coat rack, grabbing a pair of mitts on the way. 

"By the way, Luka's leg was locking up due to the cold. I doubt it's anything bad, but, uh..." You glanced in her direction, a worm of worry curling in your gut.

"i'll check on it."

"Thank you, Sans."

"anything for you and your fur balls."

"Rude." With that, you laughed and opened the back door, stepping out into the soft, crunching snow. It was obvious it wouldn't last very long, a day, at the most, but it was nice while it lasted.

Papyrus was attempting to get enough together to make a snowman. You chuckled at the sight, but soon got into the mess to help him to the best of your ability. It was funny, the last time it had truly snowed like this, your brother had challenged you to a snowball fight and you had ended up getting smothered by a tree branches' worth of snow. While he most certainly had not been the best, that had been one of the better times.

You were lost in thought for several moments, so when you looked up, you were surprised to see Sans standing beside you in his usual hoodie. 

"having fun, sweetheart?" 

You flustered, turning the little ball of snow in your hands over a few times. "Y-yes. Lots of fun." You stepped away slightly, then flopped into the snow and started making a snow angel. Sans watched in amusement, but said nothing more. 

Papyrus started sneezing by the time the hour mark ticked past, and that soon evolved in sniffles and short coughs and more sneezing. He insisted on staying in the snow for a bit longer, finally agreeing to come inside some time in the middle of the afternoon.

Soon, a headache settled it and he was left lying on the couch to try and get it to fade away. You went to the kitchen to make him another mug of hot cocoa, where you caught Sans going through a cabinet as if searching for something.

"Do monsters get sick like humans do?"

"i'm no expert on how humans work, but, kind of. it seems to me that, having spent so long without snow, his magic wasn't prepared to spend hours rolling around in it. if this had happened just after we came above ground, we would have no side affects at all, but since it's been so long..." He shrugged, then frowned down into the drawer.

"Would painkillers work for you guys, or...?" You felt kind of helpless. You glanced out the window, where the sun was setting early behind the creamy and peach tinted clouds. The snow left behind was washed in yellow and pink.

"not as well as we'd like. you stay here with Paps, i'll make a quick trip to the store and grab something that should work wonders for him." 

"... Alright. Be careful. Drivers around here aren't practiced in driving on snow."

He pressed his teeth to your cheek, then made for the door. "be back in a few."

Soon you were sitting on the couch in the warm colors coming from the outside, Papyrus' head cradled in your lap. He looked surprisingly tired.

"Have a good time, Pap?"

"Most certainly!" He was oddly quieter then his usual self, but then, he seemed almost asleep. "Despite how I feel now."

"Don't worry, Sans is going to the store to get you something to help you feel better." You smiled softly to yourself. "You're lucky to have an older brother like him."

"Yes, he is most certainly very great, if somewhat lazy." Papyrus huffed to himself slightly, making you chuckle. He groggily opened his eyes to peer up at you. "I am sorry for you, human. You will never know the wonders of having a brother."

Your smile faltered and you looked away for a second. "Actually, um... I do. Have an older brother."

"Oh? And we haven't met him?! I don't recall you ever mentioning him either."

Your smile dropped completely and you looked away. "Not... Not all siblings get along as well as you and Sans do, Papyrus." Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a dense clump of shadows shift. You felt his eyes on you and refused to look up. You knew what he wanted, but you didn't want to talk about it.

For a few moments, it was quiet. 

"Human, I-"

There was a sound from the front door, which caused Luka to woof quietly. Sans was back.

You ran a hand over Papyrus' cheek. "Paps, please don't mention what I said to your brother." He looked at you confusedly. "Please."

"... O-okay, human, but I don't-"

"i've got exactly what we need." Sans came in, pulling something out a plastic bag. When he glanced up, if he noticed your slightly panicked expression, he didn't say anything. "c'mon, Paps. you look bone tired. let's get you to bed." 

Papyrus groaned, but shuffled to his feet and went down the hall to his room. Sans followed him, and, while he was busy giving Papyrus whatever would make him better, you stood and went to the kitchen to make hot cocoa for Sans and yourself.

Halfway through the process, you were aware of someone wandering into the kitchen. Before you could turn to see if it was Luka or not, arms looped around your waist and pulled you into a wide, familiar ribcage. 

You blushed, but chuckled and relaxed into the embrace. "How's Papyrus?" 

"he'll be fine in the morning."

You let out a relieved sigh. "Good. I was worried." 

He chuckled against your neck, forcing you to suppress a shiver. "you worry too much."

"I worry for good reason." With that, you pulled out of his grasp and turned, holding out one of the mugs. "Here."

"thanks, babe." He took it gently, giving a soft smile.

"Anything for my vertebae?" 

You settled on the couch, shoulder to shoulder, the TV playing softly in the background. It was warm inside, with Luka now back to normal and curled up at your feet, Specter probably curled up with Papyrus to keep him company. It was very companionable, just sitting there with Sans, his shoulder lightly touching yours.

After a while, he chuckled, making you look over. He was looking at you amusedly, making heat crawl across your cheeks. 

"... What?"

He grinned wider, pointing to his cheek. "you've got a little something there."

You blushed further, rubbing at your cheek tentatively. When you looked at him again, he shook his head and pointed again. You tried again, to which he chuckled, shaking his head.

"here."

He surprised you by lifting a hand to your chin, holding it there while he out his mug down before the tip of his thumb swiped gently under your lip. You could only sit there, frozen, as his eyes drifted up to yours as he brought his thumb up to his mouth.

You're not sure what you were expecting, but if any more blood rushed to your face, you might just die.

A blue, slightly translucent tongue appeared from between his teeth and he ran his thumb over it. The entire time, he kept his gaze tracked on yours.

You quickly looked away, attempting to save some of your dignity. He chuckled at your reaction, though you could see the ghost of a blush across his own face. 

"what's the matter? cat got your tongue?"

You couldn't think of anything to say. You put your mug down and covered your cheeks with your hands. 

"aw, come on, i was just teasing." One of his hands found yours and pulled you over to look at him. After a second, he pulled your hands away and instead cupped your cheek to pull you into a kiss. 

It was still something you weren't quite used to, kissing someone with no lips to kiss, but you tried to reciprocate the best you could. One of your hands found the edge of his hoodie and he pulled you closer. You were surprised when his tongue ghosted across your lips, but, after a moment of hesitation, you opened your mouth to let it enter. It slipped gently inside, rubbed against your own tongue carefully for a moment, then explored your mouth and all the nooks and crannies it could reach. 

At some point, he slid you beneath him, your shoulders on the armrest of the couch. His hands ghosted over your cheeks, then tangled in your hair as you pulled away slightly to breath. His teeth pressed lovingly against your jaw, then slid back up to your lips as his hands traced slowly down your neck, then lower to your waist. 

You wondered if he could hear your heartbeat as well as you could.

After a momentary pause, his hands slid cautiously up your sides, beneath your shirt. It was when the tips of his phalanges ghosted over the scar left by the stitches the doctors had put in many weeks before that you suddenly jolted away, the soft flesh of your midsection caving in to shy away on instinct. 

You pulled away from him, and when he went to head for your neck again, you whispered out his name, which certainly got his attention. He pulled back enough to look at you, your hands braced against his shoulders. Apparently, your expression said enough, as he quickly pulled away, hands retracting back from underneath your shirt. 

He helped you sit up, looking very, very blue. 

"sorry. got a little carried away there." 

It felt like every part of your body was screaming in panic and a vague sense of fear. Your hands found your upper arms and you curled in on yourself slightly. You couldn't meet his gaze. There was a long silence.

"i'm sorry. i shouldn't have gone so far."

"I-it's... It's alright." Luka had long since sat up, and now she rested her head down gently on your knee, looking at you through soft eyes. You smiled shakily down at her. For a few moments, there was a long quiet. Then you stood, grabbing your mug and heading for the kitchen. 

When you turned from the sink, Sans was just entering behind you. The look on his face was nothing short of guilt. You slid over to make him room as he rinsed out his mug, but couldn't stop the slight flinch when he reached out to pull you into a hug. He stopped and retracted his hands. 

"I'm... I'm sorry. I'll just... go to bed. Goodnight, Sans." You took his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, which he returned, looking like he didn't know what to say.

"goodnight, sweetheart."

As you slept, you actively fought away from drifting into Gaster's void. You knew he would ask about what you were talking about, about your brother, about how things were going with Sans, and you knew you really, really didn't want to talk about it. 

And for the first night in ages, you had nightmares.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And, thus, the plot begins to emerge.
> 
> No smut for you.


	6. Overwhelmed

The air was very still, but it crackled at the edges as if preparing for something. Your heart was hammering against your chest. When you took a deep breath to calm yourself, the smell of iron hit you like a truck.

"it's a beautiful day outside."

The familiar voice was oddly hollow and chilled at the edges. Up ahead, a silhouette was just barely outlined against the golden expanse of the hallway. 

"birds are singing... flowers are blooming..."

It turned away slightly to look out one of the windows to your left. 

"on days like these, people like you..."

It turned back to you, chuckling cruelly. People like you...? It raised a hand, pointing to something behind you. You turned to look over your shoulder, and your blood ran cold.

Strewn out almost peacefully behind you, crumpled as if sleeping, was everyone you had ever cared about. Luka, looking as if her mechanical leg had been wrenched out; Specter, looking as though he'd been cut through; Dusty, Tumble, Molly, Undyne, Papyrus, Alphys, your boss. Everyone.

Even your brother. He was the only one standing, slouched slightly to one side. He gave a small, weak grin, shrugging as if it was no big deal, then crumbled like a deck of cards. 

You wanted to turn around and run to them, to see if you could help them, to see if they were still even alive, but it was as if your feet were made of lead.

"should be burning in hell."

You turned back, horror curdling in your veins. Sans was illuminated by the pale light now, smiling like you'd never seen before. He raised a hand, and the air tensed as his left eye ignited with a vengeance. 

Something drew your attention to the windows to your left. A hunched shadow was raising a fist to bang against the glass, over and over, seeming desperate. 

The next instant, white, hot light engulfed the corridor. 

 

You tumbled from the bed, Specter leaping to his feet as you thumped to the floor. You stared down at the floor between your hands, feeling a chill creeping up your back that wasn't entirely the morning's fault. It was still dark, but the hazy hints of dawn made everything glow eerily.

Your soul was floating vacantly in front of you, casting everything in a faint indigo light. You sat up and took it in your hands, trying to calm their shaking. You tried to focus on your soul for a moment, then blinked in confusion. 

Where it had once looked very ready to break, something thick and white seemed to be gradually filling in the lines. 

You shook your head, allowing it to slide back into your chest just as the door to your bedroom was pushed somewhat roughly open. You looked up as both Luka and Sans filled the doorway, Luka quickly coming up to smother your face in messy dog kisses, Sans hanging back. His left eye illuminated the room. It sent chills up your spine and you instinctively grabbed at Luka.

"i heard a crash. are you okay?" He stepped forward as you pulled yourself back onto the bed.

You took a deep breath. Should you tell him? The details of the dream were escaping you, the only things remaining being blood, your brother, your friends, Sans, someone panicking... Whatever happened, it wasn't important.

"Yes. Yes, I'm okay. I just... rolled off the bed by mistake."

His expression softened and he sat carefully beside you. You scooted over to make room, putting a few inches between you; you couldn't even meet his gaze. You were still shaken up, both from the dream and the night before. For a while there was silence.

"... i... do you want to talk about anything?"

"No, no. I-I'm okay." 

Luka put her shaggy brown head on your knee. You quickly grabbed at the ruffles of fur beneath her ears, trying to ground yourself. Your nearly jumped out of your skin when Sans' fingers ghosted over your arm. He quickly pulled away, cringing. 

"are you sure you're okay? listen, sweetheart... i'm sorry about last night."

"It's fine. I'm fine. Just shaken up from falling off the bed." 

He could see right through your lies, of course. He just... didn't know what to do. He knew he'd fucked up and that he should have taken it slowly. But what was the best way to go about this? Give you space, or try to comfort you? Talk about it, or just let it pass? At the moment, he wanted nothing more then to cradle you in his arm, but it was obvious you were still uneasy. 

"alright, sweetheart. i'll go... make some coffee." 

Sans stood and left the room quietly, shutting the door behind him. Specter came up to sniff at you curiously as you rolled in self loathing for several minutes before standing and getting ready to go to work.

 

The next few days were... torture. You didn't know what to do with yourself. Every time someone got too close, your skin would crawl uncomfortably. You felt very... violated, in a way. 

Even if you shouldn't have. 

Sans was your boyfriend. You should have trusted him. You should have been comfortable with him. But, when it came to your body... you were so un-comfortable with it to begin with, but when people started looking at you or touching you, it made you all the more sensitive to it. 

But this was /Sans/! He obviously trusted you, but you couldn't even do this one thing for him. You knew about what people said, about how guys naturally craved another body and wouldn't be satisfied with a relationship without it. And that was what scared you. You had always felt inadequate, even in friendship, this was worse, in a way. 

For one reason or another, this also kept you from wanting to see Gaster, so you actively kept away from dreams about the void, nightmares taking their place.

It was this and the self loathing that crawled under your skin that just made you all the more paranoid for a while.

It was slowly beginning to ebb as the week mark ticked past. You and Sans were enjoying the quiet evening after a day of work, both sitting on the couch, but on opposite ends. You knew it bothered him, but it bothered you, too. Luckily, Luka took up the awkwardly large gap between, making it less obvious you were being a tad distant. 

Sans was ticking away at his phone, not paying much attention as you ran your fingers through the fur of Luka's soft forehead. She groaned and stretched comfortably, and you watched the toes of the mechanical leg twitch in response. 

Sans had done so much for you, but you... You hadn't done much for him.

"hey, babe."

You lurched out of your thoughts, looking up at your lover as his gaze found yours. "Yeah?"

"Undyne was wondering if we wanted to join her and Alphys for a double date tomorrow night. Grillby got his place opened up, and she wants to celebrate."

"What about Papyrus?"

"he doesn't care for the food." Sans snickered slightly, sparing a glance to the kitchen, where Papyrus was trying his skeletal hands at lasagna. 

"Well... Sure, okay, I'm... I'm game." You shrugged. Maybe this was your chance to try and mend the slight rip in you and Sans' relationship. 

Sans smiled at you lazily, though his gaze gave him away. "alright. don't worry about dressing nice, Grillby's is a casual place."

 

You and Sans walked to Undyne's side by side. It was still a tad chilly out, but your large hoodie did well to fend off the nipping frost. Sans was dressed in his usual attire, and he looked very comfortable, walking along beside you with his eyes closed as if he knew the way by heart.

You kept your hands tucked into your pockets, away from the cold, just as Sans did. If this had happened just a little while before, you would have been hand in hand despite the chill. Your smile faltered slightly and you hunched your shoulders a bit.

"cold, sweetheart?"

You jumped slightly, glancing at Sans. He had cracked an eye open to look at you. "No, no, I'm fine. Just thinking." His expression fell slightly and he looked ready to say something, but just then you blurted out. "Oh, look, we're here! Hi, Undyne!"

You jogged up to the blue fish monster, giving her a short squeeze before giving one to the short yellow lizard beside her. Undyne's gaze flickered between you and Sans.

"Something going on between you guys?"

Could she really tell that easily? Panic flared in your chest. "No, not at all! Why do you ask?" 

It was then that Sans came up behind you. 

"so, we ready to get this show on the road?"

Light chatter was bounced between the gang as you all walked comfortably to the bar, you shoulder to shoulder with Alphys, Sans on your other side. You tried not to notice that the lizard was clutching Undyne's hand tightly, while your own were tucked in your pockets.

"... I can't believe you haven't seen Mew Mew Kissy Cutie!"

"Ahaha, I'm not much of one for anime."

"Well, we'll just have to fix that, huh, punk?!"

You held the door for everyone as you came to the bar. It was bustling with monsters, which made you apprehensive, but Alphys gave you a small smile, silently reassuring you. Yes, you were with friends, this was okay, you were okay.

"go on, sweetheart, i've got this." 

Sans took the door from you, nodding for you to go ahead. You dipped your head, flushing, before ducking inside. It was very... cozy. In a way, it felt like home. Warm colors everywhere, monster chatting in friendly tones. The atmosphere was very welcoming.

Undyne waved at you from a booth, sliding in with her girlfriend beside her. Part of you was apprehensive. This meant you would be shoulder to shoulder with Sans. In public. Where you couldn't exactly run away, but, like, it wasn't like you wanted to run away. You put on your best smile, walking over to the table with Sans right beside you.

You slid in first, edging up to the wall somewhat reluctantly. Sans slid in beside you. Between the two of you, there wasn't much room. Your hands, eager for something to do, immediately grabbed at the small menu waiting there. You read it over uneasily about five times before Sans spoke up.

"i'd recommend the fries. they're pretty good."

"A-ah. Thanks."

Undyne narrowed her eye at the two of you, both unsure what to do. "Alright, what's going on between you two? You used to be all googly-eyed over each other, now you're both tense as rabbits."

Sweat beaded on Sans' brow as you frowned at her. "I told you, nothing is going on. Look, see?" In your haste to cover up how lack luster you were as a partner, you snatched up his hand and held it up, entangled in yours. 

Undyne sniffed, but dropped it. For now. You could have sighed in relief.

However, it seemed that now that Sans had ahold of your hand, he was intent on not letting it go. Even as Grillby came up, he refused to release his grip. He was smiling as he always did, looking slightly... relieved, in a way. But maybe you were reading him wrong and he was just putting on a show to cover up your little blip in the relationship just as you had. 

The thought made you want to frown and cry and maybe even scream, but you kept your smile the best you could.

Undyne orders a beer and some fries to go around. Alphys just asked for a glass of water, saying she was a lightweight and it was best if she not drink. You turned down the alcohol as well. Goodness knows what you might say in this state.

The night was nice, as were the fries. Eventually, the prickling feeling from being touched faded away, though it still made you oddly nervous. Sans was still reluctant to let go of your hand when the food came, but you eventually worked it out of his grasp with more then one sharp nudge on your part.

You talked about this and that as Undyne got increasingly drunk, updating Alphys on the status of Luka's new leg, informing her of the problem with cold but seeing no other bugs, at which she looked both proud and relieved. She rambled off a long, long list of anime titles you would have to watch with her and Undyne some time, at which you nodded politely. When the fries ran out, Sans' hand found yours again, which made you chuckle under your breath despite the insistent loathing that ate at your innards and made it hard to concentrate.

By the time it was dark and time to head home, Undyne was slammed. Sans and Alphys propped her between them and led her slowly to her house, you trailing awkwardly behind. She was surprisingly tired and somewhat emotional, mumbling under her breath quite a lot. By the time you got to her home, she was slightly more awake and beginning to move of her own accord. 

"You sure you don't need any help?" You grinned at the trio as they staggered up the steps of the large house.

"naw, we've got this, sweetheart. you head on home, i'll be there soon." Sans flashed you a reassuring, tired smile, trying to keep Undyne upright as Alphys unlocked the door. You frowned a bit, but reluctantly nodded. Maybe he wanted to talk with Alphys about something.

"Alright. I'll, uh, see you at home."

"sure thing."

Just as you turned and began the walk home, Alphys turned to give Sans a questioning look. He refused to meet her gaze as he hefted Undyne inside. 

When you got to the house, Papyrus was still up. He greeted with a warm welcome, asking where Sans was as you headed for your room.

"He'll be home in a few, I think. Undyne got pretty drunk."

"OH, I SEE. YES, THAT IS UNDERSTANDABLE."

You were washing your face in the bathroom, deciding that, despite the tense, awkward moments, you liked the night out, when you heard Papyrus' phone go off. 

"HELLO?"

You paid it no mind as you headed for your room fully intent on changing into pajamas. Specter was snoozing comfortably on your bed, waking just long enough to purr a hello as you patted his head. You smiled at him, leaning down to give him a kiss. You patted your pockets, wanting to plug your phone in, only to discover you must have left it in the living room. You made a face, then shuffled into the living room. Papyrus was in the kitchen. You scooped up your phone, then turned to head back to your room.

"SANS?" You paused. "BROTHER, WHATS THE MATTER? ... Mistake? Sans, what are you...? ... ... The human?" Your blood ran cold as ice. "Now, brother, I'm sure they don't... ... Well, yes, I did notice, but perhaps they just... ... Sans, I don't think..." Papyrus continued unsurely, sounding confused. 

A mistake? You? Was Sans regretting being with you? Asking you to live with him? Everything? You tried to take a deep breath, feeling everything ready to boil over. No, no, surely that wasn't it... But then, what had you done for him? Especially compared to what he did for you? Luka nudged your knee worriedly as you clutched at your hoodie.

She followed close behind you as you rushed to your room.

You just needed to someone to talk to about this! More then anything, you wanted to talk about what was going on, ask someone for help, something!

Gaster? You didn't want to seem like a neglectful partner to his son. His perspective would be skewed, surely?

Alphys? No, she was his friend longer, she would side with him.

Toriel? Same with Alphys. 

You just wanted some middle ground! Someone who would just give you their opinion without necessarily already have picked a side, more or less.

But these were your only friends.

Maybe you just needed someone who would just tell the flat truth.

A sudden realization broke through your panicked mind. Your gaze snapped to the box lying in wait under your bed. You fished it out hastily, shoving photos aside haphazardly until you found the one you were looking for. On the back was a hastily scribbled message, a number beneath it.

"Hey, pal! Always remember, you need someone to talk to, I'm here for ya!"

You clutched your phone tighter, reading the numbers over a few times before stuffing the picture under your pillow and sliding the box back under the bed. You hastily headed down the hall, finding Papyrus standing vacantly beside the bookshelf covered in movies, shuffling the movies around as if he wasn't sure what to do.

Luka whined lightly as you headed for the front door, tail wagging low as she trailed close behind you.

"Hey, Papyrus, I'm heading off to the store, I'll be back... soon."

"O-okay, human. Be careful out there. It is dark."

"I know. I'll be back later." With that, you rushed out the door, making sure Luka stayed inside, and started down the sidewalk, heading for where you assumed he still lived. You pulled your phone up, turning it on and shooting Sans a message about going to the store before bringing up the number pad for calling someone. You hesitated slightly, then tapped in the numbers.

It rang a few times. Then,

"Hello?" The voice was just as you remembered it, carefree and rough around the edges.

"H-hey, bro. It's, um, it's been a while, hasn't it?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another awkwardly paced chapter. Oops. I'm still not sure what I'm doing.


	7. Cigarette smoke and careful embraces

"Paps, you're still up."

"Y-yes. The human left saying they were going to retrieve groceries, but they have yet to return, and I do not see anything missing from our grocery inventory."

"yeah, they sent me a message about that. you go on to bed, it's late. i'll wait up for them."

"O-okay. ...Sans? Will everything be okay?"

"i hope so, Paps. goodnight."

"Goodnight, brother."

 

Sitting in your older sibling's living room after all these years makes you feel very small. You tuck your legs up to your chest as you look around. On the table beside you is a picture of a pale, golden smiling dog, dripping water but obviously very happy. A faint smell of smoke hung in the air.

Your sibling himself was sitting casually in his usual recliner, looking as if it wasn't odd that you had decided to show up out of the blue in the middle of the night. The TV was on but muted, casting his features in a slight silhouette and glittering on his stubble. 

"Do you... still smoke?"

"Nah, gave that up last year. What you're probably smellin' is my friends' cigarettes. They left about an hour before you called up."

"Oh, I see. I'm... proud of you. For giving it up."

"Knew it would make you pleased... Uh, I heard about Molly and Duster and Tumbler. They were good pests."

"Thank you."

Another long, awkward silence. He looked half asleep, but if you knew anything about him, that didn't mean he was sharp as ever. He picked up a glass beside him- filled with what seemed to be ginger ale, no doubt mixed with booze- and swirled it around before taking a careful sip.

"So. Um. Monsters?"

"No real opinion on 'em. They don't really rub me the wrong way, but I don't exactly go jumping to take shots for 'em either."

More silence.

"H-how've you been?"

"Got a promotion recently."

"That's good."

He grunted in some form of agreement. Then, "And you?" 

It surprised you that he cared. Three years ago, he would have been rambling about his promotion, not really caring for your own achievements. "... Fine. More or less. I, uh, moved in with some friends."

"Really?"

"Y-yes. I got into an accident a little while ago and they took me in while I recovered. Eventually it just seemed logical that I stayed."

"Kind of 'em."

"Yes." More silence. 

"One of 'em your partner?"

"W-what?"

"I just kinda figured."

"Well, yes, but..."

"'But?' So that's why you finally called up your older bro, eh?"

"... Yes."

"Well, I did tell ya I was here if you ever needed someone to talk to."

"R-really?"

"Well, yeah. I know we had a kind of falling out for a while there, but I was pretty sure you'd show up when you needed me. That's what I'm here for, after all." He shrugged as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"O-oh."

"'Oh?'"

"I-I thought you might have... still been mad with me." 

"Nah."

More silence.

"So, you gonna tell me about your lover or what?"

You flushed. "W-well. His-his name is Sans."

"As in the font? Geez, you always could pick 'em." Another sip. He began rocking slowly in the chair. "What's he like? Good enough for you?"

"Good enough?"

"Can't have some no good bastard messing around with my little sibling, eh? What kind of brother would I be?"

You laughed. It was almost like that fight all those years ago had never even happened. He was just as you remembered him: blunt, rough, but loyal all the same. "He's... kind. Funny. Dependable, in a lazy way. Loyal. A good shoulder to lean on. Always tries to make others happy." You paused. "L-Luka... She lost one of her legs in an accident. He, um, made a replacement for her."

"Mm. I don't know the guy, but if I trust your judgement, he doesn't sound too bad." Another sip. His eyes slid over to look at you. "And what ain't he?"

"... What?"

"No ones perfect, ya know. He's gotta have some fall backs."

"O-oh. Well, he... I think he wants to... go forward into a part of the relationship that I'm not ready for. N-not like that! He'd never force me, but... Sometimes I think he forgets that I am... the way I am."

He didn't say anything.

"I guess what I mean is he's very... good at relationships, in general, and since he is, he tends to forget I have trouble sometimes? I don't know. It's hard to explain."

"Nah, I gotcha. So, what made you come to me? If it was just that, I kinda doubt you'd actually come to me for advice."

"...I don't know where to start."

"Start with the beginning." He came over and sat himself beside you, giving you his full attention. It was obvious he was actually being serious about what he said.

So, you did. You started with getting together with Sans, the smooth beginning, about how you thought things were going so nicely, about how you probably jinxed it, about all the things he did, all the things he had done for you, about all the things you hadn't done for him. Part of you was reluctant to talk about /that/ night, but somehow it was coming out before you could even stop yourself.

"... but suddenly he was touching me and it felt... all kinds of wrong. I'd never, actually, you know, let anyone touch me before, like that. It was scary. I was scared. I pushed away and he picked himself up too and I guess he saw how scared I was because he pulled away, and I think maybe he thought that made it all better, but I just... I felt like there were hands all over me whenever someone touched me, so I kept pulling away and distancing myself..." You cringed at the memory, hands curling into the loose fabric of your hoodie. Your brother, hand over your shoulders, rubbed at your should in a comforting way. "I was getting over it, but...

"But?"

"But... earlier I heard him call his brother. He said something about a mistake and mentioned me, and I think... I think he thinks dating me was a mistake. And I feel like it's because he's realized how much he's done for me with so little in return, and... I don't know... how to fix it."

"Fuck 'im."

You looked up at him in shock.

"He's an ass if that's the reason he's breaking off with you, if that's what's really happening. To be honest, it sounds like a massive misunderstanding, and you really just need to talk about it rather then run away from it. But if he's really breaking off with you because you won't get intimate, he didn't deserve ya in the first place." He shrugged.

"... But..."

"No buts! Any guy is an asshole if he breaks up with someone just 'cause they won't give him something as big as that. It's a big thing, and guys who act like its the same as, fuck, I don't know, making them a cup of coffee, are shitting themselves."

"I guess."

"Doesn't matter how much he's done for you, either. If he doesn't respect that you wanna take it slow, I'll personally grind his face into the pavement."

You chuckled weakly. "Uh, no need for that."

"But I doubt that's what's happening. He sounds like a cool guy. If you just talk to 'im, I'll bet everything will be okay. Give it a shot, for your older bro's sake."

"O-okay."

"Ya got a picture of him?"

"O-oh, yes. Hold on." You fished out your phone and tapped in the password, quickly opening your photos. You scrolled through a moment, then settled on one Sans had taken as a surprise, you having been mid-laugh, him smiling coolly at the camera. You hesitated, then turned the screen for your sibling to see. There was a pause.

"That would explain the monster question earlier."

"Y-you're not... Mad?"

"Nah. He sounds like a cool guy, skeleton or not. Never knew you had a thing for bones, though."

"H-hey!"

"Aw, come on, your big brothers just teasing! C'mere!" He mashed you against him, mushing your face into his and rubbing exaggeratedly.

"Sto-op! Your stubble tickles!" You laughed out, trying to push him away.

"Aw, come on, give your big bro a sibling kiss!" 

"Ew, no, you need to shave!"

"It's manly stubble!"

You eventually struggled away, laughing all the while. He flashed you a grin, the gap where a baseball had knocked out one of his teeth showing. For a while, you just sat there, enjoying the wash of relief and vague feeling of home being with your sibling gave you.

"I should be getting back. Papyrus is probably worried. Sans, too. God, he must be freaking out." You sighed.

"I'll give ya a ride."

"Okay. Just drop me off at the end of the street, I'll walk the rest of the way."

"Whatever floats your boat. Come on." He lifted himself up, strolling over to the door, scooping up his keys along the way.

 

With one last wave, you turned away from your brother's car and started the walk of shame home. It was chilly, but bundled up in your hoodie, it didn't bother you too much. The front door would probably be locked. You fingered the rough edge of the keys in your pocket.

It was only a few minutes from the end of the street to the brothers' home, but it was enough time for your comfort to slip away, out of reach. What if Sans really did regret you? What if he was going to... break up with you? Would he kick you out? What about Specter and Luka? 

What about you?

You tried to shake off the impending panic as you started up the steps. You tried the doorknob. Locked. You pulled out your keys and clunked them into place. The door slid open easily under your grasp and you slid inside carefully, noiselessly. 

A light was on in the living room, casting everything in its warm glow. 

Sans was sitting on the couch, head in hands as he tapped a foot insistently against the wood. Luka was sitting vigil beside him, with Specter curled up beside Charlie's tank nearby. It was... very conflicting with what you expected. Perhaps some half-packed boxes. Maybe an uncaring Sans, an angry Papyrus. Not... This. 

You tried to put your keys down carefully, hoping by some miracle you could slip away unnoticed. His head jolted up at the small noise they made, eyes quickly finding yours. Hope lost. A relieved look flashed across his face and he stood.

"you're back."

"Yes."

"... you didn't go to the store, did you?"

"... No."

"Where were you?"

"... Nowhere." You looked away.

Silence. You walked carefully to the love seat across from the couch and sat. He sank back onto the couch, semi reluctantly. You both sat in silence for a while. Luka looked conflicted as to who to sit beside, eventually settling beside you.

"I... I think we need to talk."

"okay."

More silence. Sans' expression seemed to slowly fade from his usual smile to a very... lonesome look. Eventually, he looked away and scratched at his jaw.

"god, im going to miss you."

You blinked, then fear began fluttering in your chest as the words sank in. "W-what?"

"having you around, being with you... it's been great. i'm going to miss you. a lot."

"I-I... I don't understand."

He sighed as if resigned to his fate. "you're going to leave. all because of me. god, what am i going to tell Papyrus? ...thank you, for being with me and putting up with me for so long. i really loved it, while it lasted." His gaze eventually met yours, looking both raw with emotion and very sealed off all at once.

It took a few seconds for you to comprehend what he was saying. "What? I-I'm not going to leave you." You were utterly flabbergasted.

"you're... not?" He looked nearly as confused as you did.

"No! I thought you were going to leave me!"

"i would never leave you!"

You stared at each other for a while, both entirely confused. You got up and hesitantly sat beside him, though you still put space between you. A look of utter relief washed across his face and his hands twitched as if he wanted to reach for you. 

"oh my god, what a relief. i really thought i'd..."

"Same here. I think... I think we really need to talk."

"yeah, i can agree with that."

You began fiddling with your fingers. "Um. I guess... About that night..."

He visibly cringed, hands curling. "i'm sorry. i wasn't... i don't know what i was thinking."

"No, no, it's not your fault. I think I should have been comfortable with it, and I probably would have been if I wasn't... me."

His expression softened.

"I mean, I've always been afraid of what people would think of me, of my body, if I allowed them to see, and i guess that just kind of... triggered all my bad feelings at once. I... I wasn't expecting it." You winced, looking away.

His hand gently, carefully found yours. "you're absolutely wonderful, inside and out. you don't have to worry when you're with me."

"I know, but... I guess it'll just... take time. For me to shake off everything I've built up over the years."

"i know. it's okay. that's okay. i don't even care for that, so long as i can have you."

"... Thank you. I thought... I wasn't giving enough, and..." 

"you give me so much. i could never ask for more."

You blinked back tears, lifting his hand up to brush your lips against it. "Thank you." You took a deep breath, then stood. He was confused when you turned back to him. You extended your hand, palm up. "Would you like to... dance with me?" 

It was odd and embarrassing to say, but he smiled gently and took your hand. Soon you were rocking slowly to a song that wasn't there. Your head found his shoulder and nestled there. His arms were wrapped loosely around your waist, your own on his shoulders. You felt his ribcage expand, then relax in a sigh. 

For the first time in what felt like forever, you felt safe and comfortable.

Sans was relieved to have everything back to normal, you here with him, in his arms. He was relieved that you were safe, that you hadn't broken it off with him, that you hadn't just packed up and moved back to your half-empty house. He was relieved you'd had this talk. He was relieved you had confided with him.

And yet, leaning his cheek against your hair lightly, he caught a whiff of something: cigarette smoke, the tang of some carbonated drink, a warm and distinctly masculine smell underneath it all. You'd been with someone. Another guy. And you'd been close enough that his smell had rubbed off on you. 

It wasn't anger that made his magic prickle slightly, but apprehension. 

"... who did you go to see?" The words just barely ruffled your hair, warm and soft and gentle, not at all accusatory. You pushed your face deeper into the fluff of his hoodie, feeling sleep drag at your eyelids.

"... An old friend. He gave me some good advice. That's all you need to know."

"okay, sweetheart." 

He just wanted to savor the feeling of having you in his grasp again.


	8. Seed

As soon as you dozed off, you were jerked out of your comfortable state. A panicked voice was asking questions too quickly for you to catch them, hands running over you as if looking for injuries. 

"Gaster, please, slow down, I'm fine! I can't catch a word you're saying."

The skeleton, still looking worried and anxious, pulled away slightly. He murmured something under his breath, then pulled you into a tight hug. 

"Yes, yes, I'm okay."

He seemed to give a sigh of relief, then pulled away and gave you an almost furious look. He proceeded to wag his finger at you sternly, saying things you could just barely translate. It was clear he was angry that you hadn't come to him in your time of need and had been aware of the conflict between you and Sans, just as he was... disappointed(?) you had actively run away from him in your dreams.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry, I should have..." You sank to the floor, putting your head in your hands. "God, I've fucked up, Gaster. I've fucked everything up. I don't know how to fix it."

He seemed surprised at the sudden tears stinging at your eyes, carefully sinking down to sit beside you. He rubbed your back soothingly, tilting his head questioningly.

"I... I don't know. I feel like everything is wrong. Like it's okay, but it'll all go to hell again. I don't know what I'm doing, Gaster. I have no idea what to do with this relationship. I've never... gotten this far. I really like Sans and I want to be with him, but I don't know what to do with myself."

He hummed soothingly, then froze. He suddenly grabbed your shoulders and turned you sharply, shaking you slightly. You just stared at him, confused. He looked conflicted a moment, then raised a hand and pinched your arm sharply.

You jolted awake, blinking in the sudden dark. What...?

You were in your bed, oddly cold. It seemed, at some point in the night, someone had kicked off the blankets. Sans was beside you, but with enough space between you that he wasn't touching you. He seemed to be fussing in his sleep, frowning and scrunching up his eyes and turning this way and that slightly. You watched, confusion turning to concern as he balled up a fist and made a strangled noise. 

You sat up slightly, lifting a hand, hesitating, then touching his shoulder lightly.

"S... Sans?"

His sleep-panic seemed to falter slightly, but then he made another whimper-like noise. You lowered yourself down beside him, then reached out for him with both hands, lifting him into your embrace. He was slack in your arms, not so much as stirring as you adjusted him.

As soon as he seemed to register your warmth, he grabbed at you tightly and pushed his face into you, making another small noise. You wrapped your arms hesitantly around him and he mimicked the motion, bringing you flush against him. He let out a few puffs of air, burying his cheek into you before slowly relaxing.

"I'm... I'm here, Sans. I'm right here. You're okay. I'm okay." 

He seemed to melt as you spoke, not half as tense as he was a few moments prior. He mumbled something, rubbing his head against you in much the same manor Specter sometimes did. You smiled tiredly at him, drawing the blankets back over you both. Legs tangled in his, arms around him as his were around you, you relaxed against him. He let out a sigh, falling deeper into slumber just as you were slipping back. 

If only things could always be like this, some small part of you whispered, the seed of apprehension deep in your gut reopening and taking its hold just as you drifted into sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quickie just in case you thought you were safe.


	9. Healing takes time; sometimes, you relapse

"... But then they started going over how plants reproduce! And Frisk drew it! Right there in the middle of class! It was disgusting!" 

The flower in your arms made a face as if he was going to retch right then and there. Frisk, trotting along beside you as you walked them home, giggled.

"Hm."

You had a half smile plastered to your face, mind oddly numb except for the insistent nagging of it telling you you should be sleeping. Something was mumbling in the back of your mind, keeping you from concentrating as you walked Toriel's child to her home. Today, everyone else had been busy with other things, so it was left up to you to walk them, not that you minded.

"Hey, stupid face. What's with you? You seem even more dumb then usual today." Flowey had turned to give you a sneer of question, narrowing his eyes at you. You snapped out of it, eyes shifting down to him.

"Hm? Oh, it's nothing. Just kind of tired. Didn't get a lot of sleep last night."

Frisk frowned while Flowey rolled his eyes. 

"I'm okay. I'll feel better tomorrow, for sure." You shifted Flowey's pot a little, reaching out a hand to ruffle Frisk's hair. Part of Flowey's scarf came halfway unraveled he made a noise of discomfort. "Oops. Here." You adjusted it back, then settled him in your grasp again.

"... Idiot."

"Yeah." You sighed, not quite realizing it had slipped out. You looked down in surprise when Frisk tugged at you shirt, giving you a concerned look. "Oh. Uh." You averted your gaze, relieved to see you were very close to Toriel's. "Hey, look, we're here."

You showed them to the door, giving Toriel a smile and a wave before heading back to your boyfriend's home. 

His home. Not your own.

You tried to shake off the thought, but it curdled and stuck to your insides like glue. It clouded your thoughts as you shambled down the sidewalk, only half aware of your surroundings. 

Part of you had always wondered why Sans was so quick to let you stay with him. He said multiple times it was because he loved you and he wanted you close. But... Was it pity? Was it fate? Was it... because he felt he had to? Did he think it would have made him look bad if he hadn't? 

Did he only say such nice things to make you feel better?

You scratched furiously at the sides of your head, ruffling your hair into an even bigger mess. Why couldn't that small voice just shut up for once? Why couldn't you just be /happy?/

Because maybe you didn't deserve to be, the voice whispered. 

Your steps slowed, feet grinding against the pavement. Was that true? Now that you thought about it, you had been nothing but a bother to these kind monsters ever since they'd taken you under their wing. First, you'd been hesitant to actually let them in, then you'd gone and nearly gotten yourself- and Luka- killed, then they had taken care of you when you could hardly take care of yourself, and now... Now you were just back to step one. 

You felt oddly isolated. Alone. Like a freak. The one human among monsters who had to pamper and take care of you. The one human they'd taken pity on and now had to make sure didn't hurt itself.

You growled to yourself, clawing at your hair again. Shut up, shut up, shut up! You could hardly think without the voice invading your skull and filling up your thoughts. 

You got home eventually, pushing the door open tiredly. Specter bounded up to you, meowing a greeting and rubbing his long, white fur all over your dark sweatpants. 

"Hey, buddy. I'm just going to go and lie down. Feel free to join me." 

You gave him a light pat, then shuffled into your room and crashed onto the bed. Living life was exhausting. Being you was exhausting. Everything was exhausting. 

You were set and ready to fall asleep when your phone went off on your bed stand. You made a face of protest, but picked it up anyway. 

Incoming Call: Robert

Your brother? Well, okay. You tapped the small green button and brought it up to your ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's your big bro. It's been a few days, you have that talk with the bag of bones yet?"

You chuckled, rolling onto your back. "Yeah. You were right. It was all a misunderstanding. We've patched up the mistake."

"Of course I was right." He chortled on the other end of the line. "Eesh, you sound tired. You didn't decide to get down and dirty on him after all, did you?"

You made a face, flushing. "Ew, no, you perv! I just haven't been sleeping so great, that's all."

"Suuuuuuure."

"Shut up!" You groaned, laughing.

"babe, you back? i'm done with Luka's leg."

You lifted the phone away from your ear, calling out into the hallway. "Yeah, I'm in my room."

"Who ya hollerin' at?"

"Sans. He was fiddling with Luka's leg all day, and he just got done."

"Bet that's not the only thing he wants to fiddle with."

"Stop!" You laughed again, smacking your hand across your face to try and stop the blush creeping across your cheeks. "God, you're awful. I should have never gone to you."

Sans appeared at your door at that moment, brow bone raised. You scooted over to make room, patting the space beside you. He immediately complied, sliding up to your side and resting his head near your shoulder.

"who're you talking to?"

"Is that him?"

You chuckled, running a hand up Sans' spine. He let out a hum of content, though his gaze was still curiously locked on your phone.

"The one I went to talk to after Grillby's." You directed to Sans, lifting the phone briefly before talking into it again. "Yes, that's him."

"He sounds like a punk." 

"Be nice. He can hear you."

"Hey! You sound like a punk!"

"Hey!"

Sans chuckled, though it sounded odd hollow, then directed to your phone, "same to you, pal."

"Sans!" You hissed, quickly losing control of the situation. You sat up hastily, hopefully out of Sans' hearing range. "Sorry, he's just being mister snide pants right now." You made a face at Sans. He shrugged as if he didn't have a care in the world.

"Does he know who he just insulted?"

"Well, no. He knows you're the one I talked to that night, though." You lowered your voice, returning your full attention to your brother on the other end of the line. 

"You seriously keepin' me a secret? That's gonna look suspicious as fuck."

"Well, maybe, but... They can be a bit much and..."

"Yeah, yeah, you're not ready to introduce everyone yet. Fine by me, might not be so fine with your bag of bones. He still there?" 

You glanced back. Sans was watching you, arms folded behind his head, brow bones raising as you locked eyes with him. It was as if he was saying 'Well? You gonna lay here with me or what?'

You chuckled. "Yes, he's still here. Just lying down like the lazy bones he is."

"Tell him he sounds like a punk."

"Rob!"

"Fine, don't tell him the truth, then." He sniggered and the phone rustled. "Hey, I've gotta go. Keep in touch, will ya?"

"Sure thing. Bye."

"Bye."

Click.

You smiled to yourself, feeling better then you had all day. It surprised you how much you missed him. After that big argument all those years ago, you were sure he'd never want to see you again, and yet here you were, finding him the highlight of your day. You blinked out of your thoughts when two arms wound around you behind, a formidable bulk pressing against your back.

"so, who was it that just told me i sound like a punk?" His voice ruffled your hair and brushed past your air in a small gust of wind. You wiggled, then leaned into the embrace.

"I already told you. He's... an old friend. He helped me out, that night after Grillby's."

"hm. he's got some guts, going around telling your boyfriend he's a punk." Sans grip on you tightened a fraction. Perhaps you imagined it.

"He's... pretty brash. Sorry." You laughed, shaking your head at the whole situation. "Never took you to be the sensitive type."

"more like the 'doesn't like to be insulted by strangers he's never met' type."

"Sans, please. He was joking. Trying to get a rouse out of you. That's practically his entire shtick." You leaned back against him, feeling your previous tiredness creeping into you again. "Sans, come on. I just want to lie here with you. Not discuss the guy who just called you a punk."

He sighed into your hair, nuzzling your shoulder briefly before dragging you to the mattress, resting again his ribcage. It was... odd, but not uncomfortable.

"alright, i'll let it go just this once, but only if we get to lie here like this for at least an hour."

"Alright." You rested your head against his sternum, listening to the faint beating hum of his soul. You brought a hand up and ran it over the curve of one of his ribs, just visible through his shirt. "How's Luka's leg?"

"fine. i was just tampering with the internal heating element. now it shouldn't falter when it's exposed to extreme cold." His teeth brushed the top of your head. Somewhere, Specter meowed. Luka responded with a sneeze.

"... Thank you."

"for making sure Luka's leg doesn't lock up again?"

"For everything."

A long, long pause. He sat up, forcing you into his lap. The position made you uncomfortable, but you were distracted away from that when your eyes found his. He was looking at you in some mix of concern and... realization?

He just looked at you like that for a few long moments.

"...that again?"

"... What?"

"the whole 'thank you for everything,' 'i'm sorry for everything' thing. i'd thought you'd moved on from that, sweetheart." His hand found your cheek and cradled it as you looked away, shame and self loathing taking the place of apprehension.

"... I'm sorry."

"don't be."

"No, not for... Not for that." You squeezed your eyes shut, not wanting to see him when he was looking at you like that. "I'm sorry that you always have to walk on eggshells around me. I'm sorry that I am the way I am. I'm sorry that I'm so... dysfunctional, but functioning anyway. I'm sorry you constantly have to worry about what kind of trouble I'm getting into. I'm sorry I worked my way into your life. I'm sorry I forced you to take pity on me. I'm sorry I'm here. I'm sorry... that you ever had to meet me. You would probably be happier if I wasn't here."

The words came out as soon as you opened your mouth, and you were finished before you could stop yourself. You cringed at yourself, hiding your face in your hands as little shudders told you you were about to break down and start sobbing. You expected Sans to sigh and say something along the lines of "Oh, good, you finally figured it out. Yeah, it would be best if we never spoke again, leech."

For a moment that stretched on like an eternity, nothing happened.

Sans was very taken aback, worried and, in a way, terrified. When had this started? Had it been that night, almost two weeks ago? Had it been before that? From the beginning, even? Had he done this, somehow? Implied something that could be taken the wrong way? 

More importantly, how had he not seen the signs? He'd noticed you slowing down recently, drifting off more, not being as focused, not smiling quite as sincerely, but he'd thought that was just the aftershocks of the little... miscommunication. He'd never thought it was something like this. 

He was shaken out of his thoughts when you made a small noise, trying to strangle a sob as you took his silence for rejection. He quickly reached for your hands and pulled them away from your face, hastily wiping away a few tears that slid out from behind your lashes. Your eyes found his, so full of raw pain and self loathing that it made his own soul ache.

"what made you think all those things? what made you think i'd be happier if you weren't here?"

You looked away, fresh tears welling at the edges of your eyelids. "I just... You've done /so much/ for me, and all I've done is sit here and soak it all up like some fat, ugly sponge. I've done next to nothing for you, and... it makes me hate myself. I just wish I could... do something for you." Your voice was low and soft, almost shy as if it was hard to admit or bring to the open.

"you want to do something for me?" He carefully cradled your face, eyes searching for yours. Eventually, your gaze slid up to meet his. 

"... Yes." It was a whisper, so quiet but so full of everything you weren't able to put to words.

"then just be here with me."

He smiled gently at you, your own expression filling with confusion.

"there is nothing more i could ask for then you to just be here with me. sometimes i just sit here and wonder what i ever did to deserve you, to deserve having you with me, because there is no one else in the world i would rather spend my entire life with. sometimes i think the way you just spoke, wondering if you would be happier without me here, butting into your life. i'm still surprised you returned my feelings." He chuckled to himself, looking away in much the same manner you had just moments before. "you, with how great and wonderful you are, wanting to be with a no good bag of bones like me? it all feels so unreal at times."

His gaze slid back up to meet yours, and he smiled ever so slightly wider. 

"but then i look up or wake up or turn around, and there you are. and it makes me the happiest skeleton alive. i don't know why you're even with me, but don't ever think i'd be happier without you here with me, because i couldn't be any happier when you /are/ with me." His eyelids drooped softly, and he searched your face as if it was something straight out of a dream.

One of your hands came up and laid gently over his, still on your cheek. The warmth of it made him smile yet a little wider. "Oh, Sans..." You sighed out, gaze searching his as if wondering if the truth was written there. Some distant part of your mind noted how his cheekbones were tinted blue. "Do you... really mean that?"

"of course i do. i've never lied to you."

"Oh, Sans." You closed your eyes as if it pained you to look at him for a moment, pressing his hand into your cheek softly. "You... You can't be real. You're... You're so perfect. I just wish I could be the same to you." You looked back at him, eyes pleading. "Please, don't talk about yourself that way. You're so much more then you give yourself credit for."

He chuckled, then sniffled softly. Big blue tears welled up in his eye sockets. "i just can't imagine what you see in me."

"I could say the same to you, bonehead."

He laughed weakly, the tears spilling over the rims of his eyes. You reached up and drew his hands from your face, instead using your own to swab at his cheeks and catch the bright blue tears on your sleeves.

"it seems neither of us have any idea what we're doing." He chuckled, closing his eyes and leaning into your touch. It was a bit awkward, sitting on his lap as you wiped at his cheekbones, but you found you didn't mind.

"Well. I guess we can just be clueless together, then?"

"okay." He smiled softly, eyes closed as you ran a thumb under one of them.

"But, only if you promise me something."

His smile dropped slightly and he cracked one eye open to look at you almost fearfully.

"Promise me you won't think of yourself like that anymore. I'm more then happy to be with you, whether it be day or night, rain or shine."

"only if you promise you won't think like that yourself. you make me look forward to waking up every day, and i'm always glad to look out for you."

"Okay. I promise."

"then i promise too." He smiled a little more genuinely at that. Feeling the warm, gentle curve of his cheeks in your hands and searching his gaze for any sign of feigned adoration (and finding none), you smiled yourself.

"Good." With that, you brought his head forward and gave him a peck between the eyes. He blushed yet furiouser, grin broadening. 

"i love you, sweetheart."

"... S-Same to you, you big boney doofus."

His arms wrapped around your waist, one hand pulling your head forward so it rested on his shoulder. You draped your own arms around his oddly solid frame, letting out a long, relieved sigh.

"I never thought this was the way the day was turning."

"me neither."

"... I'm glad to have that off my chest."

"me, too."

"... Sans?"

"hm?"

"I... I won't get better in a day. Please, bear with me until I'm... back to being me."

"i'd wait an eternity if it meant you'd be happy again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOU GET AN ANGST  
> AND YOU GET AN ANGST  
> AND YOU GET AN ANGST  
> EVERYBODY GETS AN ANGST
> 
> (Note: Angst may not be very well written.)


	10. HE was your verte-bae, not this guy

Sans noticed your gradual change over the days that followed: you looked happier, brighter, not so tired, sharp and focused as before, even so much as glowing with health, being more affectionate again. Of course, this didn't mean you were 100% back to normal. You still had little moments where if he rested his hands on you wrong or if someone approached too quickly, you would recoil. But you were getting better. Getting happier. 

He also noticed that you began spending less of your free time with him. It wasn't like you were outright shunning or ignoring him, but it was enough that he began to notice. You began spending more time on your phone, either texting or calling someone whose caller I.D. went from being 'Robert' to 'Rob' to 'Robbie.' He initially caught onto this being the person you talked to so often when you asked him to bring you your phone whenever it was ringing and you were too busy to grab it yourself, giving him the chance to spot who it was calling you so often. 

He was beginning to get bothered by how happy you were while you talked with whoever it was on the other end of the line. Not angry, but... something else. Maybe just a tad suspicious. He trusted you, of course, but he didn't know who 'Robbie' was and what he might try to pull on you. He had called Sans- your verte-bae!!- a punk, after all. 

He was 'working' (dozing off) at one of his multiple odd jobs- a small ice cream stand that was in dire need of some business- when he registered you walk past on the other side of the street. He blinked himself awake, propping himself up straighter as you briskly trotted along the sidewalk. Were you coming to see him and had forgotten where the stand was? He was preparing to call out when he saw you suddenly brighten and call out yourself, waving an arm above your head.

Curious, he quickly flipped the sign to 'Closed' and exited the stand. He watched you break into a faster trot and quickly blipped forward to keep pace with you. A block or so away, he spotted someone- previously leaning against the wall of a coffee shop- straighten up and wave back to you, then seemingly brace himself and open his arms, as if trying to catch something.

He watched you jump into the embrace with a laugh, the person- who he could now see as distinctly masculine, with tousled hair and an obvious shadow running across his cheeks and chin telling he hadn't shaved in a while- clasping their arms around you and lifting you clear off the ground, making you squeal. 

He frowned. He should have been the only one allowed to do that. 

The man put you down and ruffled your hair, then walked with you into the coffee shop. Sans, now thoroughly suspicious, drew up his hood in an attempt to hide himself and crossed the street, soon entering the shop behind you. You and the man- Rob, he heard you call him, suspicions confirmed- had taken a booth a few seats away from the door. He passed casually, soon finding a spot not too far away where he could see and hear what happened without being seen himself.

"Have you been to this place before?"

"Obviously, otherwise I wouldn't have recommended it, doofus."

"Mean."

"Lead with your strengths."

He listened to you laugh, his magic prickling. Who did this guy think he was, making you laugh like that? That was his job.

"So, how've things been going with your friends I've yet to meet?" 

Sans quickly focused again, ordering a black coffee just to make the waitress go away.

"Nicely. Undyne's apparently decided to take up archery recently. I think you two would get along pretty well, actually. Other then that, not a lot. Oh, I introduced a different kind of pasta to Papyrus. Did I tell you about his spaghetti obsession?"

"Yeah. He seems like a real nut. Seems like you'd fit in well with all your pals. No wonder you get along so well." Sans prickled yet furiouser.

"Oh, yeah, because you're not quirky at all, mister I-collected-records-for-three-years."

"I'm kiddin'. I'd like to meet your pals some time. They sound pretty cool."

"I won't introduce you until you stop being such a butthead." Sans saw you pout, crossing your arms.

"No promises." The man chuckled and readjusted his position, lounging back. "And how about your boney boyfriend?" Sans watched you flush, and, while he found it adorable, he wanted to be the only one to see you look so cute.

"Things have been..." He heard you hesitate as if searching for the word and held his breath. "... wonderfully. Much better then... before. He's real sweet when he wants to be." Sans smiled to himself, feeling both accomplished and somewhat relieved, and he couldn't quite stop the faint blush from creeping across his cheeks. "I don't know what I'm going to do for Valentine's, though. I mean, they always make it out to be the time when couples get, like, intimate." You looked away awkwardly, cheeks turning a deeper shade of red.

"Nah. Just do whatever will make you both happy. No weird human-skeleton intimacy needed."

"Hm." He watched you scrunch up your nose and tap the tabletop. "I might... Oh, I've got an idea!" He noticed you suddenly brighten, snapping your fingers. 

"Ah, ya see? I've always got ya covered."

"Can't say it's wrong."

He listened to you chat with the man for while, the subject drifting from one thing to another with no real purpose. He felt kind of bad for eavesdropping after a while, realizing the man was making no obvious moves towards you, though he didn't seem hesitant to break the physical barrier at all. His magic still prickled, however; you were very open and friendly with this person in a way he hadn't seen you be before. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but you smiled at Rob with a certain kind of affection he'd never seen from you prior. 

Eventually, you both left, paying for your individual items and leaving a small rip on the table. He did the same, watching as you shared one last shoulder pat before departing in opposite directions. With that, he returned to his stand as if nothing had happened.

The prickling, which he couldn't think of a name for, continued throughout the day and made him somewhat morose in his brooding. By the time he was set to lock up and head for home, he tried to shake off his lurking suspicions. Whoever it was, you trusted them enough to so much as search for advice from them about your concerns in you and your lovers relationship, even the more embarrassing kind. He shouldn't be so suspicious. 

And yet...

You spent so much time talking with this guy recently. You'd even stopped cuddling with Sans- your verte-bae!!!- to pick up a call from him and chat! He was your verte-bae! Who did this guy think he was, stealing precious cuddling time away from him?

He got home soon enough, pushing those thoughts to the back of his mind. He was pleased to see you in the kitchen, cooking with Papyrus. It warmed his soul whenever he spotted you getting along with him so well. Made it really feel like a home. 

Some song was playing that you and Papyrus both recognized, both shimmying about and singing into spoons or spatulas. Luka was frisking about with you, the metal toes of her prosthetic leg clittering against the floor. Specter was watching from a perch on the counter. He turned and meowed a greeting to the short skeleton when he came up and leaned beside him.

"gee, starting a party without me? i'm hurt."

You jumped, quickly straightening yourself and lowering the spoon. He felt very pleased as he saw that cute little flush soak into your cheeks. "O-oh! You're home! How was work?"

His mind flashed back to you and Rob at the coffee shop and he tried to crush the memory. "uneventful. how was your day?" 

You came forward and gave him a quick kiss to the cheekbone, making his own cheeks turn slightly blue. "Pretty good, actually! I went to see Rob at some coffee shop in town."

"oh, really? how did that go?" He sat at the small island in the middle of the kitchen as you turned back to a pan full of simmering sausage balls. He didn't like lying to you, but this was more avoiding the truth then anything. It wouldn't hurt anyone.

"It was nice! It's been so nice to catch up with him again."

"glad you had a good time."

You gave him a smile, then turned and scolded Specter as he came up to sniff at the pan in front of you, telling him he most surely didn't own the place but could remain on the counter top so long as he didn't get into anything. He couldn't help but smile himself as you gave the fluffy cat a quick smooch before turning back to what you were doing.

 

After dinner and a few movies, you were on the couch, reading a book with his head in your lap. You would hum every so often, make a slight face at other times, raise your eyebrows, all depending on what happened in the novel. It was one from the underground, and you had been eager to read it despite how battered it was. Papyrus had gone to bed a little while ago, and it was very quiet except for the quiet bubbling from Charlie's tank. Said fish was floating gently near the bottom, seemingly sleeping.

"I like moments like this. They're nice." You eventually sighed out, looking tired.

He hummed in response, nearly asleep himself. He woke up slightly at your next words.

"It was hard to read when I was younger. Robbie would always poke around me and try to steal my books, just to make me mad." Was Rob a past lover? The thought hadn't occurred to him. His magic prickled much more strongly then before. 

He shook himself out of the train of thought when you chuckled to yourself.

"Yeah, we didn't get along the best. Were you and Papyrus like that when you were little baby bones?"

That threw him through a loop. "what?"

"You know, fight all the time and get on each other's nerves. It always made me confused when siblings on tv got along so well. I wasn't exactly the brightest bulb in the box at the time. I was wondering why Robbie and I weren't like that."

Sans is processing. His opened both of his eyes, peering up at you. "Robbie's your brother?" 

"Mmhm." You looked back down at him curiously, very groggy. "Why?"

And everything clicked into place. 

He stared at you for a moment before laughing. You blinked in confusion when he sat up and drew you into his lap, still chuckling to himself. How could he have been so oblivious? Eesh, and others said Papyrus was the one who had trouble picking up on the hints. 

"Sans? What are you laughing about?"

He calmed his sudden giggles, tucking you into his embrace and pulling your book away so you couldn't focus on it. "nothing, sweetheart. cuddle me. i'm bone tired."

You whined briefly, but relaxed a moment later and reclined into him, sending his soul fluttering warmly. Your eyelids fluttered briefly, obviously on the brink of sleep. "Alright. But only because I'm too tired to read anyway."

"thank you, sweetheart." He brushed his teeth to your hair, then to your cheek, making you giggle. 

"The pleasures all mine." 

Before he could respond, you had dozed off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like
> 
> Shit
> 
> I caught something recently and it makes it hard to write so either expect lots of chapters as I find nothing better to do or none because I can't focus on anything


	11. Just overprotective...ly jealous

A few weeks had passed. Things were going nicely. You and Sans had gone out on multiple little dates, enjoyed being together, and over all things had been going smoothly since the previous incident.

The main place you went to for dates was Grillby's. You had warmed up to the place soon after that first double date with Alphys and Undyne, the cozy atmosphere and friendly guests bringing a smile to your face. The monsters that often went there soon recognized you as Sans' verte-bae- whom he had apparently talked about often before- and greeted you with open arms, soon becoming what you consider borderline friends.

Except Lily. 

She was an anthropomorphic rabbit-like monster that apparently didn't like you being with Sans. You didn't know if she just wanted you out of the picture or actually had a thing for Sans, but she made a point to be very touchy-feely and borderline flirty whenever you were there with him. It was hard to avoid, since she was one of the few waitresses that manned the floor. It made you uncomfortable, but that didn't mean you didn't like going!

Especially with Undyne and Alphys for double dates. They were fun and cute and Sans took it as a chance to show you off, which, while flustering, made you feel very loved. You, on the other hand, liked to spruce yourself up a bit and look nice when you went out on these dates. It made you feel... more confident, in a way. 

(However, your idea of looking nice still meant sweaters or hoodies. But, hey, these were actually your size and not baggy enough to hide your frame! That was good, right?)

You ran your brush through your hair one last time, made sure you didn't have anything on your face, then walked out of the bathroom and slipped your shoes on. Tonight was one of those few nights where you, Sans, Alphys and Undyne all had time off to get together. Papyrus was left to man the house alone, and you found it funny to note that he seemed relieved he could watch Mettaton classics without your somewhat snarky commentary.

Sans, waiting by the door, smiled when his gaze rested upon you. "ready to go?" He held out an elbow jokingly, giving you a somewhat condescending glance.

"Ready as I'll ever be." You laughed, hooking your arm into his with a snobbish head toss. "Bye, Papyrus! See you later!"

"GOODBYE! BE SAFE!"

"see ya, Paps."

You gave Luka one last pat, then directed her to sit as you left. The funny thing to note was that she was known for not moving from said spot until you got back. She probably would have jumped off a cliff if you told her to, Toriel had said once. The door clicked softly clicked behind you, and with a familiar lurching feeling you were standing outside Undyne's house.

You clutched your head, not prepared for the jump through space. "Geez, warn me next time." You laughed, still somewhat dizzy.

"sorry." 

Before more could be said, Undyne came leaping out of the house with Alphys much more calmly behind. Within fifteen minutes, your little party had arrived at your destination and was sitting comfortably at your usual booth. 

Lily came up and, with a smile aimed at Sans and passing glance to you, asked what you'd like. Sans was preparing to say something your usual when you spoke first.

"Get me something from behind the bar. Whatever you like is fine. Show me what monsters have, alcohol-wise." You gave her as patient smile as you could manage. If she wanted to play this game tonight, you might as well make it tolerable. You weren't one to drink, but you were feeling relaxed and wanted to see what they had.

Sans blinked in surprise, but recovered quickly enough to just say he wanted his usual. Alphys and Undyne ordered something similar- some food to share- and Lily went on her way with another large smile to Sans.

She came back faster then you would have liked.

She leaned her elbows against the table, a little closer to Sans then you were comfortable with. He was fine with it, however, as he seemingly didn't care about her advances. They struck up a conversation casually enough, leaving you with pretty much alone as Alphys and Undyne more or less joined in with their conversation. At one point, Undyne caught your eye and raised an eyebrow as if asking if you were bothered. You gave your best mellow smile and shrugged. 

After a little while, the place got enough business that Lily was too busy to be chatty. You had a few drinks, shared some fries with Sans, and overall had a good time. A few monster were up and dancing in a space in the middle of the floor, something you were a tad surprised about. When you inquired about it, Undyne grinned.

"It's been a thing for a while now! Every Thursday, they open up the floor for monsters who like to dance! Come on, Alphys!" She proceeded to drag her girlfriend to the floor and coax her into dancing, if somewhat clumsily. 

You were left with Sans in the booth, watching the small crowd amusedly.

"Do you dance?"

"nah. too much effort. you?"

"Not very well." You laughed, then nudged him. "Hey, let me out. I love this song."

Surprised, the skeleton slid out as you headed for the floor. He hung back to watch you. Apparently those few drinks made you feel a tad more comfortable then usual as you shimmied your way into the small group and got accepted with grins. He watched you rock from side to side, hips swiveling smoothly as you fell into the beat of the song. 'Not very well?' That was your insecurity talking. You didn't look half bad out there, if he did say so himself.

Apparently, he wasn't the only one who thought so. 

Someone- an anthropomorphic tree monster of some sort- was watching you from the other side of the circle. It took Sans a moment to notice. The monster was apparently admiring the way you were moving and sidled closer, shooting you a grin. Oddly enough, you returned it and accepted the invitation, falling into rhythm with the monster.

Sans' magic prickled and he leaned back against the table, crossing his arms.

He narrowed his eyes as the monster feigned giving you a twirl, making you laugh. After that, he grabbed your hand, spun you away from him, then spun you close. Oddly enough, you were too busy giggling to seem bothered. He knew you weren't flat out drunk, but apparently being tipsy did a lot for how comfortable you felt in a given situation. 

It was when the monster shot you a smirk that could be considered flirty, dipping you in his arms, that Sans made his move.

As he closed the distance between you and him in calm, steady steps, he could feel his magic prickling furiously. He should be the only one to make you smile and laugh like that. He should be the only one to hold your hands. He should be the only one to hold you in a close embrace. Not some no good stranger probably just there to pick someone up.

He didn't quite notice Alphys nudge Undyne and discreetly point out the scene.

When you noticed him approaching, you bounced out of the monster's arms- making said monster shoot a confused look your way- and towards your skeletal lover. He was smiling as ever, if somewhat strained with sockets slightly narrowed. 

"Hi! Want to join us?" You said breathlessly, giving him an adoring smile. The monster behind you was seemingly waiting for a chance to sweep you up again, watching you interact with the skeleton with a look of apathy.

Wordlessly, Sans drew you into a kiss, teeth meeting lips in a way very different then his usual tender kisses. You relaxed into it after a brief moment of hesitation, then giggled as he brushed his teeth to your cheek.

"nah. i've got two left feet. come over here and keep me company."

Looking happy but somewhat confused, hand in hand, you followed him back to the booth. Sans shot a look in the monsters direction, who was looking somewhat put off but not so upset as to start a conflict. Undyne and Alphys came over shortly behind you, Undyne grinning menacingly.

"Y-you guys ready to go home?" Alphys giggled out, shooting Sans a knowing look. He- though blue in the face- didn't say anything about it.

He walked you home with an arm around your waist. Undyne was giggling about it. 

You, in your hazy state, took your time realizing why he had come up and done such a public display of affection out of the blue. It was when you were heading up the steps of their house that it dawned on you. You chuckled, stopping him on the steps by snagging his hoodie sleeve.

He turned, cocking an eyebrow at you in question. You just smiled, then brushed a kiss to the corner of his teeth. It was something you had taken to doing shortly after you noticed he considered it teasing. He whined when you slid from corner to the other with a feather light touch and attempted to make the touch closer. He pouted when you pulled away with a laugh.

"Aw, Sans. Did we get a little jealous because you didn't have the /guts/ to dance with me?" You whispered softly, batting your eyes. You knew that made him crazy. Whether it was just because you currently felt so confident, or because the alcohol was curbing your brain-to-actions filters, you smirked at him. 

His hands found your cheeks, trying to pull you into him. "not jealous. just overprotective." 

You pulled away a second before your lips brushed his teeth, making him whine. "All that dancing really tired me out. Goodnight, Sansy." You giggled when he blushed yet darker, frowning at you. You put a hand on the doorknob, ready to head inside and relieve Luka of sentry duty. His hand caught your sleeve.

"goodnight kiss for your verte-bae?" He grinned wider, though his blue cheekbones gave away how flustered he was.

"Hmmm." You put a hand on his cheek, leaned close, looking at him through half closed eyes. "Sorry, but I only give out kisses to dancers." With that, you laughed and straightened up without so much as a peck to the cheek and opened the door, going inside.

As you ruffled Luka's fur with an affectionate croon, Sans was left to pout for the rest of the night, grumbling that he better get paid double in kisses tomorrow. All you did was chuckle, wiggling your fingers at him before blowing a kiss as you disappeared into your room, leaving a very flustered skeleton behind.


	12. A/N

Hey, authors note!

So a lot of people noticed that the last chapter bore a striking resemblance to another writer's work and were bothered by it. While I initially don't read inserts very often and had never read this one in particular, it bothered me, too. I'll be rewriting the chapter to see if I can make it something more original. I feel like its not worth the struggle to keep it up, especially since I wasn't very satisfied with it in the first place. The second attempt should be better and not look like a knockoff of someone else's piece, I promise! :) I'm sorry for the big misunderstanding. :P

Look forward to seeing it sometime tomorrow!


	13. "Okay"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Okay": Remastered edition!

"Bye-bye, Luka! Be a good girl while we're gone!"

You gave your dog one last kiss on the head, receiving a lick in return, before stepping out the door behind Sans. It was the perfect night for a date-till-dark: Papyrus was with Alphys and Undyne for the night, you and Sans both didn't have anything pressing to do, it felt lovely outside, and Sans had made plans (that he wouldn't tell you about). Your hand found his as you strolled happily down the sidewalk, excited about the fun sure to ensue.

"So, Grillby's first, right?"

"no bones about it."

"And what after that?"

"a surprise."

"Sans! You know how I feel about secrets! Just tell meeeee!" You whined playfully, swinging his arm.

"not a chance. all you need to know is that you'll enjoy it."

"You're impossible."

"ah, but that's why you love me."

You flushed and he shot you a smug grin. "No! ...Well, maybe, but that's besides the point."

You arrived at the bar when it was just beginning to get busy. While it still made you slightly self conscious and nervous, you held onto Sans' hand as a subtle reminder that you were okay and with someone who understood your feelings and cared about you despite. His thumb ran over your knuckles soothingly as if he sensed your turning gut. You gave him a smile, then turned and waved your free hand to the group of dog monsters you'd grown to know and love. They greeted you in a chorus of sound, Greater Dog barking deafeningly.

Yes, oddly enough, the dog monsters had grown to find you as 'one of them,' though that may have just been because you invariably smelled like Luka and food. They allowed you to play card games with them more then once before and had become something close to being your best friends.

Sans was both proud and relieved; proud you were reaching out to others without much guidance, and relieved you seemed to finally be shaking off your anxiety. No matter how much he may have denied it, your anxiety sometimes felt like a drag, keep you from properly enjoying your time with him, and thus affecting how much he enjoyed the time he spent with you. He would deny it to the ends of the earth if you asked him if your anxiety bothered him, simply saying he would help you through it so you could be happy. It wasn't a lie, just... not entirely the truth.

You sat at the bar, Grillby giving you a small nod and welcoming smile. Without a word, he disappeared through the fire exit, no doubt getting both you and Sans your usual. You smiled fondly after the fire monster.

"Grillby's a pretty great guy. I'm glad you introduced me."

"he is pretty hot."

"Sans, please." You shook your head in feigned disappointment. "I think he and Richard have been meeting up here sometimes? Richard mentioned him more then once, I think. That must be a pretty awkward friendship, eh? Two big, unreadable guys just staring at each other for hours at a time."

Sans chuckled. "glad to hear your boss is friendly to monsters." He slid a look in your direction, hoping you'd pick up on the hint.

"Oh, please, he only threatened to punch you that one time." You joked, leaning forward to prop your arms up against the bar.

"i wouldn't put it past him to do it again."

You laughed, then let out a small sigh of content. "I like moments like this. Just us, sitting here and enjoying each other's company. Really makes me feel... at home."

Sans smiled broader, reaching out and taking your hand in one of his own. "me, too."

You brushed your thumb over the odd, knobby knuckles of his phalanges, studying how they shifted and moved. "How've you been feeling recently? Happy, sad, etc.."

He chuckled. "what do you think?"

"I just wanted to make sure."

"of course i've been happy, ya numbskull."

"Hey, you're the boneheaded one here."

"it ain't nice to tell a fibula."

"I was just trying to be humerus-"

"Hey, Sans, I didn't see you over here!" A third voice suddenly interrupted and you quickly shut your mouth. Lily. Yippee. She quickly came up and sat in the spot beside Sans, giving him a big smile. "How're you doing, you old sack of bones?"

"just taking my verte-bae out on a date." He said proudly, though his hand slipped from yours to rest, arms crossed, on the bar.

"Oh, hey." Lily greeted you much less enthusiastically, sparing you a condescending glance from Sans' other side.

"Uh, hi." You waved half heartedly, giving a somewhat forced smile. Maybe she would leave you in peace since it was a date. She didn't. Instead, she quickly dragged Sans' attention to her, chatting animatedly about the schools underground.

Yeah, okay. This was fine. She'd have to leave eventually, and then you and Sans could resume your date in peace. All you had to do was wait.

Grillby returned with two plates, spotted Lily sitting beside Sans, and seemed to give her a slight look. Yeah, even he knew what was going on. With a small nod, he pushed the two plates in front of you and Sans. Lily was quick to steal a fry from Sans' plate, laughing all the while.

You'd long since noticed that she wanted you out of the picture. You were content to ignore her, but still felt slightly betrayed when Sans chose to either ignore or not notice her blatant attempts to make you feel isolated. Whenever you tried to tell him about it, he took it as you being jealous and teased you but would end up saying that they were friends and nothing more and that you should trust him enough to already know that. He never really heard you out, not even when you asked him to just listen for once. Hurt, he'd said she was a long time friend and trustworthy and that you should trust his judgement.

Yeah, okay. You'd tried. He'd tried to get you to socialize with her on multiple occasions, each time ending with you feeling the sting of backhanded comments and passive aggressive quips and becoming silent and turning in on yourself. Each time, he'd responded with a frown and a sigh, as if you were the one at fault. In a way, that had stung worse then whatever she decided to nail you for. Of course, you did understand why he was exasperated; if you thought someone was refusing to get along with your friend just because, you would get tired of it, too. That made it hurt only slightly less.

You picked at your food for a while, listening to them go on and on about things from the underground. Five minutes passed, then five more, then five more, then five more. Sans' name was called from somewhere across the room. He glanced up and shot someone a lazy smile, standing. 

"be back in a minute." He nodded to you and Lily, soon crossing the room to stop beside some large plant monster. You were left alone, with her.

You saw her looking at you with a vaguely disgusted expression for several moments before you glanced up. She met your gaze steadily, upper lip curling slightly as if you were repulsive to look at. After a moment, you looked down at your plate again, avoiding her gaze.

"You should really just give it up, you know."

You flinched slightly and slid a glance her way. She wasn't look at you, instead looking out across the bar. 

"Like, we all know you're the one forcing the relationship. There's no use trying to look like a goody two shoes." She leaned back slightly, propping an elbow on the bar. "We all know he's only with you out of pity. I'm surprised you're even trying anymore. You should just really cut it off and let him breath again." 

Your chest tightened and you pushed your food away. With shaking hands, you picked up your glass of water, took another sip, then set it down. After a moment, you turned and stood, walking across the floor of the bar. 

You wanted to be away from her. Anywhere but here. Even if the words weren't true, they stung worse then a hundred wasp stings. 

You stopped beside the packed dogs table, Lesser Dog greeting you with a curious sniff. You smiled shakily, giving him a ruffled pat between the ears. He licked at your hand, giving his tail an enthusiastic wag. 

"Are you alright, dear?" Dogarressa asked you gently from her place tucked into Dogami's arm, tilting her head with a questioning sniff. 

"I'm... fine. If Sans wants to sit and talk to Lily for goodness knows how long, who am I to get in the way?" You shrugged, then gave Greater Dog a scratch behind the ear. 

"Lily? Oh, dear..." Dogarressa gave you a worried look. Apparently, even they knew of how Lily was treating you.

"Now, human, I'm sure it's not like that." Dogami tried to sooth you, looking like he was about to go on of his infamously long explanations when you put up your hand and shook your head.

"Whatever it is, I'm sure he'll have a better time talking to her when I'm not here."

With that, you turned to go. Greater Dog snagged your sleeve gently in his teeth and gave out a placating whine. You tugged your arm free, but gave him a reassuring pat before disappearing out the door.

When Sans returned to the bar a moment later, he was surprised to see Lily sitting there alone. When he inquired about where you were, she shrugged and gave him a confused look.

"I don't know. They just up and left as soon as I tried to start a conversation."

Several pairs of dog ears were tuned in as Sans huffed and, assuring himself you just had to go to the bathroom, sat back down. He wait five minutes. Ten. No sign of you. Grillby walked past and Sans caught his attention, nodding to the empty seat beside him. Grillby's gaze grew oddly closed off and... frustrated? He pointed to the door, then turned back to the mugs in need of cleaning. 

He listened as he heard Sans huff in disbelief then storm out. He felt he should have said something, but it wasn't truly his place. Sans hadn't asked for advice, just for hint of where you were. As soon as the skeleton disappeared out the door, the flame monster turned and gave the rabbit still seated a glare.

"What? He'll be much happier once they're gone, anyway. I'm just helping speed things along."

"Keep this up and I will not hesitate to fire you."

The rabbit opted to ignore him.

 

You were seated on your bed, going through a box of photos, when you heard the front door open loudly. Sans called your name, sounding frustrated and angry. You answered that were in your room, putting down the picture of Rob and picking up one of you as a child.

Luka, sitting anxiously on the floor by your knee, looked up in surprise when Sans loomed in the doorway, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"so. care to explain why i came back to resume my date and found no date there?" His voice was chilling. Yeah, he was mad.

"If you wanted to have a night out where you could sit and talk with your friends, I didn't want to weigh you down." Your own voice was slightly shaky at the edges, oddly nervous. You were still contemplating what Lily had said, turning it over in your head. 

He let out a long, exasperated breath. "i can't leave you for two minutes without you feeling left out, can i?"

"It wasn't just that." 

"enlighten me."

You took a deep breath, picking up a different picture. You hadn't looked up to meet his gaze yet. You were afraid you would crack if you did. "You seemed much more interested in talking to Lily then talking to me. If you wanted to go out just to have a chat with her, you could have left me out of it."

"you're still getting your knickers in a twist over her? for christ's sake." You heard a rustle and saw him move to cross his arms out of the corner of your eye. "if you actually put in the effort to get to know her, you'd realize how childish you're being. but i shouldn't have expected that, should i? no, no, obviously not. i must have forgotten; you don't put in any effort to socialize."

You couldn't think of anything to say. Your throat was tight and your heart felt like there was an enormous fist gripped around it. When he realized you weren't going to answer, he continued.

"i'd really thought you'd gotten over this whole thing about 'social anxiety.'"

"... You say it like it's an illness." Your voice was low, slightly strangled. If he noticed, he didn't care.

"and you say it like its something you'll never get over. you put hardly any effort into working past it. i seriously thought you were getting over it by now."

"I-it-"

"'it doesn't work that way?'" Silence. A sigh. "you say a lot about how it doesn't work but never say how it specifically works, you ever noticed that? if you want us to help you get past it, you have to both help yourself and actually tell us how to help you, you know. you can't just keep hiding from the world like a scared little kid every time you get upset."

Silence. Your hands were shaking and you wanted to gasp for air but dare not make it obvious how hurt you were. The words, like thorns digging into your thoughts and flesh, began to rot and fester inside you, bring with them a stinging, ripping pain. You thought he understood. You thought he was supportive despite that. 

Obviously not. A few tears slipped from behind your eyelashes, pattering against the picture of a baby Luka and swirling the colors. Said dog was seemingly in a state of internal panic, unsure what to do. She was on her feet, glancing between you and Sans frantically. After a moment, she turned and directed her posture to stand in front of you the best she could, gaze fixing to rest on Sans. In her mind, he was now the threat; he was hurting you, and she wouldn't stand for it.

Sans stared at you, waiting for something, anything, in response, for several moments, then sighed out between his teeth with a roll of his eyes. "... can't believe this. plan a night for your lover and they throw a temper tantrum because they feel ignored. don't even have to guts to answer back. listen, the next time you wanna have a little episode, don't make it when i actually have plans. in fact, it'd just be best if you weren't around when you decide to be like this."

"... Okay." It was quiet, but surprisingly steady. 

"'okay?'" He seemed faintly surprised that you'd answered at all.

"Okay."

Silence. A huff, rustling as he turned away. 

"i'm going back to Grillby's." 

He disappeared down the hall and you heard the front door open and shut behind him. It was only then that you let yourself open the floodgates of turmoiling emotions churning inside you with a fury. Luka, letting her guard down, whined desperately as you weeped loudly into your hands. 

"Oh, Luka. Oh, baby girl. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry."

Back at Grillby's, Sans was only seated for but a few moments before he was suddenly lifted from his chair at the bar. He struggled a moment, then recognized the formidable bulk of Greater Dog holding him by the hood of his jacket, soon heading hastily for the table occupied by canine like monsters. Sans swung from his jaws, slack and limp and still angry.

"Sans, dear! We're so glad you're back." Dogerressa clasped her front paws together, smiling. After a moment, she cast a glance around. "... Where is your human?"

Sans, still suspended in the air, sneered slightly. "enjoying a quiet night home alone."

The dogs all blinked at him. 

"You two didn't get into an argument, did you?" Dogerressa sounded genuinely concerned, smile wilting and hands dropping into her lap. When Sans remained quiet, she put a paw to her face. "Oh, oh dear. I knew we should have said something."

"about what, my date walking out on me for no good reason?" Sans snorted out, and was promptly dropped with a thump. Greater Dog was frowning now.

"You can't be serious, Sans. We thought you were smarter then this." Dogami gave him an incredulous look from across the table. Sans just quirked an eyebrow, wanting nothing more then to grab a drink and forget this whole blasted thing.

"Oh, oh, I knew he didn't know, otherwise he would have said something himself!" Dogerressa looked ready to cry. Dogami quickly soothed her, Doggo instead picking up the conversation.

"I can't believe you just left them beside Lily like that. Like dropping a fish into a shark tank." The dog shook his head, dog biscuit between his teeth bobbing with the movement.

"don't tell me you guys are on their side about this whole thing with Lily."

"Of course we are!" Dogami snapped, looking shocked. "And here we thought you liked the human! What a dirty rotten thing to do, Sans, getting into a relationship just to tear them down. We thought you better then that."

The cogs of his brain screeched to a halt. "... what?"

"Don't act as if you don't know." Doggo sniffed, chewing lightly on the dog biscuit. "Everyone knows how Lily's felt about humans ever since that one human lad had a falling out with her." 

His gaze flicked between the group. "i don't know what you're talking about."

"Lily has had a thing against humans ever since one of them... broke it off with her. She's been aiming to get your human to do the same to you for the longest time now. She thinks they're all worthless garbage and that you'd be better off without them by your side." Dogerressa sniffed, Dogami rubbing her back soothingly. 

"You seriously didn't know this?" Doggo shot Sans a disbelieving look.

"... no. are you guys sure-?"

"Sans, you're back! Where's your date?"

Speak of the devil. Lily looped an arm around one of Sans', dragging him back to the bar. He went without much resistance. He still didn't believe it, not entirely. He'd known Lily so long. To admit his judgement of her behavior had been so far off... It would wound his pride, as much as he hated to admit it.

"at home."

"I thought you said you had plans!" The rabbit sat casually in the seat beside him, watching with what almost looked like feigned curiosity and confusion. From the corner of his eye, Sans spotted the table of guard dogs exchanging looks and tuning in.

"yeah, that's not happening."

"Aw, shucks. What kind of jerk just up and leaves their date like that? Humans." The rabbit shook her head as if exasperated. 

Sans was listening and watching very carefully, suspicions growing. 

She slid a look in his direction, very careful and casual. "You know." She shrugged, closing her eyes. "You should just forget about that human."

"what?" Everything was falling into place, and he was still stalled by the more or less confession.

"I'm serious, forget about them and stick to monsters instead. You deserve a lot better then some lousy human like them, always making excuses and absolutely spineless." The rabbit sniffed as if disgusted, but the next moment was sent skidding across the room by a faint, blue glow.

"do not talk about them that way." Sans stood, glowering at the rabbit now supporting herself against a table, shock written all over her face. "now, if you'll excuse me, i've got someone to return home to." With that, he turned and stormed out yet again, earning approving glances from the dogs.

Realization of what had happened- had been happening for weeks now, what had just happened, and what had happened back at the house- hit him like a truck and he quickly blipped into the foyer, stopping to listen for signs of you.

Silence. The sound of Luka pacing the floor, paw pads and metal leg clicking in rhythm. 

"... babe?" 

No response. Luka's pacing stopped. 

He barged into the living room, worriedly looking around. Luka was watching him from across the room, eyes sharp. Luka was still here. Surely, you were too. He approached the dog with a swell of hope rising in his gaze.

"hey there girl. you know where my baby's at?" 

He extended a hand to the her and just quickly snapped it away. Her hackles rose and lips curled as she backed away a step, eyes watching him coldly. Her tail raised stiffly and her legs became rigged. Everything about her communicated that she now regarded him as the enemy, of which she had few.

Of course. What had he expected? He'd hurt you, and Luka had realized it. 

Flinching as if slapped across the face, he quickly turned away and called for you again. No response. He headed for your room hastily, soon registering that Luka was following carefully behind. 

Your room, while looking slightly more disheveled then he'd last seen it, was empty. A few pictures on the shelf of your bookshelf were turned over, face down. A few were gone. Your dresser drawers were open, and it was obvious some clothes had been pulled out. A few knick knacks were missing. It was very... unsettling. 

Also a major slap to the face. A jolt back to reality.

He'd scared you off. Encouraged you to take Lily's advice and get out of his life. But that was never what he'd wanted. He wanted your with him, happy and worry free and loved. He wanted you to learn how to have a good time without having to dissolve into anxiety. He wanted you to feel... normal. 

It was obvious you never felt 100% comfortable in most social situations. For a while, he thought you were just stubborn, then he'd realized it ran deeper and made it his mission to help you out of it. His understanding of it wasn't exactly perfect, and after a while, he'd gone back to square one and thought you were just being stubborn. Whether or not that was true, he had driven you away when that was never what he wanted.

Luka was watching him from the doorway. It was as if she was saying 'Do you see what you've done?'

Sans felt lost and broken and alone. Was this how you felt, even in a room full of people? It curled around his soul and, though it was pounding, it felt strangled and suffocated. 

He'd lost the one person he truly felt he loved.

"... do you know where they went?" He whispered out, raising his eyes to meet Luka's. She just watched him, eyes like flint. Sinking down to sit on your bed, his hand fumbled in his pocket for his phone. Your room smelled like you.

One ring. Two.

"Sup, nerdlord! How's it going with your bae?!" Undyne's voice came loudly over the speaker, making him cringe back as she laughed.

"are they with you?" No time for chit chat. He had to fix this.

"What...? No, I thought they were with you."

"shit. shit, shit, shit." He ran a hand over his skull, feeling tears of anguish and frustration bubble up in his eye sockets. Where were you?

"Sans? What the fuck is going on over there?"

He hesitated, then sighed. No use trying to hide it. "we got into an argument. i went to cool off at Grillby's and realized what was really going on, and when i came back to apologize they were gone."

"Gone?! How bad was this argument?!"

"... i thought they were just being stubborn about Lily and then using their social anxiety as an excuse. i thought they were over the anxiety thing, and-"

"You did what?! Dude, everyone knows Lily was trying to split you up! The fuck were you thinking?! I swear to god, if you used their anxiety against them, I'm personally going to rip you apart piece by boney-ass piece." Undyne was nearly shouting, snarling into the phone. 

He winced and couldn't think of a response.

"Oh. My. Fucking. God." Undyne was taking deep breaths, obviously trying to curb her temper.

"W-who're you talking to?" Alphys' voice drifted in.

"IS IT SANS AND THE HUMAN?" Papyrus', too. He winced. 

"It's a fucking dumbass, that's who it is! Sans, you get out there and apologize for being a piece of shit, or so help me..." Undyne's words faded into a deep growl. 

"what do you think i was asking where they were for? i'm already on my way."

"You better be."

"U-Undyne, what's going on?" 

Click. 

Sans stood, shakily at first. He took a deep breath, wiping any tears that may still be remaining, then turned to the door. Luka backed away and walked into the living room when he stepped out. There was only place he could think you would be, if you weren't with Undyne and Alphys. Well, a few, but one in particular.

She watched him as he put a hand on the doorknob, eyes calculating his every move. For a moment, their eyes locked. Then she snorted and lowered her head, hunching her shoulders. It was oddly threatening. 

Not only was Undyne promising to do him in, your dog was, too.

"i will. somehow, i'll... i'll fix this. for both our sakes." 

And like that, he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I completely erased the previous chapter and started from scratch but kept the same basic sequence of events. I even changed the conflict-character's name, just in case! Hope you like this one better! :)


	14. But you weren't

The walk to your former home- the house you had been planning to sell- was brief, but Sans felt like he couldn't get there fast enough. Walking down the driveway, he frantically searched for signs of life inside the building.

Yes, there- a faint glow behind the shut blinds. A lamp was on.

Relief was quickly crushed by the weight of his own mistake. You had felt he didn't want you around anymore, so you were seemingly planning on moving out. The thought made him feel hollow. More then anything, he wanted to hold you and tell you how sorry he was, all the ways he'd make it up to you, all the things he'd never do again.

He knocked on the door a few times, then rang the doorbell. Nothing stirred inside the house. The icy feeling gripping his soul strengthened. 

He knew where you were.

 

It was surprisingly cold out. But then, you hadn't planned on needing a jacket that night; normally, when you were out on nights like this, Sans stayed close enough that his heat rubbed off on you and if you were still cold, he gave you his jacket. 

You winced, a fresh wave of tears sliding down your freezing cheeks like molten metal.

Curled up there on the ground, it was also very dark. The moon cast everything in a silvery glow, making the skeletal stalks of what used to be bunches of blueish flowers look eerie. They shifted slightly in the breeze, tapping gently against each other in a very lonely sound. You reached out a hand to touch one and cringed at the tear-soaked sleeve, pulling it back and tucking it closer to your chest.

Your sweater, one of your favorites, was doing little to fend off the faint breeze slicing against your skin. The baggy, maroon colored sleeves fell over your hands, making you feel somewhat comforted.

The pain of betrayal was like a raw, salt-soaked wound, all over your heart and mind. Sans had comforted you, time and time again, saying he wasn't bothered by your shyness or nervousness in the slightest. He had said, time and time again, that he liked all your little quirks and found them cute and endearing. He had soothed you, time and time again, that he just wanted you to be happy and would help you each step of the way there. 

Hollow words. Meaningless. Said to placate you.

Tears stung your already tired eyes, making you sniffle. You had given up on wiping them away long ago.

Sans had said he'd never lied to you.

But that, in and of itself, was a lie.

Most of you said you were mainly hurt by the way he had talked about you and your anxiety, like it was an illness to shake off, a single hurdle to jump, something that could be cured, and you weren't trying to do any of those things in the slightest, making other people carry you all the way, instead. The other part said you were mainly hurt by the fact that he'd more or less admitted he'd lied to you, again and again, over and over, when you had trusted him.

Could you trust anyone the same way after that? Sans had felt like... your anchor. Your guide. The one keeping you grounded. And now, you were in some sort of pitiful limbo, unsure of what to do or who to turn to.

You'd contacted Rob shortly after locking yourself in your house, asking if he could pick you up. He'd asked where you were and what was going on. When you mentioned you and Sans had gotten into an argument, not thirty seconds later, he was calling you.

"What happened?" He'd demanded in that tone you knew so well, the one where he was restraining from doing something rash. You'd explained the best you could, tripping and stuttering over the words and back tracking, trying to keep it brief. When you'd admitted ghe things he'd said about you using your anxiety as a shield, there was a lot of rustling on the other end. "Give me an hour. I'm at work and I'll be out in half an hour and I'll floor it to your place." And then he'd hung up.

That hour was proving to be one of the longest of your life. 

The trees, looking very much dead in their winter hibernation, whispered to themselves as a breeze rustled their tops. Glancing up, you saw the moon cradled in the crook of one's branches, a big, silver eye, watching you. You'd used to think of it as Molly's, back after she'd first passed. Now, it just felt like an empty, soulless void, watching you struggle to keep yourself together in an amused way.

A hand suddenly fell on your shoulder, exposed to the air as your sweater bunched to one side. You lurched out of your thoughts in a sudden panic, quickly jolting to the side and rolling away. Hastily, you turned on the heels of your hands, looking up to see who had grabbed you.

"oh my god, you're freezing."

Sans stood there, eyes sockets wide and round, filled with... concern? He looked like he'd been crying, frown deep and stressed. He blinked down at you as if you were on your deathbed and he was trying to conjure up last minute ideas on how to save you. In a way, it reminded of those nights he had nightmares and came to your room to sleep in your bed. 

Your heart ached, a stabbing throb. You quickly glanced away and curled up again, knees close to your chest.

"I'll... I'll be by to pick up the rest of my stuff in the morning." The words were quiet and raspy with your sobs, wobbling at the edges. You thought you saw him cringe out of the corner of your eye.

"no! no, that's... that's not what i came here about." He seemed to contemplate taking a step forward, hands posed to do something. 

He took a small, inching move forward, reaching for you. Instinctively, you flinched and leaned away sharply, half expecting a sharp blow as you screwed your eyes shut and turned your face away slightly.

Sans could have cried. 

There was a long silence. He pulled away and you slowly, gradually relaxed. You cracked your eyes open and stared at him for a few moments, then glanced at the forget-me-nots. With a pained look flashing across your face, you struggled to your feet, muscles cramped from having been crouching for so long. 

"L-let's... let's not talk here. Please." You whispered out. Your hands found your upper arms, rubbing in a subconscious effort to warm the stiff muscles. You wouldn't look up to meet his gaze. You were afraid of what you'd find there. Anger. Frustration. Disappointment. 

More then anything, he was rolling in guilt and shame.

The walk to your house was very quiet and awkward. Quiet because neither of you spoke, awkward because you didn't want to get too close to him and therefore had to push against the undergrowth on one half of the path. You were the one to push the gate open, he the one to close it gently behind. You were the first to step into the dark, slightly chilly living room, him close behind. You quickly drew away a few feet, standing beside the chair you'd dropped your bag in. He frowned pitifully after you, extending his arms to you as if to hug you and moving to take a step forward. He stopped when you stiffened and shuffled backwards. 

"babe." He whispered out, sounding strangled and desperate. "sweetheart. please, i-"

Confused and somehow hurt and angered by his attempts to talk to you the way he used to, you frowned and scowled slightly. "... Sweetheart?"

He stopped, arms falling slightly. "yes. i've... i've always called you that. ever since we got together." 

"I... I thought we weren't together anymore."

He flinched, retracting his arms. "no, i-"

"You made it pretty clear you were tired of me being around and weighing you down when you wanted to have a good time with your friends." You looked away, scowl deepening. How dare he assume everything would be okay if he just called you sweet names again.

"no, no, i didn't mean that! you were right, i should have listened to what you said about her..." He looked ready to cry. As far as you knew, those were crocodile tears.

"Obviously you trusted her more then you trusted me since you didn't listen, not even once. It's nice to see you've decided to open your eyes now that you've already..." What was the right word to use? Hurt you? Lashed out? Broken your trust? Ruined everything? Tears came back, fierce as before.

"i... i was an idiot. i didn't want to admit that my judgement had been wrong because... it would have hurt my pride." He winced, grimacing as if pained by the memory.

"Wonderful. So you're more ready to hurt me then your pride. Good to know." You furiously tried to wipe away the tears, but as soon as you did, more would appear. Shouldn't the human body run out of tears at some point?

"sweetheart, sweetheart, please." He was openly pleading now, and took a slow, careful step forward. He lifted his arms again, expression softening. "i never meant to hurt you."

"It certainly feels like you did." You whispered out, burying your face in your hands and breaking a full-fledged sob. "Sans, I... I don't understand. I just don't understand." Your shoulders shook as you tried to strangle the noises escaping from your throat. Sans had done this to you. The thought hurt like teeth and claws tearing him apart. 

"i wasn't thinking. i was an idiot. i was a numbskull, boneheaded, a dumb bastard. i would never hurt you on purpose." He came closer, hands so close to you now, he could practically feel you shaking. 

"... Did you mean what you said, Sans? Did you mean all that? The truth always comes out when people are angry... Did you mean that?" You whispered out, still hiding in your hands as your body shuddered.

"no, no, no, i wasn't thinking, i was pulling excuses for myself out of the air, i never meant a word of it." Another step and he would be able to pull you into him, hold you close and sooth your tears and mend the tear he had made in your trust and fix the giant mess he'd made-

The front door barged open, a large, disheveled male soon looming inside, looking as if he most certainly needed to shave. Sans' head lurched around to stare at the sudden intruder, not registering who it was for several moments. You were slow to drag your head up and look up blearily through your tears, blinking as you realized who it was.

The man's eyes sharpened on the scene, soon narrowing to slits as he took it in: you, hunched in on yourself and crying into your palms, the skeleton, who'd hurt you and broken your fragile trust, reaching out as if to mend the bond with sweet nothings. His lips drew up in a snarl and, before Sans had fully come to his senses, was striding into the room with purpose.

Sans barely had time to dodge out of the way of the fist swung his way, staggering back. Disoriented and caught off guard, he wasn't able to duck out of the way in time to miss the hand closing in on the front of his hoodie. He prepared to defend himself, eye flickering briefly before snuffing out as he was flung backward a few feet, away from you. 

Rob stood between him and you, shoulders squared. He advanced and got into Sans' space, glaring fierce enough to kill a lesser man. 

"Is this some kind of sick game you play, making yourself look like a cool guy just to shove it all back in their face? Fucking god damn bastard, had them thinking you were trustworthy, thinking you were worthy of all the nice shit they said about you." 

He turned away, turning to you. You blinked at him, dazed.

"Come on. We're getting you out of here." Rob proceeded to scoop up your bag and put it over his shoulder, nodding you toward the door.

"hey, wait-" 

"Get out of here, before I have to sweep you off the floor." Your brother quickly rounded on the skeleton as he turned to reach for you, raising a fist. The skeleton blanched and pulled away again. 

"Rob, please." You whispered, feeling like a lost child in the midst of chaos. He turned back to you with a surprisingly soft gaze, putting a hand on your shoulder and pulling you into a one-armed embrace. 

"Come on. Let's get you to my place until this whole thing is sorted out." He gave a reassuring squeeze, pulling you toward the door. You looked over your shoulder, back at the living room. Sans was standing there, looking after you with a pleading gaze as if begging you to turn back and come to him. Your eyes locked with his, confused and hurt and red with tears.

He waited, hoping with his entire being that you would turn and agree to go home with him. 

You waited for him to say something, ask for you to please come home. 

When neither of those things happened, you turned back to look forward and slid into the passengers seat of your older siblings car. Sans stood in the doorway of your house, watching you with an increasingly scared and hopeless look on his face. 

Then, you were driving away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It'll get better,,,,,,,, eventually,,
> 
> Have more angst


	15. Too much to handle

When Sans returned home a few long minutes after watching your brother drive away with you, he was surprised to see Undyne's car parked outside. He went slowly up the steps, then pushed the door open. Three pairs of eyes settled on him sharply, one looking disappointed, two absolutely burning with fury.

Though Undyne looked ready to kill, spear in hand, it was Alphys who stormed up to him, poking a claw into his ribs sharply as she raised her voice.

"How dare you try to use something they can't help or control against them! How dare you side with the monster trying to drive them away! How dare you take it out on them as if they were the one at fault!" She was practically yelling and it stunned him into silence. "Don't you have anything to say for yourself?!"

"i... i fucked up." He finally said, giving in and letting his head and shoulders droop.

"You better believe you did. So help me, Sans, if you were anyone else I would let Undyne kill you right now!" Alphys huffed, crossing her arms. "... Where are they?"

A long pause. Sans sniffed, tears threatening to spill over. "they... they're with their brother because they think i don't want them any more."

"Serves you right!" Undyne snarled, gripping the blue spear so hard it snapped. "You better have at least fucking apologized."

"i did, but they didn't believe me."

Alphys sighed, now looking sad and worried. Probably for you, not for him. "Get in here and sit down. We have to talk about this before we do anything."

And so, Sans was isolated on the love seat as Undyne paced up and down and Alphys and Papyrus sat on the couch. Luka was curled around Specter in the middle of the floor, glaring at Sans as she growled protectively every so often. Specter looked anxious, eyes round and fur fluffed up in a rim around his head.

Sans tried to catch Papyrus' eye. His brother stared down at his hands in his lap.

"Sans." Alphys sighed out, dragging a hand across her muzzle. "What exactly did you say about their anxiety?"

He winced. "i... i said they weren't trying to help themselves. that they weren't putting in any effort to get past it."

Alphys shot him a disbelieving look. "You don't seriously think it's something you can just 'get over,' do you?"

Part of him was faintly confused. "is it... not?"

Undyne chucked the glass she'd been drinking water from against the floor. It shattered loudly as Alphys shot her girlfriend a look.

"Of course it isn't, you fucking idiot!" Undyne snapped, crossing her arms and snarling in an attempt to curb her anger.

"No, you can't just 'get over' or 'get past' social anxiety, or any anxiety. It's built into your brain, Sans. It literally affects the way you feel and perceive the world without your control. The best you can do is learn to cope with it." Alphys said slowly, looking at him from over the rims of her glasses. "Its... It's like depression. Once you have it, it never really goes away. It can die down at times, but it's always... there. You can't 'shake it off.' It's not that easy. It's never that easy."

It sank in. Horror of what he'd said crept in and gripped his soul.

"shit. how was i supposed to know?" He leaned forward, clutching his skull between his hands.

"Fucking care enough to look into it, for one thing!" Undyne suddenly snapped, rounding on him. "If I care enough about Alphys to study up on what's going inside her head, you should care enough about them to do the same if you actually love them!" She raised a fist, spear materializing. She held it there for a moment, then snorted and it disappeared as she lowered her arm and started pacing again.

"i just... wanted to help them and got frustrated when i wasn't. i didn't... i didn't mean for this." Sans grimaced, eyes finding Luka's. Her gaze was unreadable, but oddly he found he understood what he thought she was trying to say:

"Doesn't this feel familiar?"

And it did. He remembered the first time he'd lashed out at you for feeling the symptoms of your anxiety; he'd tried to get you to socialize with and befriend his own friends- Alphys and Undyne. You, at the time, hadn't told him about why you were so 'shy.' It had ended poorly: You had felt overwhelmed and turned in on yourself and he took it as you being stuck up on purpose and more or less attacked you for it. He'd made you cry. He'd thought he understood after you explained why you had acted the way you'd acted. It was obvious he hadn't.

"Then... What had you meant for?"

He jolted out of his thoughts. His head snapped up, eyes finding Papyrus'. It was the first thing his sibling had said to him since the whole mess started. He looked both sad and... faintly confused. It was a genuine question.

What /had/ he meant to happen?

"i... i don't know." He buried his head back into his hands. "i was angry. i... i meant for us to have a good time. when it didn't happen, i wanted... to take it out on something, and they were the closest target. i messed up." He lifted his head again, looking at the rag tag group in front of him. With you missing, it made it feel... very disjointed. "i'm sorry."

"Messed up is an understatement." Undyne grumbled under her breath and he saw her gaze flicker to Luka, curled up on the floor away from everyone.

"... At least you realize you've done wrong." Papyrus whispered out, sprinkling a pinch of food into the tank of a very agitated Charlie. Charlie was swimming frantically back and forth almost as if he was looking for something. He ignored the food entirely.

"just... please, help me find a way to fix it."

The group exchanged glances.

Alphys was the first to speak up. "It won't be easy. Saying things like that... It really messes you up. Even if they forgive you, even if you get back together, it might not be the same. Maybe not ever."

He winced. "i'm okay with that. i just want them back. i don't want me to be the reason we all lose them."

"I guess the first thing to do would be to catch them at a calm time and talk to them. Talk about what happened, explain your reasonings, but also explain that you know what did and said was wrong and you're ready to try and mend the mistake."

"i'd go through hell and back right now, so long as it meant things were okay."

 

The drive to your sibling's house was quiet. He led you inside without a word, handing you your bag and then making a beeline for the kitchen. There was a lot of clinking, then the sound of his voice drifted through. A few minutes later, he came back with two mugs of coffee and passed one to you. You took it gratefully, though it severely the lacked the taste of cinnamon and butterscotch you loved so much.

A few minutes later, the doorbell rang. Rob stood and answered it. He came back with a pizza box, placing it on the coffee table, disappearing into the kitchen and returning with two plates.

It was the way you'd liked it as a little kid. Lots of cheese. It felt like cardboard in your mouth.

You sat, side by side, for a long time after you stopped eating. It was late. He stood and returned with an armful of pillows of blankets and spread them over the couch. He sat beside you again when he was done. 

"You got work in the morning?"

"Yes."

"Call in sick."

"No. I... I don't want to just sit around feeling sorry for myself. I want something to do."

He was very reluctant. It took several minutes for you to convince him, and even then he insisted on making you go in late, making sure you got enough sleep. When you called your boss to let him know, he snatched the phone away.

"Hey. Yeah, this is their brother, Rob. They're... They're gonna be coming in late tomorrow. That's all you need to know." And then he hung up and passed your phone back to you.

"You could have told him. He's like a friend."

All he did was grunt. "... Get some sleep. If you need anything, come find me." He moved to stand when you caught his arm. 

"Wait. Please, don't... leave." You had trouble voicing what you wanted. He seemed to understand anyway. He sat back down. 

"Bathroom's second door on the left. I'll be here when you get back."

You took a quick, tiring shower and slipped into pajamas. He rubbed your back as you lied across the couch, not leaving until he was sure you were asleep. Everything felt as if it wasn't real. A dream. Nightmare.

Your sleep was troubled. It felt as if someone was reaching for you every time you turned around, but all you could see was an empty black void. You tossed and turned, waking groggy. 

Your phone had several messages left on it. 

"Hey, dude, we heard what happened with Sans. We already chewed him out for it, but just know we're on your side about this whole thing, alright? Come by and see us sometime. We want to make sure you're okay." That was Undyne. 

"Human... I heard of what happened. I hope you know that I would be more then willing to spend time with you if you so desired. If not, I can understand that as well. I would... be also more then willing to perhaps make you spaghetti. If you so wished. I will... talk to you later?" Papyrus, sounding both sad and... Something else. Something you couldn't name. A form of confused.

"Dearest human, Alphys informed of what occurred between you and Sans and I send my sympathies. If you so wish, you may join Frisk and I for some butterscotch and cinnamon pie tomorrow evening. I am always ready to listen." Toriel, too. 

It made you smile, the thought of seeing Toriel. Yes, that would be nice. You'd have to call her after work. You told your brother you'd be going to see a motherly friend after work tomorrow. He nodded, seemingly understanding your desire to see such a figure.

He fixed you a quick breakfast, then made you hop in his car so he could drive you to the pet store, not willing to let you walk.

It was a very quiet drive. Neither of you were sure what to say and opted to say nothing instead. As he pulled into the parking lot, he reminded you he'd be by to pick you up when your shift ended and call him whenever that was. Suddenly, he slammed on the breaks. You noticed his grip on the steering wheel tighten, knuckles turning white. It took you a moment to figure out why.

Sans was leaning against the wall beside the door, seemingly waiting for something. It seemed he hadn't noticed you yet; his eye sockets were black and empty and it looked as if he'd fallen asleep standing up, but you could see the dark lines under his eyes from here.

For a moment, no one moved. 

"It's... It's okay. I can't run away forever. It's fine. I'll just go in." You made a move to get out of the car and your brother stiffened, teeth grinding together.

"No! I'm not letting that bastard fuck you up, alright? People who say shit like that are toxic and don't deserve to be let near anyone, let alone you." A pause. "Call your boss for me."

"What? Why?" You were too tired and emotionally drained to keep up.

"Just do it."

You sluggishly pulled your phone out and tapped the number in. It rang once. Twice. Three times.

"Richard speaking."

"Hey, boss-"

Rob snatched your phone again, putting it up to his own ear. "Hi, yeah, it's me again. I'm their brother, Rob. Listen, my younger sibling is sitting here next to me fucked up and unsure who to trust any more and the guy responsible is standing outside. I'm thinking you know what to do."

He passed the phone back to you. Eesh, after all these years, he could still read you like a book. You hesitantly put the phone back to your ear. 

"... Boss."

"Is what he said true."

A long pause. "I... I guess." You felt yourself crumbling again, unsure what to say or do.

Click.

You looked down at your phone, confused. Your attention was drawn back up by movement at the doors. 

Your boss had quite literally stalked out, sleeves rolled up to his elbows and shoulders brought up to their full height. Your heart leapt to your throat. That could only mean one thing.

Sans blinked himself seemingly awake, turning his attention to the man advancing toward him menacingly. He seemed to brighten slightly and raised a hand in a half-wave, saying something you couldn't hear. He seemed... oddly hopeful. 

The next instant, panic and shock crossed his face as a fist barely missed the bridge of where his nose would be. He skidded backwards, raising his hands as sweat beaded on his brow, frantically saying something. Your boss just advanced closer, swinging for him again. And again. Sans seemed to refuse to fight back or use his magic on him, just barely sidestepping and flinching out of the way in time.

This wasn't what you wanted. You frantically turned to the car door, quickly yanking on the lock and swinging it open. Your brother barked out a "Wait!" behind you, fingers grazing your shoulder as you jumped out and ran, wobble-legged, to the scene. 

You quickly lunged in front of your boss. He stopped a fist and drew away slightly, but kept a burning glare focused on Sans. He made a move to go around you and you put your hands on his chest, pressing him back slightly. You could hear Sans heaving out breaths behind you. Your boss hadn't even broken a sweat. 

"Boss. Boss. Please. This isn't what I wanted. Don't hurt him just because... I can't take the truth." You pleaded with him, gaze boring into his. He kept his eyes locked on yours for several moments, then wrapped his arms around you, tucking his chin into your shoulder.

"... Okay. So long as you're here to witness it, I won't hurt him." He drew a deep breath. "... no matter how much he hurt you. Just know, whatever he said, there are people who care for you deeply." Then he pulled away. His eyes were oddly gentle and soft with emotion as he looked you over carefully before dipping his head once and returning back into the store.

You stood there for several long moments. This was proving to be a mess bigger then you could handle. You didn't want this. You never wanted this. 

Sans was watching your back from several feet away. It warmed his soul to see you still cared enough to protect him, but as he watched your shoulders slouch and head fall slightly, he couldn't help but want to hold you and sooth your pains away. He tried to catch your gaze as you turned around, but you kept your eyes down for a few moments. 

"... Sans, I'll... I'll be by to pick up my stuff some time later this week, okay? I'm... sorry for this."

For what? Your boss nearly dusting him, or having to move out? Even you weren't sure. Not entirely.

"please. i just want to talk." He was aware of your sibling, watching from several feet away, tense and ready to spring. He didn't make a move towards you, but pleaded with his eyes when you finally looked up. 

"... Not here. Not now." And then you had turned away and disappeared into the store. Slipped from his grasp once more. He could have cried all over again.

Your brother tracked you with his eyes until he couldn't see you anymore. Then he turned to the skeleton, slouching defeatedly with his hands in his pockets. It took Sans a moment to realize the man was looking at him, and blinked, waiting to be attacked for the third time in twenty four hours. Nothing happened. 

"... You want to talk, pal?" Rob finally sneered out, scowling down at the shorter figure. "Then you can talk to me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is mostly here for plot purposes. I pretty much half-assed it, tbh. Forgive me.


	16. Brothers to brothers

Sans was surprised by the change in your brother as they walked down the street, side by side. As soon as they were away from direct contact with you, his anger had ebbed to be replaced by something else. While Sans couldn't get a good read on the hard and slightly closed off face, he couldn't deny how he looked.

Tired.

The lines around his eyes and tracing his forehead and frown were unmistakable. It made him look surprisingly... old. The signs of uncertainty and concern were there, too, making it even worse. Shadows were traceable under his eyes as if he hadn't slept right in a long time. It had been harder to notice when he was glaring a hole into Sans' head.

Rob led him to a very familiar cafe, not bothering to hold the door for him as he walked inside. He slid into a booth, then nodded for Sans to sit across from him. For a while, neither of them spoke. Rob just studied Sans and Sans studied him right back.

"Listen, pal." Rob eventually sighed out, sitting back to slouch against the seat. "I don't wanna believe you're bad guy. They spoke pretty highly of ya, ya know that? Nothing but good things. And, hey, I wanna believe my little sibling's got enough of a read on people to know whether or not someone deserves that or not. They always did before." 

A falter here. Then he continued.

"But, hey. The worlds full of schmucks. People who go out of their way to pretend to be good people just to use it against anyone who happens to fall for it. People like that can be real smart psychopaths. Real clever. I should know." 

He closed his eyes, then opened them again, focusing on Sans. Sans was surprised by the lack of anything loathe fueled there.

"You sounded genuine. I only knew half the story, didn't really have enough information to make judgement, but I wanted to think you were good guy, alright? But, hey. Put yourself in my shoes. You've gotta younger brother, right?" 

"yes, Papyrus." Sans was somewhat uncertain as to where this was going, but he felt the need to play along. It was part of the process.

"Alright. So, okay, imagine he calls you in the middle of the night crying, alright? When you ask what's going on, he says someone he trusted and considered close to his heart started calling him out on things he couldn't control. How would that make you feel? How would you react to that?"

"... i'd be pissed as all hell." Sans sighed out.

"Yeah."

Another long pause.

"Listen. I don't want to think you're a bad guy. I've only got as much as they were able to say while they were bawling their eyes out over the phone. I'm giving you a chance to either admit you're not worth the space you take up, or give me a damn good explanation as to what happened. Alright?"

"okay."

"Start whenever. I've got time."

And so he did. He admitted that he was known for his judge of character, that he'd known the monster that was trying to drive you away for a long time, that he had said some terrible things in an attempt to cover up his own mistakes, that he was loathe to admit he'd made a bad read of the situation because he didn't want to wound his reputation, his pride, that his understanding of your anxiety was skewed and entirely wrong. For a long time after he had finished, it was quiet. Then Rob sighed, nodding slightly, yet not looking at Sans.

"Looks like we've got that in common, then." He said, more to himself then to the skeleton.

"... have what in common?"

"Pride. And it ending up hurting them." He leaned forward, putting his elbows on the table. "Soon as I got out of high school, I started smoking. Thought it made me look cooler. Older. Now, I dunno what the monster equivalent would be, but smoking fucks humans up. Kills ya slowly, in a way. Look up lung cancer some time." 

He closed his eyes, taking a breath.

"By the time I realized how immature I was being, to stop would be like admitting I'd made a mistake and hurt my pride. So I kept doing it. They got upset and fed up one day and tried to talk me down and force me to stop. I got angry and lashed out at them. That was a few years ago. We've only made up recently because I told them I didn't want them in my life if they were going to mother me and they took it to heart."

A long silence. 

"i'm... sorry."

"Yeah, me too." 

More quiet.

"You're not the only one that doesn't get it, ya know. I still have trouble getting it."

It took Sans a moment to realize he was talking about your anxiety.

"The best I've got is that it ain't a barrier to get past. It's a burden to carry. Sure, having people that understand help carry some of the weight helps, but they're the one that has to really deal with it in the long run."

"i get that now."

"Alright."

More silence. The burly male was scrutinizing Sans again and proceeded to do so for several moments.

"Listen. Pal. They cared about you a lot. They're... messed up. Locked up in their own head all over again. I'll give you one chance to fix this, one chance to make things better again. You fix this, you make sure it never happens again, you get my respect. You fuck up again, I have to sweep you off the floor. You got me?"

Sans smiled, feeling better then he had in hours. "ive got you. thanks, bud."

"I'm keeping my eyes on you. Prove to me you deserve all the nice shit they said about you."

"i'd do anything to make them happy right now."

"Me too, pal." He watched your brother sigh, seemingly deflating with the action. "That's why I've got an idea I think you'd like to hear."

 

The next day had come, the work day had passed, and you were heading for Toriel's for some pie and a warm atmosphere. The thought brought a smile to your face and hastened your steps. It was nice out today, the sun partially hidden behind clouds and a calm breeze floating gently past.

It was Frisk who opened the door for you, looking sad, but smiling anyway. 

"Hey there, Frisk. How are you?"

They didn't sign anything, instead grabbing your hand and guiding you through the house. It was silly, but very kind all the same. It made you chuckle.

"Whoa, okay. Eager for pie?" 

They pulled you into the dining room, then quickly shot you a hopeful smile and disappeared into the kitchen. You gazed after them, confused, then looked up. Your mind immediately went blank.

Sans and Toriel were sitting close at the table, Toriel leaned close as if to say something quietly. He was smiling at her hopefully, eye sockets dark and tired but grateful. They looked up at the same time, Sans' eyes meeting yours in some form of relief and desperation, Toriel's in quiet, motherly care. She thought this was for the best, you realized.

She stood and smiled to you, guiding you numbly to your seat. A piece of warm butterscotch and cinnamon pie was already waiting for you, a glass of milk beside it. You didn't think you could eat it; you stomach was cramped and twisted into knots.

Without a word, Toriel left you alone with Sans and disappeared into the kitchen. 

You eventually slid your eyes up to meet his. He looked like he hadn't slept. His eyes were filled with... hope, maybe. Maybe he'd been crying. It made you feel bad, in a sense. You couldn't muster the thought to crush the feeling down.

"hey. i just want to talk."

You contemplated getting up and walking away. You still didn't know how to feel any more. About this. About him.

"... Okay."


	17. Reconciliation

For a while, neither of you knew what to say. 

You stared down at your hands, laid gently on the tabletop. Sans stared at you, noticing the dark lines under your eyes and faint redness around your eyelids, signs of your lack of sleep and tears. He winced.

Eventually, you spoke up.

"So... Was this Toriel's...?"

"no, it was..." Should he admit it was your brother's last stitch attempt at trying to make you happy? "it was mine. your brother and i talked and he mentioned you would be seeing Tori today..." He shrugged. "i hope you don't mind."

"No, it's okay. I was thinking about coming to see you myself some time soon anyway." You still hadn't looked up and were afraid to talk at a regular volume.

More quiet.

"I'm sorry." "i'm sorry."

You both looked up in surprise. Sans' expression changed to one of confusion.

"you shouldn't be sorry. i was the one that was at fault. i hurt you when i should have heard you out."

"No, I should have just... been more assertive. Communicated better. Once I thought about it, I realized you were right. I should have stood up for myself rather then acting like a helpless little kid about it. It wasn't fair to you." You looked away, hands tightening their grip on each other.

"no, i was being an idiot! i was trying to cover my own mistakes by making up excuses for myself and used them against you. you were right. i should have listened. i shouldn't have been so caught up in myself. i'm sorry."

"You were right, though."

"no, i was a prick. i was hurting you when i should have just opened my eyes and stopped worrying about myself. i was wrong and it hurt you."

"I should have tried harder."

"you shouldn't have had to."

More silence.

"...could you ever forgive me?"

"I'm sorry, Sans. I... I overreacted. I should have tried to talk it out." Tears spilled over your eyelashes. "I'm sorry for all this trouble over something so stupid as me. I never wanted this."

"neither did i. please, don't be sorry." Sans soul was aching for you and he so wanted to wipe away your tears. But surely, you never wanted to be near him again, let alone be touched by him. His hands reflexively twitched anyway.

You lowered your head slightly. "Sans, I... I miss you. I already forgave you. I just... I miss you."

Sans could have cried with joy. You missed him. Did you still want to be with him? Was that even possible? He reached across the table, hand covering one of yours. It felt like it'd been so long since he'd touched you. "i miss you, too. do you... want to give this old skeleton one more try?" 

You looked up, meeting his eyes. He looked both very hopeful and very happy. Very relieved, too. Very afraid of rejection. "... Only if you'll have me."

Tears welled up in his eye sockets, smile broadening. "of course i will. i'd be more then happy to be with you." 

"I'm sorry, Sans. Thank you. I'll try harder." The tears came out heavier now. Before you knew what had happened, you were on the other side of the table and in Sans' arms. He tucked your head to his chest, one hand rubbing your back gently. While it took you a moment, you melted into the embrace, relaxing against him.

"shh. you're fine. i had just about everyone we know explain how anxiety works to me ten times over. i understand now and i won't use it against you anymore. i promise. i messed up and it'll never happen again. i'll make it up to you, i promise." He rested his head against yours, relieved you weren't disgusted by the embrace and shoving him away. While things certainly weren't fixed, it was clear it would get better.

Relaxed into his sturdy arms once again, you felt... better. Safe. Even if what he had said had hurt, it was clear he was willing to repent for it. It felt like it'd been so long since you'd been okay. The thought was silly, but it felt like it'd been... ages since he'd held you like this. Things were going to be alright. 

In the kitchen, Toriel and Frisk shared a high-five. 

Eventually, you pulled away from Sans and picked at your pie. While you didn't finish it, Toriel was kind enough to wrap up half a pie for you to take home. She gave you a kind, warm hug, giving Sans an encouraging smile over your shoulder. Then, she saw you off, waving from the door as you headed for the sidewalk.

"Is it... is it alright if I come home tonight?" You fiddled with your phone in your pocket, unsure.

"more then alright. Paps will be more then happy about it. he's been waiting to make you spaghetti ever since this whole mess started." Sans smiled at you comfortingly. Part of him wanted to hold your hand but he didn't want to push his luck.

"I should... call Rob." 

He nodded as you pulled your phone out, soon tapping in the numbers.

"Hey, you doin' alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine. Sans... We've made up and I want to get back to Luka tonight. Is that okay?"

"Sure thing. I'll drop off your stuff in the morning. You okay walking, or do you want me to pick you up?"

"I'm okay walking. Thank you."

"I'm just glad you're okay. He gives you any trouble, you call me, alright?"

"Alright, Rob. Thank you. Have a good night."

"Night."

Click.

Sans was watching you nervously as you tucked your phone away. "... okay?"

"Okay. Let's go home. I want to see Luka."

He smiled, relieved. "uh, yeah, i think she wants to see you, too. i've been living in fear in my own home the past two days."

"... Huh?"

"you'll see. come on."

He was right about Luka wanting to see you.

The second you stepped through the door, she was all over you, whining and licking and wagging her tail low. She pressed herself against you almost desperately, crying to you as you scratched at her back and ears and neck, fingers tangling in her fur.

"I'm okay, girl. I'm okay." You struggled to stay upright as she strained against you, metal leg clattering against the ground loudly. She faltered when she saw Sans standing close behind you, fur lifting slightly as she glanced between you questioningly. "He's okay, he's okay. It was all just a big misunderstanding." 

She seemed to visibly relax at that and, when Sans came up hesitantly closer, she greeted him with a slight wag of her tail. Though it was much better then her previous greetings, it was nothing like the way she used to frisk up to him happily. It would take time to earn her trust again.

"Human? Is that you?" 

Papyrus came out from the kitchen and, upon seeing you standing in the living room,broke into a happy grin and swept you into an embrace, rocking you back and forth.

"OH, HUMAN! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW GLAD I AM TO SEE YOU! HAVE YOU AND SANS... MADE UP?" 

He pulled back slightly, casting you a worried glance.

"Yes, Papyrus. Everything's okay. Or at least it will be. We've talked about it and we're... back together."

Papyrus nuzzled your cheek with his teeth affectionately, grinning again. It made you laugh. "I AM SO GLAD, HUMAN! I WAS SO WORRIED FOR YOU BOTH!"

"It's okay, Papyrus. We're okay." 

Your group settled down to watch a movie. Papyrus was quick to say it was alright when you admitted you didn't have much of an appetite; he would make apology spaghetti for breakfast in the morning. 

Papyrus dozed off at some point and, while Sans tucked him into bed, you got up to get a glass of water. When you returned, Sans was already seated. In the dark, illuminated by the TV, his eyes were large and round and... hopeful. He smiled, opening his arms to you. 

Should you be so quick to give in? He obviously had realized his mistake, but would it be right to forgive him just like that? Some part of you told you to be independent and strong. The other part desperately yearned for his comfort. You gave in to the latter, though hesitantly.

Lying in his arms, soon covered by a blanket, you felt more tired then you could ever remember being. His teeth brushed against your cheeks in a ghost of a kiss, tears glowing blue in his eye sockets. 

"i'm... i'm sorry about what i said. i'm so happy to have you back. you have no idea how happy you make me."

You nestled into the familiar smell of clean linen and old books that seemed forever stuck to his hoodie, slipping into unconsciousness before you could think of something to say in response.

While your sleep was dreamless, a certain skeleton was still desperately attempting to reach you from the void.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh, I'm not exactly happy with the turn this took (the argument was never really planned, but I realized it needed to happen in order for the plot to move where I wanted it to) so if it feels rushed, that's why. I just want to get back to Sans and Reader doing couple things. (Keep in mind that if you don't like it, you can always imagine that more time has passed then what has been stated.) Yes, I will still be including aftershocks to the argument, but it will still quickly go back to fluff and filler as that's something I happen to like writing.
> 
> Sorry if it comes across badly. :P


	18. Sleep

Over the next few weeks, February changing to March, cold changing to cool to mellow, Sans quickly noticed the change in you. 

It started with you getting things done before he even knew they needed doing; chores you used to share- laundry, dishes, feeding the various animals- were now getting done by you alone. Where he used to make your lunch for you, you started doing it ahead of time so he didn't have to. Where Papyrus was inclined to clean up messes made via spaghetti making, you were on top of it before anyone had a chance to lift a finger. Where Sans used to walk with you to work and back, you started leaving before he could notice and going alone. Where you used to ask for affections- kisses on the cheek, hand holding, hugs, cuddling- you now never initiated, simply accepted when he offered himself.

At first, he thought it was you being distant. 

Then it evolved into different things. Where he used to go shopping with you, you started going alone. Where he used to order for the both of you at a given restaurant, you started ordering for yourself. Where you used to ask him to go and fetch someone to help you when you couldn't find something at the store, you started hunting down and talking to employees yourself. (You were stiff and awkward about it, coming across as aggressive at times; employees, previously thinking you were shy and quiet, were put off by the sudden change.)

It dawned on him. You were trying to be what he said you weren't: strong, assertive, independent. That in and of itself might not have been so bad if it wasn't for your barely masked discomfort in said situations and how quickly it tired you out.

It came to the point where, as soon as you got home, you would sit or lie down on the couch for several minutes- not sleeping, just... taking deep breaths. Resting. You would put your arm over your eyes, flat on your back, and Luka would come over and put her head beside your shoulder. You would stay like that for ten minutes or so, then sit up, give Luka a pet, then stand and resume your usual routine. You became more distracted, staring off into space for long periods of time. Even when he passed your room in the middle of the night, he noticed you tossing and turning in your sleep, troubled. 

While he wanted to comfort you, he didn't want to overstep your newer, cautious boundaries. While he wanted to say something, he could never think of what to say. "Hey, you don't need to do that, I was a dick to suggest you should"? No way would that end up anything other then awkward and uncomfortable for you both. You hadn't mentioned the argument since you'd gotten back together; it still felt like too fresh a wound, in a sense. So, only able to watch as your determination to be what you weren't made to be ate away at you, he waited for it to spill over.

 

It was very, very dark out. Luka was at the end of your bed, curled up in a ball; Specter was nestled up against her back. Everyone had gone to bed hours ago. It was quiet, the only sound being of crickets singing to each other outside. And yet, despite all that, you couldn't sleep. You rolled over, peering at your alarm clock.

2:47

You sighed, sitting up. Maybe a glass of water would help. Luka looked up as you stood, and you motioned for her to stay with a wave of your hand. She lowered her head reluctantly, eyes tracking you as you left the room.

You checked on Papyrus, cracking his door open. He was curled up as ever, much like a cat, sound asleep. Then you checked on Sans. His door was slightly ajar, so all you had to do was peer into the darkness. He was sprawled across the blankets, face pushed snugly into his pillow. Oddly enough, that didn't look like one his pillows; in fact, it looked a lot more like one of yours. Funny, one of your pillows had changed into one that reminded of his- it even smelled of his sheets: faintly of food, mostly of books. Weird.

With that done, you headed for the kitchen.

You quietly pulled a glass down, filling it halfway with water, only to pour most of it down the drain. The water had done nothing. You were still tired, yet wide awake.

Maybe some fresh air would do.

You, still pajama clad, slipped your shoes on and slipped as quietly as you could manage out the door. You would walk to the park, sit for a minute, then come back. No one ever had to know. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them. 

It was faintly cool, a breeze making trees and budding bushes throw odd shadows across the ground. In fact, some of the shadows seemed to almost be reaching for you, stretching phantom hands toward your shoes before you stepped away. 

The pond- spilling over a small waterfall that fed a wide, shallow creek- was whispering to itself as you came to your usual spot. The old, swinging bench swayed gently under your weight, creaking faintly on its old rusty chains. It reminded you of earlier times- Molly, Dusty and Tumble times. 

Since you didn't have a lot to do on days off back then, you'd come here much more often, to this exact spot. Somehow, it hadn't seemed like such an old swing, then. Not so sad. Not so forlorn.

A new weight made the bench sway again, drawing your attention. The shadows beside you had coagulated, thickening and drawing themselves into a familiar shape. A comforting, deformed face was casting you a concerned glance, disembodied hand coming up to touch your shoulder.

"Gaster." 

A series of sounds you understood to be 'What are you doing out here? It's late. You should be sleeping.' 

Your abilities to translate what he said were getting increasingly better, you noted. "I couldn't sleep. It feels like it's been a while, how are you?"

He just shook his head, pointing to you. It took you a moment to understand.

"I'm fine. Just... tired." 

'Don't lie to me. I know what happened.' That one took you a while to decipher. 

"Oh. About the fight?" He nodded, looking worried. "We're fine. I just... didn't try hard enough. That's all. He was right about what he said." You looked away. His hand found yours, oddly solid as it gave your hand a squeeze. 

For a while, you sat in the quiet, listening to the water lap gently at the shores several yards away.

"_________?" 

Sans' voice snapped you out of your daze. You turned to see him standing several feet away, looking worried out of his wits. 

"... Hi."

"what are you doing out here? it's... really late." He hurried forward, eyes- round and bright in the dark- scanning you as if looking for injuries. 

"I was talking to-" You turned to address the shadows beside you to find no one. "... nobody. I just... Couldn't sleep and wanted some air." You shrugged. "Sorry."

He let out a sigh of relief, but still looked worried as his eyes reopened. "we should get you home." 

"Okay." You stood up, wobbling slightly. "How did you know where to find me?" 

He came closer, hand carefully finding yours as the smell of ozone filled the air. "just a hunch." 

With a fizzling whir, you found yourself at the front door. Your legs, unprepared and already unsteady, quickly gave out beneath you. Sans caught you just before you hit the ground, panic flashing across his face to be replaced with worry. Without a word, he scooped you up and carried you inside. Your head was swirling too much for you to complain.

Instead of taking you to your room, he sat on the couch and cradled you to him for a long time. You could hear his ribs shudder every so often as he drew deep breaths, seemingly to calm himself. 

"... please, stop." He whispered into your hair at one point, sounding pained.

"Huh?" 

"stop doing this. forcing yourself to be 'independent' and 'strong.' please. it's doing more harm then good. it's hurting you. this isn't what i wanted. i just want /you/, no matter how you are, so long as you're happy. please, don't keep doing this. it's killing you. it's killing me." Something wet and warm dribbled through your hair and you realized he was crying. You pulled away and he looked at you pleadingly, tears slowly spilling from his eye sockets, glowing blue in the dark. You reached up and wiped them away, but he kept his eyes locked with yours the entire time. 

When you moved to pull your hand away, he grabbed it between his, not hard enough to hurt, but tightly enough so you couldn't pull it away. You had been hoping he hadn't noticed how hard you were trying, or how much it was tiring you out. You just wanted to prove you could be what other people naturally were. 

"please." Sans' hands found your face, eyes soft but serious, no give to them. His thumbs ghosted softly over the curves of your cheekbones.

"... Okay. I'm... I'm sorry. I just... I don't know." You fell slack again, wanting nothing more then to sleep. He hugged you to him tightly, teeth finding your cheeks and shoulder in brief, grateful kisses. 

"it's okay. just sleep." He whispered into your hair, soon relaxing to lie down on the couch, grip on you not lightening up. With a long, tired sigh, you obliged and slipped into unconsciousness.

Nearby, a shadow slipped in and out of sight, watching you with his son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next few chapters will be happy, I promise.


	19. Sans' Plan

The beginning of April had come, and with it, it brought a happier relationship for you and Sans. You had 'recovered' from the argument, the only signs of it lingering in your self consciousness flaring up with a vengeance every so often. Your trust in Sans' had been patched, but you had taken to asking if he was annoyed by your various antics much more often. 

Each time the response was the same, "not at all. trust me, i'd love you even if you were annoying. but you're not, so it makes me love you that much more." And each time, it made you blush.

Though you'd never say it out loud, you were afraid to say it back. Not the 'not annoying' thing, but the... love thing. It seemed big, for some reason. Like you'd be submitting yourself to him in much the same way getting intimate for the first time felt. You had a feeling he was waiting for you to say it back, especially since he'd been saying it much more often since you'd gotten back together.

Every time you felt like you should say it, you couldn't work up the nerve to. Every time you worked up the nerve, it either didn't seem appropriate or the confidence vanished as soon he looked at you. It was an awful loop.

One morning, you nearly had a heart attack when your alarm didn't go off and you woke up two hours late. You jolted upright, fully prepared to race off to work with some half convincing excuse when you noticed a small sticky note stuck to your alarm clock.

no, you're not going to work today  
go and take a long bath  
coffee should be ready by the time you're done   
;)

Well, that was obviously Sans' handwriting. He better have a good explanation for this, you thought to yourself even as you followed the notes advice and headed for the bathroom. Sneaky Sans or not, a bath sounded pretty good right about now.

A bath was made for you when you stepped onto the cold, tiled floor of the bathroom. It surprised you to find it was still warm, the bubbles floating on top smelling of vanilla and lavender. It was very nice of him to do. Very flattering.

Certainly very relaxing, too.

As you returned to your room, wrapped in your robe (freshly washed, it seemed), you were surprised to find your favorite sweater and jeans sitting on your bed, waiting for you. He'd even washed your favorite pair of socks. As you slipped them on, you were even more surprised to find they were still warm from the drier. It felt wonderful. Smelled wonderful, too. A long time ago, you'd told Sans you loved the clean smell of his clothes and he'd forever after only gotten one brand of detergent. 

Luka was waiting outside your door when you stepped out. She greeted you with a friendly sniff and a happy wag of her tail, then led the way into the living room, past Charlie's tank, beside which was a snoozing Specter, and into the dining room. Sans was sitting there, two mugs of coffee at hand.

He looked up as you came in, giving you a smile and sliding one of the coffee mugs in your direction as you sat down. 

"morning, sweetheart." He propped his elbow up on the table, cupping his chin in his hand as he looked across at you.

"Good morning. So, want to explain why I'm not going into work today?" You sipped your coffee, giving him a suspicious look.

"don't worry, i already called in sick for you." His grin broadened, eyes glowing with mischievous mirth.

"And why would that be?" You set your coffee down, crossing your arms as if you were mad. Truth be told, you didn't really want to go into work today, anyway. But, hey, you couldn't give in that easily, could you?

"remember how i said i had plans?" He blinked slowly at you as if you were something out of a dream, grin ever present.

Your stomach dropped and you looked away. "Yes, I remember."

"i figured today would be good day to do a rain check. what do you think? you willing to give it one last shot?" His expression softened, eyes searching yours.

You took a breath to calm your nerves. "I don't see why not. Where do we start?"

 

It turns out you started with a simple walk around town, Luka beside you on a leash. That already made you feel confident in trying again; in a way, it was as if Sans was saying 'here, let's do this to show I understand now.' It was very thoughtful. Very heartwarming.

You strolled casually up and down main street, window shopping around as Luka's metal leg drew attention from passerby's. Some people came up and asked about it- how it worked, if it was real, why it was there.

Sans was always the one to brush them off and see them on their way. His hand, tangled in yours, would return the squeeze you always gave it as a sign of appreciation. 

Luka was happy to be out and about with you, sniffing at curious things you passed, greeting strangers as if they were friends, and making children squeal every time she nudged them with her cold, wet nose. It was a delightful way to start a morning. 

You paused beside a store selling various sorts of winter gear, mostly coats and scarves, mittens and boots. Recently, you'd been longing for a scarf like Papyrus'. You weren't sure why. It was just an appealing thought. 

Sans, following your gaze, gave you a smile and led you inside. The workers inside greeted Luka with friendly smiles, which was a relief. You didn't want to ruin the day just by making some store owner mad at the prospect of dog hair. 

Sans released your hand brush a hand over a scarf display. "pick whatever you want. it's on me."

"Sans, that's ridiculous. I have money." You laughed, shaking your head as you looked through some.

"what kind of boyfriend would i be if i didn't you get you things you'd look cute in?" 

Several workers- some of whom were monsters, you realized- cooed over the comment, making you blush furiously. You quickly hid in a scarf, making Sans chuckle as he pressed his teeth to your cheek, which brought on another onslaught of 'Aws' and the like.

You eventually picked out a pale blue scarf, embroidered with little white swirls. It was lovely and plush to the touch, and the color reminded you of Sans. When you held it up to show him, he smiled broader and nodded.

"i was hoping you'd pick that one." 

He refused to let you pay for it, even as you hit his shoulder lightly for being so stubborn. As you stepped out of the store, Luka sneezing alongside you, Sans carefully removed the tag from the scarf, then threw it over your shoulders and wrapped it around your neck snuggly.

"looks great on you." He gave you a thumbs up, to which you responded by burying your lower face into the scarf. He just chuckled, grabbing your hand again and leading you on.

"So, what next?" You eventually asked, having sampled each and every confectionary shop on the street and exhausted all window shopping opportunities. 

He smiled, tugging on your hand and leading you into a copse of trees, out of sight. When you gave him a confused look as he lightly put a hand on Luka's head, he just winked at you, left eye igniting blue and yellow.

"i know a shortcut."

The next instant, you and Luka both were staggering in shock. Sans helped you right yourself, then soothed Luka until she had calmed down. You looked around in amazement, both startled and confused.

You were standing in an area very different from the one from moments before. Stretching to your left and right were snow covered evergreen trees, in front of you a small, cozy looking town, a sign off to the side reading "Welcome to Snowdin!" Above you, walls of stone rose in a arch to form a cave roof, stretching for what almost looked like miles above your head.

Sans came up beside you, hand finding yours. You turned to him, hand slack in his.

"Are we...?" You whispered out. It was very quiet and still, but the sound of rustled icicles came and went sounding much like a music box's tune. To break the silence seemed unthinkable.

"yep. this is the underground. where Paps and i came from, specifically." He was looking out over the old, abandoned town with an expression filled with fond memories. 

It was then you realized why Papyrus had been so excited for the snow; while not unbearably cold, there was snow everywhere, covering the ground in inches upon inches in some places. It was, truthfully, very beautiful. Very serene.

"Wow." You breathed out, stepping forward hesitantly. Sans walked on, leading you through a calm, empty series of houses and shops. It was obvious no one had been here in a while; the only tracks were left by you, Sans, and Luka. Luka seemed excited by the prospect of exploring new places, but you were afraid to let her go for fear of her getting lost in the unfamiliar environment.

Sans stopped you in front of a two story cottage, then led you up to the door. He drew an old key from his pocket, then unlocked the door and let you inside. While it was cold and dark inside, it still felt faintly familiar. The atmosphere, somehow, felt very... close to something you knew.

"Is this... Is this where you used to live?" 

Sans simply nodded, drawing his fingers across a table and studying the lines it left in the dust. "yup. it's been a while."

Luka, sniffing curiously around, nosed the couch then looked at Sans. It was clear she was making a connection just as you had, but through smell rather then feeling. 

Eventually, you left the empty shell of what used to be Sans' home. He led the way out of the last stretch of town, into a densely fogged area. When you got nervous- you could barely even see Sans' silhouette beside you- his hand found yours as you tightened your grip on Luka's leash. Eventually, the fog thinned and you saw you were heading for an opening in the cave wall.

Sans lead you through a winding path through a place with glowing pools of cerulean water and bioluminescent plants. Luka was entranced by the water and took every opportunity to jump into it and you swore she was admiring the way it glittered and glowed in her fur more then once. 

She would need a bath when you got home.

"This is where you came from?" You whispered at one point, listening to the different echo flowers as they chattered about finally getting to see the sun and breathing fresh air.

"yup." Sans watched you as you stooped and stuck your fingers in the water, watching it swirl around your finger tips. You looked wonderful in the glow of the blue waters and plants, he noted, smiling to himself.

"Wow. It's... amazing." You whispered, tilting your head up to look up at the ceiling high above. "It's beautiful." Luka, sitting beside you as you crouched beside the pool, sneezed in agreement, following your gaze.

While all these sights were old news to Sans, your tone alone convinced him you were telling the truth. He'd grown up seeing them; just because he was used to them didn't mean they weren't wonderful. In fact, it reminded him of when he would gawk over something above ground- the ocean, for one thing; he'd yet to see it, but you said it was like water as far as the eye could see- and you would brush it off as something ordinary. 

"if you think this is great, have i got a surprise for you." His smile broadened when you twisted your head to look at him, eyes big and round and eager.

"Oh?" You stood, walking up to stand beside him with Luka right beside you.

"close your eyes and trust me." 

Hesitantly, you complied and he got behind you, placing his hands over your eyes and gently leading you through the last few turns to the room that had been a personal favorite of his. He stopped in the middle of the expansive room, and slowly removed his hands, moving to stand beside you.

"alright. you can look. this is the wishing room."

You opened your eyes slowly, then gasped as they grew round and amazed again. You turned slowly around, staring up at the ceiling as if it was the greatest thing you'd ever seen. The small, glowing stones in the ceiling reflected in your hair and eyes as you stared up at the almost sky-like expanse above you.

"Is this... real?" You breathed out, hand holding Luka's leash slackening as Luka stood beside you, eyes much the same as yours.

"you bet. it was my favorite place in all of the underground. we used to come here to make wishes, like you guys do on real stars." He stuck his hands in his pockets, bittersweet memories washing over him. It was worth it to see you so awestruck.

"Why did you ever want to leave?" You whispered out, almost as if it wasn't meant for him. 

His eyes snapped to you as you ran a hand over one of the walls, thumbing one of the crystals. In that moment, you looked unreal.

"well, if you'd been here with me, it would've been a lot better."

It came out of his mouth before he could catch it and he quickly flushed a bright shade of blue, very visible in the dark. It only strengthened when you turned to look at him in surprise, then you broke into a quiet laugh. 

"Yeah, with you here, I think it's that much better, too." You gave him a warm smile and Luka wagged her tail against the stony ground, smiling as she ran out her tongue. 

He wished he brought a camera.

Eventually, he led you out onto the cliff facing the capital, where you promptly sat with your legs dangling over the edge, staring up at the silhouette of the city with another awestruck expression. He sat beside you, Luka on your other side. For a long time, it was very, very quiet. 

"Thank you, Sans." You eventually said, still looking out towards the city in the distance.

"your welcome. for what?" He gave you a questioning look.

You smiled, tapping your heals against the cliff face. "Showing me this place. Where you came from. I feel like I understand you guys a bit better now. I don't know why."

With a chuckle, he leaned over, laying one of his hands over the top of yours as he planted his teeth to your cheek. "well, thank you."

"For what?" You giggled out, cheeks turning pinker, much to his delight.

"being here with me. i don't think i would have had the courage to come back if you weren't with me." He leaned gently against you and you felt him give out a light sigh. For a while, neither of you said anything.

"... Does this place make you sad, Sans?" You eventually whispered, leaning your head against his.

"nah. not when you're with me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing but fluff yet again. Enjoy. Don't worry, the next few will be fluffy, too.


	20. A/N: I'm... worried.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

I have a real question for you guys. I'd appreciate honest answers more then anything.

Looking back at these two fics, I've been worried. Is my characterization of these characters bad? I've been mostly using a lot of my own interpretations and headcanons for their behavior, since there's not really a lot to go off of in the actual game; don't get me wrong, each character gets a chance to shine, but... There's only so much personality you can work into each of their five-minutes-of-fame. But, still, I need to ask, am I butchering the characters entirely? If I am, let me know. It's been bothering me.


	21. Above the ground, under the surface

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ,,, this is really long but it felt awkward whenever I tried to break it into two parts. Next one should be better.

"Sans." 

The sleeping skeleton grumbled, turning his face away slightly to bury into (what Sans had recently admitted was yours) the pillow his skull was resting on and his arms were hugging. You couldn't help but giggle, leaning closer from where you were crouched beside his bed. 

"Saaaaaans." You sang, breath brushing against the side of his face. 

He scrunched up his face slightly, making you chuckle. 

"Oh, Saaaaans." You promptly blew on his temple, making him jerk awake and sit upright. You broke into a laugh and he turned to give you a halfhearted frown. Part of your mind noted he was sleeping without a shirt on- his ribcage was visible for all to see- but you quickly crushed any flustered feelings that threatened to make you blush; today was too exciting! Too important!

You sprang to your feet, giving your still-groggy lover a grin. "Come on, sleepy bones! Toriel, Undyne, and Alphys will be here in an hour and a half! Double check your stuff and I'll be making you a cup of coffee!" 

With that, you bounced out of the room and down the hall, Luka frolicking right beside you. Yes, you'd been planning a mini-vacation for yourself and your friends- you'd leave this morning, be back tomorrow evening. Plain and simple. Of course, you were keeping where you were actually going a secret from Sans, while everyone else was in on it.

Sans wasn't very happy about that and had attempted to get Papyrus to crack more then once.

You and Papyrus' bags were already sitting by the door, ready to go. Luka would not be going with you- where you were going would not accept any dogs- so you had hired Rob to come by and make sure she, Specter and Charlie were all doing okay while you were gone. Everything was working out smoothly.

By the time you had finished the two mugs of coffee (one for you, one for Sans), Sans had shuffled into the living room, a simple bag on his shoulder. You gave him a happy smile and passed him his mug, which he accepted with a still-groggy smile.

How he could sleep so much and still be so tired, you... actually could relate to, you realized. 

"Come on, Sans, aren't you excited?"

"I AM!" Papyrus' voice came from his room, where he was no doubt wondering what outfit he should wear for the first part of the trip.

"it would be a lot easier to get excited if i knew where we were going." He snarked, narrowing his eye sockets at you over the rim of his coffee mug.

"Oh, lighten up, grumpy bones. Just trust me when I say you'll like it." You leaned over, planting a kiss to his forehead before snagging his bag off his shoulder to drop it by the rest of your stuff. You heard him chuckle behind you, his flustered, loving chuckle- one of your favorites. 

You sorted through everything again. All of you would be riding in Toriel's van, with you upfront for the first half of the trip until Toriel got her bearings, Sans and Papyrus just behind you, Frisk (with Flowey in their lap), Alphys and Undyne in the back. As you stopped for gas or snacks, everyone would shuffle around so that everyone got their share of time in whatever place in the vehicle. 

It would be interesting, that was for sure.

You would be booking a hotel for three rooms- one for you and the skelebros, one for Alphys and Undyne, and one for Toriel, Frisk and Flowey. You would each pay for your respective rooms, take out or fast food, and souvenirs. It was going to be fun, you were certain.

Plus, it might give you a chance to think over how you might say that big three word phrase to Sans. 

You were planning on doing it either today or tomorrow, nonchalantly, in passing, without much emphasis on it, as if it you'd been saying it all along, as if it wasn't a big deal, as if it wasn't making you shake in your shoes. You didn't want to be sappy, didn't want to have some grand build up to something so... insignificant. 

Didn't want to make it out to be as if it was as big a deal to him as it was to you.

Toriel showed up- Alphys and Undyne already on board- right on time, honking the horn excitedly. You and Papyrus both bounced out of the house, bags in hand, at the same time, waving excitedly. After dumping the stuff into the trunk, you trotted back to say your goodbyes to your fluffy children, lock the door and leave a key under the mat for Rob, and scoop Sans up under the arms to move him to the car faster (he was moving at a snails pace, and he wasn't very heavy, anyway; you were pretty sure he and Luka weighed about the same, despite his logic-defying pudge).

He fell slack in your arms, even as Toriel, Alphys and Undyne broke into laughs at the sight. You sat him the seat directly behind the passenger's seat up front, so you could easily turn and chat with him if you so desired. 

"Come on, lazy bones, buckle up."

"can't hear ya, i'm sleeping." He winked at you, then closed both his eyes. 

Toriel snickered as you shook your head good-naturedly, leaning over to buckle him in yourself. What? You couldn't have your verte-bae in danger like that. He nuzzled your cheek as you passed, which Flowey- in the back, on Frisk's lap- made loud, exaggerated grossed out noises at. Sans cracked an eye open to shoot him a look while you laughed at his childish behavior.

With that, you slid into the passengers seat beside Toriel and pulled out your phone, GPS already coordinated for your destinations.

"Oh, I am simply so excited, dear! I've never been to anything of the sort before." Toriel clapped her hands merrily, then put them back on the wheel. "... Have you told Sans yet?" She glanced into the rear view mirror, eyes crinkling with delight when said skeleton cracked his eyes open to give her a look.

"Nope. So everyone's gotta keep their mouths shut, okay? That means you, Flowey!"

"I make no promises."

"It means Sans is squirming over it the entire trip..."

"Okay, I promise."

You laughed when Sans grumbled something under his breath about 'no good weeds rubbing off on his verte-bae.' After a while, Toriel turned onto an interstate, and asked if you were sure you knew the way.

"I'm sure my phone does. I've already everything punched in, hold on. ... Yeah, see, we turn in fifteen miles. Don't worry, we'll be fine, Tori. I promise."

Noticing a glimpse of movement out of the corner of your eye, you quickly raised a hand to flick at it. Whatever you made contact with flinched away and you turned to see Sans giving you a grumpy frown. 

"Sorry, no peeking!"

He huffed. "i'm going to sleep. wake me when we get where ever we're going."

You laughed, reaching back to give his knee a comforting pat as he leaned back and started to doze.

 

Your gang arrived at the place without a hitch, if perhaps a few potty breaks along the way. Flowey (and everyone else, though Papyrus was very sweaty for the majority of the ride) had stayed true to his word and not told Sans what your destination was. Sans had dozed for half of the five hour drive, then started asking where you were going and when you would get there.

"Well, Sans, now you can finally know what we spent five hours in the car for."

"yeah, when we finally get there, how wonderful."

"Cheer up, grumpy, and be happy! Come on." You popped your car door open and slid out, everyone else shuffling after. "Welcome, my dearest, boniest friend, to the best aquarium this side of Mnt. Ebott!" You opened your arms as if you were going to embrace the large building in front of you as Frisk scampered around Toriel and Papyrus jumped jovially on his heals.

Sans stared at the building, obviously unsure as to how to feel, but with curious excitement flickering in his eyes. You'd yet to introduce him to various forms of sea life, so, while it was clear it'd be quite the experience, you figured this would be a nice place to start.

"My parents used to take Robbie and I here on special occasions, but it's been a while since we've been here. I hope they still have the giant whale skeleton."

"the giant what skeleton?" His eyes slid over to look at you questioningly.

You chuckled, looping your arm through one of Sans'. "Cmon, I'll show you."

As you paid for tickets and sidled your way onto the first floor of the place, you were sure to grab a few maps and pass them out to everyone in the group, even to Flowey.

"Okay, feel free to split up, but we meet back here at five, alright?"

"We gotcha!" And with that, Undyne charged excitedly for the path leading towards the shark tanks, Alphys in tow. 

"WILL DO, HUMAN! COME, FRISK! I WISH TO SEE THESE PRODUCERS OF JELLY!" And with that, Papyrus was off, Frisk following excitedly at his heels, Toriel chuckling behind. 

"Come on, Sans. I think the skeleton is..." You turned and walked up a short ramp that overlooked the main floor, then stopped and smiled. "Yes, it's still here! Look, Sans." You swept a hand to the large blue whale skeleton dangling from the ceiling on invisible wires. Even after all this time, it still took your breath away. You couldn't help the excited grin from breaking out across your face.

He stared at it, and you noticed his eyes trace over the ribs and spine. "... is that real?"

"You bet. I mean, it's a direct copy, but it's a direct copy of a real skeleton. Look, they've even got the little back leg remains!" You pointed them out, two knobby bones near the end of the torso of the skeleton.

"back leg remains?"

"Yeah, whales used to be dog things. Now, they're like fish, but... mammals."

"... looks like a fish skeleton to me."

"They breath air."

"they don't have gills?"

"Nope. They've got noses on top of their heads, basically, and can hold their breath for hours at a time, I think."

Sans looked both amazed and bewildered.

"I'll have to show you the dolphin tank. That should help."

"dolphins?"

"Like miniature whales. Come on, there's still squids, horseshoe crabs, jellyfish, sea horses, cuttlefish, sea turtles, sharks and star fish to get through! They might still even have eels and octopi." With that, you grabbed his hand and pulled him back down to the main floor, checking the map while he glanced around in hopes of preparing himself for whatever a cuttlefish was.

You brought him over to the open tanks first. You tugged him over to the stingrays first, telling him it was okay to dip your hands in the water- that was what the open tanks were for. These fish were all mostly harmless.

"These are stingrays. The only thing to look out for is the tail." You leaned over, lowering a hand into the water. "Aren't they amazing? Like underwater birds."

"where's the mouth?" He mimicked you, dipping a hand in to ghost the tips of his fingers over the slick back of one as it swam past. For something with seemingly no limbs beside it's thin tail, it glided through the water easily.

"On the underside. Just like the sharks they're related to. Looks pretty funny, doesn't it?" You smiled down at the graceful disks for a moment, then walked on. "Come on, these guys are some of my favorites."

"they look... weird."

"They're horseshoe crabs! Here, check this out!" You reached over and snagged one by its sides, lifting it clear of the water so he could see the lobster-like underside, insectoid legs wiggling. He kept his distance, watching the stomach plates shine as the salt water dribbled off of them. "Robbie used to love to tease me with them since their legs freaked me out. Come on, come over and pet one." 

He came carefully over as you lowered the odd crab back under the water, watching it seemingly slide away with its prickly-looking armor on its back. Their tails twitched as they moved along, and he found their shells to be surprisingly sturdy under his touch. 

Sea creatures were weird, he decided. If somewhat amazing.

"Come on, the starfish tank is over here. They shouldn't be so freaky." You walked over to another tank, this one with higher walls and looks of what seemed to outcroppings of coral creeping up the sides. He blinked in surprise when you reached over and plucked one up, revealing it to be a five-limbed awkward mass.

"those aren't plants?" He sidled over, brushing a finger along one of its limbs and feeling it twitch under his touch.

You laughed, turning it over in your hands. "Nope. But they're a pretty basic form of life, right next to sponges, I think. They move really slowly, using these suckers on the bottoms of their legs."

"weird."

"But cool?" You gave him an amused smile as you carefully placed the sea creature back in the tank alongside all the others.

"... but cool."

"Now, wanna do reefs first, or deep sea?" You opened your map. "Deep sea is pretty weird and kind of hard to explain, but I kind of want to save coral reefs for later." 

"deep sea it is, then." 

You broke into a smile, grabbing his hand. "Come on, this way, then. I like a lot of the deep sea guys. Jellyfish and cuttlefish especially. They look like they aren't even meant to be here. Aliens." You chuckled, tugging him through a small crowd, heading for an arch way labeled "DEEP SEA," the insides dark with blue light.

"Ooh, they do still have squids! Look, look!" You excitedly pulled away, stopping beside a tall pane of glass in one of the walls. Inside were a bunch of oblong shaped fish with large eyes and six tentacles, all floating gently around.

"squids?" He couldn't help but chuckle at the name, watching them push themselves around with gentle movements of their long, thin legs. 

"Yeah, aren't they cool? Did you know there's been evidence of giant ones living in waters so deep we haven't explored them yet?"

"how giant are we talking?" He studied one as it came up to study him right back, and you traced a finger around its shape.

"Like, twelve-feet-long-giant, I think."

"so... the kraken might be real."

"Pretty much."

"is it too late to go back underground?"

You laughed. "Sorry, pal, you're stuck with me."

You met up with Toriel, Frisk, Flowey and Papyrus beside the jellyfish tank and you continued through the deep sea tanks with them at your side. 

"Hey, Sans! Check these guys out, their some of my favorites!" You quickly glued yourself to the glass of a smaller tank, the gang coming up behind you to see what you had you so excited. "Cuttlefish are like alien fish. For some reason, they just make me so happy. They're kind of like squids, kind of not."

The seemingly tentacle-mustached sea creature glided along the sand, pausing to regard the group with a curious eye. Frisk waved at it and it continued its swimming after a moment. 

"it certainly does look like something else." Sans was intrigued by the variety of the creatures the world had to offer; in a way, he felt like the creatures of the sea had a lot in common with monsters. Trapped below the surface of the water, kept there because they simply weren't designed to live above it. He wondered if they ever felt locked in their watery prison.

Soon, the end of the winding deep sea exhibit was in sight. With a smile, you turned to Toriel. 

"Wanna join Sans and I as we check out the coral reef tank? It's... From what I've heard, it's something you'll never forget."

"Of course, dear."

"Come on, just follow my lead. They've added something to it since I was here last, and I can't wait to see what it's like!" With that, you grabbed Sans' hand and took off down a random pathway excitedly, giving him a bright smile that made him blush and return it.

A massive tank sat in what seemed to be the middle of the building, and you led the group over to an archway in its side. Sans was faintly confused- who would put a doorway in the side of tank?- until you led the way through it. Then, just inside, everyone stopped short to admire it.

A long, curving tunnel went under and through the middle of the tank, giving you a insiders view of the creatures inside. The light filtering inside was blue-green, speckled with reflected reds and yellows and violets as the shadows of corals, sponges and plants fell across the floor and the light reflected off the scaly, flashing hides of fish. As you slowly walked up to one of the arching walls, watching a school of yellow and green fish swim past, Sans realized how well the rainbow of colors filling the air suited you. He couldn't help but flush when you turned and gave a radiant smile.

It was strange, for a moment he almost thought he'd seen a familiar shadow at your side, cracked and deformed face tilted up to watch the sea life swim past in much the same way you had.

"Amazing, isn't it?" You asked and he couldn't help but smile adoringly as everyone else nodded, still entranced by the sight of a shark swimming directly overhead.

"you sure are." He breathed out, not noticing Toriel and Papyrus' heads snap to look at him. A moment later, he was drawn out of his thoughts by their muffled laughter. He flushed, shooting them looks as he shuffled up to stand up beside you. 

For a long time, you didn't move far from the entrance. You all just stood there, watching fish and sharks, sea snakes and octopi, even an eel, glide past on all sides. You pointed out what looked like a bunch of coral to Sans and told him to watch it. A moment later, he was surprised when an entire section of it broke away and turned into an eight-limbed octopus. You told him it was called a mimic octopus, for obvious reasons, and that it was marvel of science.

He believed you.

Sharks, squirrel fish, parrot fish, sea horses clinging to coral, striped sea snakes, sea cucumbers, hagfish, more who's names he couldn't remember all flooded his sense as you pointed them out, giving little facts about each of them. How you knew so much about everyone of the things that caught your eye astounded him. He could only dream of remembering all their names, let alone their little quirks. 

Suddenly, you gasped and pointed something out. "Look, their green sea turtle! Make a wish!" 

He caught sight of the mossy green shape as it slid through the water with a lot of grace for something that looked like an underwater tank. The next instant, it disappeared around an outcropping of coral. "wish?"

"Yes, they only have one and it's so rare to spot it, it's been a tradition for my family ever since our first visit. Of course, in those days we had to look from the outside walls and never actually saw it..." You smiled at some memory he wished he could see, too. 

"alright, i'll make a wish." He thought it over as you eventually started walking again, watching you point out some strange fish that kind of looked like it had Undyne's teeth and an awkwardly shaped head- a hammerhead shark, you said. 

After a while, you glanced over at him. "So, what did you wish for?"

"cant tell ya. that'd be breaking the rules." He nudged you, pointing out where Frisk and Flowey were intently watching a family of clown fish flicker in and out of an anemone. You laughed at the sight, squeezing his hand.

"So, was it worth the surprise?"

"worth it and more." 

You chuckled, nudging him with your shoulder as the end of the tunnel came into sight. "Ready to see the aquatic mammals?"

"ready as i'll ever be."

Sea lions had eyes and expressive mouths that almost reminded him of Luka. Seals, while similar, you said were an entirely different species. Otters almost looked like river cats. You brought him over to a section of the mammalian room where handfuls of people were having their pictures taken and pointed out the slick, smiling bodies behind the glass- Dolphins, you said. Sort of like miniature whales. They used to be dog like creatures, you said. 

It was hard to believe, watching them twist and turn to peer at him through the glass, and when you gave them a smile, they twittered in response.

"Watch this." You let go of his hand to cover your face, leaving cracks between your fingers so you could still see the bottle nose dolphins in the glass. 

He broke into a laugh when they twisted and turned in the water, seemingly trying to peer around your hands to see your face. A few swam away, then came back and clicked at you as they twirled in the water, tilting their heads at you. After a moment, you drew your hands away with a laugh.

"They can recognize a face years after they see it, so they get frustrated when they can't see your face." 

After a while, Toriel- having paid five dollars so Frisk could pet the sea lions- came to fetch you, saying it was about time to go. With a nod, you soon found Alphys and Undyne by the entrance and Undyne proceeded to ramble about how cool piranhas and sharks were and Alphys talked about the aquatic iguanas, giggling while she 'Ewww'd' when you told her they sneeze out salt water.

The group talked about all the weird things you saw over dinner at some restaurant on the way to the hotel, and you talked on and on about all the little, quirky facts you knew about any sea creature anyone mentioned. If Sans- or anyone, for that matter- had any questions, you had an answer 90% of the time. You admitted you had gone through a sea life phase for about a year after the first time you went there, and the information just stuck. 

Didn't matter to him; he could have listened to you talk about anything for hours on end and been entertained.

The hotel was nice; in the morning, there would be a provided breakfast that the gang would most likely murder. You and Papyrus immediately started jumping from one bed to the other, still giggly and excited about the whole thing. Eventually, you settled into a cross-legged position while Sans sprawled across the mattress. 

"Did you have fun?" You rubbed hand over the top of his skull, clicking through the twelve TV channels provided. 

"mm hm."

"I'm glad. I was kind of afraid you'd find it boring." You hummed under your breath, eventually turning off the tv. 

"nah."

"Don't worry, tomorrow will not be so walk-heavy, lazy."

"hmm." 

You moved to slide off the bed and he caught your arm, cracking an eye open to peer at you quizzically. "... sleep. with me." He gave your arm a tug and you chuckled as your face flushed red. You were painfully aware of Papyrus- still awake in the bed beside you- watching you squirm. Sans didn't seem to care, though his cheeks were faintly blue.

"I need to get into my pajamas first, dumbo. After that, yes, I will be back and sleep with you." When he smiled smugly and let you go, you stood up, casting a glance in the direction of the taller skeleton. "Unless of course, Papyrus wants me to sleep with him, instead." 

Papyrus, though faintly orange, broke into a laugh. Sans gave you a halfhearted frown, putting a hand to his chest as if betrayed.

"IT SEEMS MY CHARMS HAVE MADE YOUR VERTE-BAE SWOON, BROTHER! I APOLOGIZE, I NEVER MEANT TO STEAL YOUR LOVERS HEART!" Papyrus laughed, putting a hand to his forehead as he played along.

"i'm hurt. how could you both do this to me." 

"Oh, my dearest Sans..." You leaned over, planting a kiss just under his right eye. "You should know my heart only belongs to you."

When you came back to the bed- freshly showered, in your pajamas- Sans was waiting for you, propped in a very... provocative pose, shirtless with the sheets sprawled across his lower half. While your face like it was on fire, you couldn't help but burst into a laugh. You clicked your lamp off, said goodnight to Papyrus, and slid into the bed beside Sans. 

He wrapped his arms around you snuggly, pressing a kiss to your neck when you relaxed into him. 

"Goodnight, Sans."

"'night, babe."

"Sans."

"hm?"

"I... Have sweet dreams."

"you too, babe. love you."


	22. Water, Water Everywhere...

When Sans woke the next morning, he was momentarily confused: both because he distinctly remembered falling asleep with you next to him and because he didn't recognize where he was. It wasn't until you stepped out of the hotel bathroom, bag on your shoulder, that he recalled the previous day. With a groan, he pushed himself upright, rubbing at an eye socket. 

"Morning, sleeping beauty." You laughed, dropping your bag by the door to come and stand beside the bed. "Sleep alright?"

"mmph."

"I'll take that as a so-so. Come on, get ready or we'll miss breakfast." You leaned over, aiming to give him a peck on the cheek, when he turned his head to meet you halfway, lips meeting teeth. You quickly pulled away, surprised and flustered. He, though faintly blue in the cheeks, gave you a cheeky grin. 

You should have been used to that by now; you were nearing your five-month anniversary, after all. And yet, ever since... the 'Lily incident,' you'd been hesitant to give tokens of affection like that very often. It had felt... odd to, with the things he'd said fresh in your mind. You tried to shove the image of that angry sneer he'd given you out of your mind as you turned away.

"Hurry up and get ready, Mr. Sneaky pants." 

He chuckled. "alright, alright."

It was when he stepped out of the restroom a few minutes later that he fully noticed what you were wearing and was promptly aware of a faint blush rising in his cheeks. You were in shorts and large t-shirt, showing off the smooth flesh of your legs and one shoulder as the shirt slipped slightly to the side. In all the time he'd known you, he'd only ever seen you wear shorts a handful of times, most of the times being when you slept, covered by sheets. It made him want to touch you, but judging by the way you'd reacted to the kiss he'd slipped in just a few minutes before, he imagined it wouldn't be a welcome gesture.

You had some nice legs. Shoulders. Hands. Arms. Neck. Cheeks. Eyes. Such lovely eyes.

"Hey, earth to Sans, you want breakfast or not?" You quirked an eyebrow at him and he quickly came back to his senses. 

Just then, the door to the room was flung open and in barged Undyne, dressed in short shorts and a tank top. Alphys was behind her, wearing an outfit similar to yours. Papyrus was scampering back and forth in the hallway and it looked like he was wearing his 'COOL DUDE' outfit. Sans was beginning to feel like there was something about this next destination he wasn't clued in on.

"Hurry it up, dorks! No frick frackin' right now, we've got places to be!" And with that, Undyne went back into the hallway. The door directly next to yours opened and Toriel and Frisk stepped out, Frisk holding their dolphin plush under one arm, Flowey in the other.

"Are we all ready to go?" Toriel, bag over her shoulder, gave the group a small smile.

"I don't know, Sans, are we?" You gave him a teasing smile.

"ready as we'll ever be."

The breakfast bar downstairs didn't have a lot, but it did have muffins and coffee. You told Sans to go and claim a table, effectively tricking him into letting you make him a cup of coffee. While they lacked both cinnamon and butterscotch, you were pretty sure regular cream and sugar would be alright.

You came back to find the group mostly situated. You placed a muffin and a cup of coffee in front of Sans, then sat across from him. He gave a smile, thanking you for it while Undyne stated how excited she was about what the day would bring and Flowey complained about wanting to go home.

As everyone headed for the car, Sans, shoulder brushing yours, gave you a glance. "so where are we going today, or is that to be a secret, too?"

"I'll give you a hint. It ties into where we went yesterday pretty well."

He thought about it. "... a zoo?"

You laughed. "Nope. Guess you'll just have to wait and see."

He frowned playfully, but didn't say anything more about it for the rest of the ride. 

It was a relatively short drive compared to the one from yesterday, only about an hour and half from the hotel. Sans was aware of a change in the air, and a change of smell when he stepped out of the van behind you. The parking lot you had parked in was only about half full, and you said you were relieved it wasn't crowded. There was lots of sand, he realized. And lots of odd, stringy grass growing in the sand as if it was made to grow in the near-nutrition-less soil. It was odd.

Frisk and Papyrus led the charge up one of the sand dunes, soon disappearing down the other side. You, with a different bag now dangling from your shoulder, took Sans' hand with an excited smile.

"I think you're gonna like this."

And with that, you led the way up the sand dune right beside Toriel, Alphys and Undyne. The whole group stopped short at the top, and Sans couldn't help but gape at what stretched before his feet.

The sloping sand dunes led done to a flatter expanse that stopped at what seemed to be endless stretch to water, stretching all the way to the horizon. It rolled in and out slowly, white foam sprawling onto the sand to disappear amongst scattered chips of sea shells and bunches of seaweed. It was constantly changing color, one moment flashing white, the next the deepest of blues, the next a wonderful mix of green-blues. 

He could hardly believe what he was looking at. It seemed so... unreal.

"Wow." Alphys breathed out beside him, adjusting her glasses. "I'd seen it in documentaries, but in person..." 

"That's 75% of the earths surface, right there." You said, smiling as some large bird with an immense set of jaws flew overhead. 

"really?" Sans' eyes strained to see some form of far shore and found none. Even in the underground, if you were standing next to one of the walls, if you looked hard enough, you could see the opposite one in the distance. This... This was just absurd. 

"Well, not like, all in one place, but 75% of Earth is covered in water. Only about a really small part of that, a fraction of a percent, is freshwater. The ocean is entirely saltwater, so I wouldn't recommend tasting it." You laughed, giving his hand a tug. "Come on."

He followed numbly at your heels as you led the water down to the shore, only letting him go to drop your bag in what you decided was a nice enough spot. As you fished a large towel out of the bag, he walked carefully over to the waters edge. He threw off his shoes and socks, but hesitated as a wave of rolling water came to stop just an inch before his toes. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted Papyrus down on his hands and knees near the lip of the oceans mouth, peering into the water with obvious curiosity as Frisk waded carefully up to their knees close by. Undyne flew past him several feet away, diving into the water with a splash. She emerged a moment later, shaking spinning drops of water from her ponytail as she gave out a loud bark of laughter.

He slowly slid his feet into the next roll of water, finding it to be cool but not cold. It was different from any sort of water he'd felt before- it had... more substance to it, was not quite as thin, felt heavy, as if it had weight as it pushed past his legs as he continued his decent into the endlessness that covered 75% of earth. He stopped when it was halfway up his calves, staring down into it as if all the answers to all the questions he had about it were hidden there.

"Pretty neat, isn't it?" 

Your voice, just behind him, made him jump. You let out a sheepish chuckle as he put a hand to his ribcage, turning to look at you. You had removed the shorts you were wearing earlier, bottom of a swimsuit just visible beneath the shirt you still wore. The reflected light off the water beneath you caught in your eyes, a faint, salty breeze lifting your hair slightly. 

"Sorry, I should have said something." 

"nah, i was just... drowning in thoughts."

The bad pun brought a laugh out of you as you stepped up to stand beside him, head raised to look out at the far horizon. "I always really liked the beach. Maybe it because of the birds, maybe the dolphin spotting opportunities, maybe the sound of the water coming in and out, maybe just the water itself. It's always felt... like a giant calm in the midst of chaos everywhere else. Does that make sense?"

You turned to look at him. The reflected water made him look faintly green-blue, much like in the tunnel at the aquarium. It made him look surreal. "yeah. i get what you mean." You couldn't help but blush faintly when he grabbed your hand, giving it a squeeze. "if i'd known this is what you guys were keeping from us, i would have been more enthusiastic about coming to the surface."

You laughed. "This is only the tip of the iceberg. There's still Mount Everest, Mount Fuji, rainforests, deserts, the polar ice caps, the Galápagos Islands, uncharted territory... The world is pretty big. What we see is only a little bubble in the midst of an ocean." For a long time, you were born quiet as you stood in the middle of the water, side by side, listening to it whisper beneath you.

Sans suddenly let out a content sigh beside you. "this is pretty great."

"I'm glad you think so." You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath. The smell of the ocean was very soothing.

"thanks." And with that, he planted a toothy kiss to your cheek. He lingered a moment, then pulled away and looked out across the water as if nothing had happened.

"Sans?"

"hm?"

"... Want to go get some ice cream? There's a stand a little way up the beach."

"sure thing."

Eventually, you and Sans settled beside Toriel on the towel to watch Papyrus and Frisk build a sand castle around Flowey and Alphys and Undyne explore how the waves worked side by side. It was lovely out; not too cold, not blazing hot. Not too people (or monsters) were even on the beach, considering it was still a little too cold for actually swimming in the water.

At some point, Sans got up to watch Papyrus and Frisk from up close, leaving you with a relaxed Toriel.

"Thanks for agreeing with my idea, Tori. I was afraid it would be... I don't know. An impossible idea to go on such short notice."

"Not any trouble, dear. I think it's going swimmingly, don't you?"

You chuckled at the pun. "Amazingly so."

"... Sans certainly seems happy."

"I'm glad. I was hoping that would be the output."

"I think he's been happier and happier ever since you got together."

You flushed, drawing a small circle in the sand. "I guess. I don't know. ...I hope so."

"Is something troubling you?"

"... Yeah. Ive, um, yet to say... you know, the big three word phrase to him yet. Even though he's said it to me about a hundred times since we got together."

"And it seems a daunting task, yes?"

You breathed a sigh of relief. "Yes."

"The trick to it is to not think about it beforehand. Just let it slip out by accident at some point. At least, that's what I did with Asgore." She let out a chuckle at some memory. She and Asgore had gotten back on speaking terms recently, most likely for Frisk's sake, since they swapped between the two households often. 

"You had trouble saying 'I love you' to Asgore?" You couldn't help but chuckle at the thought. Toriel always seemed so confident in herself.

"But of course! Do not doubt my honesty." Toriel herself laughed, then pointed out where the sun was coming ever closer to the horizon. "Time sure does fly, doesn't it?"

"Mmhm."

Jus then, Alphys and Undyne came to lie on the towel beside you, dripping wet and covered in sand, but happy. Alphys chattered about how she couldn't wait to search up how the dynamic of a wave worked, and Undyne smiled at her even as it slipped into terms she probably didn't immediately understand. The way she adored her girlfriend was like nothing else.

You were just waiting for the day when she finally proposed to her lizard-lover.

Papyrus and Frisk came up a few minutes later, and somehow Frisk had gotten a lot of sand both in Flowey's pot and in their hair. While Toriel was working on getting the sand out, you got up to walk over to stand beside Sans. He had gone over to watch the sun dip toward the horizon, throwing a rippling, golden road across the water. 

He looked grand like that, cast in the glow of the pre-sunset. 

"... Did you have a good time, Sans?"

"you bet."

"I'm glad."

"did you?"

Surprised, you looked over to see him searching your face almost expectantly. "Of course. I always have a good time with you guys, Sans. ... Especially you." You looked away, flushing.

You saw him smile broader out of the corner of your eye. "i'm glad."

You took one of his hands, fiddling with the phalanges absently. "Sans?"

"yeah?" He looked faintly confused and you wondered if he'd caught on to your repetitive backing out behavior yet. 

Your stomach twisted into knots and your cheeks burned furiously and you couldn't look up to meet his gaze, instead focusing on his hand. "I... I love you, Sans."

A long pause greeted your words. Your cheeks burned hotter and you felt you might explode from how nervous you were. Eventually, after what felt like ages, you looked up to meet his gaze. You blinked at him in surprise.

He was smiling the broadest you'd ever seen him, though the curiouser part was that his little white pupils of light had dilated to small stars. Blue was painted across his face and he suddenly clasped his arms around you, lifting you clear of the ground to spin you around. You broke in a nervous laugh, clinging to him even when he put you down.

He pressed little kisses to every inch of your face he could. "you have no idea how happy that makes me."

"I'm sorry that it took me so long." You whispered, chuckling under your breath. "I was... I was nervous. Scared."

"it's fine, sweetheart. i love you, too." And, with that, he planted his teeth on your lips.

Nearby, you were aware of Flowey making gagging noises over the scene.

 

Sans was the one who drove the last stretch home. Toriel was in the passenger's seat beside him, blinking sleepily. He glanced in the mirror, catching sight of you in the very back, squashed between Papyrus and Frisk. Papyrus' head was on top of yours, and Frisk was pushed snuggly against your side, all three of you dozing.

He smiled to himself, forcing himself to focus on the road. You loved him. While he never doubted it, to hear you say so... It made his soul flutter in his rib cage. It made a giddy smile squirm its way across his face. 

It made him excited to hear you say it again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I need some filler and I'm running low on ideas! (Don't fret, Gaster shows up again soon. I haven't forgotten about him.) If you have any scenarios you'd like to see, drop them in the comments and I'll see what I can do about getting to it!


	23. It's alright.

It had been roughly a year (give or take a month or two) since you'd first met Sans. 

It was hard to believe that so much could happen in so much time. Roughly a year ago, you were a grieving, depressed anti-social hermit that could hardly go to the store to get a gallon of milk without having a break down. And now, here you were, better then you could ever remember being as you shimmied around your boyfriend's kitchen with your dog, happily making snicker doodles to surprise said boyfriend when he got home from work.

Of course, Specter was supervising as he usually did. 

You scooped up another spoonful of cinnamon-y goodness, catching the excess with a finger and slipping it into your mouth as you tapped said spoonful onto a baking sheet. A shadow materialized at your shoulder, soon finding its way over to the bowl still half-full of snicker dough. You smiled fondly to yourself; since you had found out Gaster had an affinity for classical music, you played it whenever you were home alone to draw him out of wherever he was hiding.

The shifting, faintly transparent skeleton- he was growing more and more visible as time passed, you noticed- hummed over the bowl containing the leftover dough, looking ready to try and scoop some out to give it a taste. As time had passed, he was growing more and more solid whenever he appeared in the waking world. Not completely so, of course (you could pass an arm through him if you put enough umph into it), but solid enough to hug or touch. 

Solid enough to taste test snicker doodle dough, if he so wished. 

You swatted a disembodied hand away from the bowl when it made a move to scoop up a dollop. The cracked face turned to give you a playful frown, drawing his hands away from the bowl with obvious reluctance. It made you laugh.

"Sorry, buster, no taste testing. Cookies will be ready in a little bit. You can try it then." With that, you lifted the baking sheet and slid it into the oven, soon setting the timer for twelve minutes. That done, you wrapped up the bowl with remaining dough and stuck in it the fridge for later. 

When you turned back around, Gaster was humming faintly to the music pouring out of your phone's speakers. He gave you a cheerful smile, then materialized his small white board and marker and began scribbling.

'How've you been?'

"Pretty good. I told you about the aquarium and beach trip? Yeah, I thought so. How've things been with you?"

More scribbling. ' :) '

You laughed. "I'm glad."

For a little while, you chatted back and forth casually, as if he wasn't an ancient skeletal monster stuck in a limbo of existence that just so happened to appear in the kitchen beside you. When the music faded out, you turned to put something new on, and when you turned back around, Gaster was giving you a cheeky smile.

'Knock knock' He made a knocking motion with his free hand as you read it. A smile squirmed its way across your face.

"Who's there?" You asked back, giving him an amused glance. 

'Dance with' His eyes crinkled as he smiled broader.

"Dance with who?" You had an idea where this was going, but you feigned innocence anyway.

'Dance with me?' And he extended a hand to you almost timidly, missing palm exposed to the air. 

With a chuckle, you put your hand in his. He smiled in an almost excited way, soon drawing you into a slow, simple dance. For someone with no legs- or arms, either- he was surprisingly smooth on his feet.

"Sorry if I step on your coat tails, I'm as graceful as a swan out of water over here." You chuckled, feeling a tad embarrassed as you stumbled slightly in a move you weren't expecting. 

He hummed to you, shaking his head. You had a feeling he would be giving you instructions, saying how well you were doing, if he thought you would understand him. At some point, you had to break way to take the cookies out of the oven, but as soon as you pulled off your oven mitts, he took your hands to draw you back into the dance again.

You were getting comfortable with it, settling into a nice rhythm with him, when suddenly the smell of ozone filled the air.

There was a window-rattling POP! that sent Specter dashing for the couch and brought Luka to her feet, hackles raised. Gaster disappeared from beneath your hands, obviously startled and not wanting to be seen by whoever just exploded their way into the house.

Luka crept protectively at your side as she led the way to Sans room, where strange, swirling light peeked out from beneath the door. It was cracked open slightly, and the doorknob was surprisingly cold as you carefully pulled it open. 

"Sans...?"

Sans was attempting to pull himself up by his bed stand, sweat shining on his skull as his arms trembled slightly. He was muttering something you couldn't quite hear and you assumed he hadn't heard you, either.

Luka hung back, seemingly assuming that running over and shoving her nose in his face wasn't the best course of action right now. You took a few careful steps forward, uncertain as to what was going on. 

"Sans? Are you alright? What's going on?" 

He struggled to his feet, head turning to look at you. You halted. His left eye was burning and flaming with a vengeance, usual smile dropped for a grimace in its place. He was tense as a string pulled taught, eye focusing on you after a few moments of it seemingly not registering who you were.

"Sans? Your eye... What's the matter?" You crept forward, slowly extending a hand to him. He looked like he might crumble like a deck of cards at any given moment. 

"i saw them they were there they weren't in Frisk i didn't know they could possess anyone else but they were in someone else and they looked right at me and i didn't know what to do." He started rambling, glancing toward the window and toward the closet and toward the doorway as if whoever he was talking about might be standing there.

"Who, Sans? Sans, you need to calm down, everything's alright-" You tried to sooth him, but it was like he couldn't hear you.

"they can't be back, though. Frisk said they were gone, gone for good, they couldn't live on without using Frisk but maybe they found someone else. that can't happen. it can't. i'm not ready to lose everything all over again, i'm not ready to loose you, i love you, sweetheart, i love you, i promise they won't lay a hand on you, not while i'm here." He latched onto you as soon as you touched his shoulder, hands gripping at the back of your shirt as if for dear life.

Caught by surprise, you lay your arms around him after a moment, rubbing his smooth, warm and still sweaty skull as comfortingly as you knew how. "Sans-"

"we need to call Paps, we need to get everyone here now-" He drew away slightly, hand quickly diving into his pockets, most likely searching for his phone. You were pretty sure he wasn't thinking straight and that calling everyone would just cause even more panic.

"Sans." You lay your hands on his upper arms, halting his movements and forcing him to look up at you. While the light had died down from the inferno it had previously been, his left eye was still flickering blue and yellow, gaze shaky and slightly distant. 

You recognized that look. Yes, he was having a panic attack. A very, very bad one, at that. Something had triggered it. All you had to do was make him see it was most likely just an ordinary object or person, and he would most likely calm down. If that didn't work, you should probably call Toriel. She was the most calming person you knew.

"Sans. I need you to take a deep breath for me. Alright?" After a moment of processing, he drew in a breath that expanded his ribcage, then he deflated again with an exhale. He kept his eyes on yours, still looking shaky and panicked. "Alright. That's good. Better, yeah? Now, I want you to tell me exactly what you saw."

"i saw- i saw them- Chara- they were there, in a different person this time-" 

You hushed him before he could start rambling again. While you didn't know who 'Chara' was, but it was obvious he had some sort of past with them. Not the good kind, either. "What made you think it was them, Sans?"

"the eyes, the eyes- they had red eyes, red eyes all over again..."

Huh. What a weird thing to be so sure meant doom. "Sans, Sans, shhh. You're fine. Everyone is fine. They were probably wearing contacts. Colored contacts? They change what color your eyes appear to be, they can make brown eyes look blue, or blue eyes look red."

He seemed falter, looking confused as a child. His eye dimmed some. "contacts?"

"Yes, contacts. There is nothing to worry about. Everything is fine. Okay?" You took one of his hands, rubbing it soothingly. Luka came creeping, step by careful step, up to your side. 

"they- it... it wasn't them?"

"No, Sans. It was probably just an ordinary person wearing contacts that made their eyes look red." You gently pushed him to sit on the bed. His eye bore deep into yours for several moments, blue-yellow slowly fading away to be replaced by two, large orbs of white, hazy and confused and lost. You drew him into a hug, rubbing his shoulders soothingly. Luka sat carefully in front of him, gently resting her chin on his knee.

For a long while, you just sat there, doing your best to help him calm down. He fell silent and still after a while, and a while after that, you pulled away a little to check on how he was looking. He looked distant, like he'd drawn into his mind. That was alright. You did that, too. Your hand found his, and you winced when you felt how damp it still was. 

You stood up and he lifted his head to look at you as if afraid you would leave. You gave his hand a tug. "Come on. Let's get you washed up, sweaty." 

He followed you quietly into the bathroom, and, as you were waiting for the tub to fill with warm water, you turned and tugged at one of his hoodie sleeves before unzipping it. 

"Come on. You can't take a bath with your clothes on." You turned away to give him privacy as he complied, dipping a hand into the water to see just how warm it was. Finding it to be warm enough for your liking, you promptly fished through the bottles of soap and body wash for something to make it smell as nice as you hoped it would feel.

By the time you thought it was nice enough to suit, you realized he must have long since stripped down to bare bones. While you were 99% sure he didn't exactly have... well, to be frank, the human male package, considering he was a skeleton, that didn't mean he didn't have /something/ down there, considering he was a monster that looked like a skeleton, not an actual human one. You couldn't help but hesitate.

Buck up. You've been together for six months. So what if you see it? Now was a time to worry more about him then yourself. Drawing a breath, you turned to face your boyfriend, hoping you were suppressing the burning in your cheeks well enough for it not to be obvious where your mind was wandering.

Oh, thank god, he lacked what you were afraid he wouldn't. He just looked like a basic skeleton, if somewhat... heavier. He didn't just look pudgy through layers of clothes; his bones were thicker then you remembered a human skeleton's being. Big boned, if you will. Somehow, it didn't surprise you.

You slid out of the way and he slipped into the water with a barely audible sigh. Without much thought to it, you slipped your sweatpants off and sat on the edge of the tub, picking up a sponge and lathering it in what you assumed was his preferred bone-wash.

He was quiet as you swabbed him over with it, eyes still slightly tense as he seemingly studied you. It was awkward, at first, washing him in the quiet with nothing but the splashing of the water filling the silence. After a bit, you started to hum the only song you could think of.

'You are my sunshine,  
My only sunshine...'

Luka, sitting outside the door as if on vigil, tilted her head as you hummed, turning to look at you over her shoulder. 

After rinsing him off a few times, wiping a stray stand of bubbles out from under his eye, and giving him a reassuring smile, you pulled the plug to drain the tub and instructed him to step out. You toweled him off gently, rubbing his cheeks carefully with the fluffy towel as he continued to watch you as if he was waiting for an answer to a silent question. 

Draping the towel over his shoulders, you gave his shoulder a squeeze before stepping out of the bathroom, scooping up his clothes along the way.

"Wait here. I'll get some clothes from the wash."

Luka stayed with him as you disappeared down the hall. You dumped his clothes in the washer room, fishing through the drier for the clothes you'd stuck in there earlier. You pulled out the still warm t-shirt, shorts, boxers, and soft socks with a pleased smile, tucking them under one arm as you dumped the rest of the dried clothes into a clothes hamper. You tossed his hoodie into the drier, turned it on to tumble it for fifteen minutes so it would be nice and warm and not smell like monster sweat, then headed for the bathroom. 

He wasn't there. You found him sitting on the edge of his bed, Luka sitting beside him, loyal as ever. You set the clothes beside him, telling him that his hoodie would be ready in a little bit. He slipped into the clothes quietly, and you helped him tug the shirt over his head last.

You dusted off your hands, then gave Luka a pat before turning back to him with a smile. "Now. I made snicker doodles. Care to try them out for me?" Your smile dissolved a second later. 

He sniffled, hand coming up to wipe at the tears dribbling from his eye sockets as he dipped his head in an attempt to avoid your gaze. His shoulders shuddered slightly as he drew a deep breath. 

"Sans...?" You sat beside him, laying a hand over his uncertainly. Had you done something wrong? Your gut twisted nervously. "Are you alright?"

"... yes. yes, i'm alright." He took a deep breath, wiping away tears again before lifting his head. It seemed he was fighting to keep them down, as more still shone blue in his sockets. 

"Are you sure? Did I say something bad?" You lifted a hand to thumb one of the tear tracks away. He subconsciously leaned into the touch.

"no, no. you're alright. you're amazing. you're more then i could ever ask for." He closed his eyes, hand coming up to trap yours close to his cheek. "it's just... why are you with me?"

You blinked, taken aback. "What?"

"fuck, sweetheart." He sighed, expression souring. "i'm just a lazy skeleton that likes bad jokes and has more problems than a prototype. you could do a hell of a lot better, you know that?" One of his eyes opened to look at you as if he was honestly inquiring.

"Sans, you're much better than that. You're everything I could have ever hoped for in a lover, really." You flushed with a small laugh, rubbing your thumb back and forth underneath his eye. "I couldn't care less about your problems. All I care about is you."

"you don't know that. you don't even know the half of it, sweetheart. why would you even go through the effort of... this? why are you being so nice to me?" He looked away. "all i did was come in here like my hair was on fire and start rambling about stuff i've never bothered to tell you about and you just... come in here and calm me down and help me out even though i'm not making any sense and..." He trailed off, closing his eyes again.

"Sans, everyone has bad moments, some are worse then others, no one ever plans them or even tries to make sense when they happen, and that's okay. That's alright. I'll always try to help you out, alright? You don't have to try and hide around me, okay?" You gave his cheek a comforting pat, smiling as best you knew how.

"... okay. thank you, sweetheart. i love you, you know that?"

"Of course I do. I love you too." You leaned over and gave him a peck on the cheek, then stood up with a reassuring smile. "So. Snicker doodles?"

He shakily returned the smile, standing up beside you. "snicker doodles." 

Luka sneezed loudly. 

"Sorry, Luka, you don't get any." You laughed, ruffling her ears. 

You led the way to the kitchen, sliding the cookies off the baking sheet and onto the cooling rack. For a while, all you and Sans did was stand there in the kitchen, nibbling at the cookies to pass the time. Luka was not very happy that she didn't get any, but Specter- appearing from beneath the couch to stroll atop the counter top- didn't seem to mind that he didn't get one, snubbing it when you offered him one.

'Chara' wasn't mentioned again. And that was okay. He could keep his secrets if he so wished, and he didn't offer to explain what the panic attack was about. You shoved it to the back of your mind as Papyrus came home, smiling good-naturedly he berated you and Sans spoiling your appetite on cookies before dinner.

Everything was okay, panic attacks aside. That was all that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For some reason I wanted to try my hand at PTSD!Sans. So. Um. Here you go.


	24. Bodies

Time passed. 

Halloween came and went, of which Luka was the highlight, wearing armor to make her look even more like a cyborg; Thanksgiving came and went, and Rob was invited to Toriel's for the event and he enjoyed himself thoroughly, bragging about you regularly and fawning over Luka with a faint nostalgia in his eyes.

Yes. It had been- what? five years? since Ace had passed. He was sure to miss the feeling of loving and being loved by a furry quadruped. 

After that, Rob was a regular attendee to any and all sorts of events. He and Papyrus and Undyne went together splendidly, oddly enough, though he and Sans could relate on a lot of different subjects, and he liked Toriel's soothing presence and he liked debating different prospects of society with Asgore, and he and Alphys had several talks about what it was like to live with anxiety, mostly for your benefit. He was a nice addition to the team.

Christmas approached ever closer and Sans was regarding it more as your anniversary rather than the traditional holiday. Charlie was regarding his romantic shenanigans with distaste.

Speaking of, Charlie had ick. It wasn't anything serious, and it was already going away with the simple treatment you were giving him, but when Papyrus had found the small white spots littering his scales and found out he was ill, he utterly lost it. 

"WHAT?! NO! I AM TOO FOND OF OUR MINIATURE UNDYNE FOR HIM TO DIE!" And he'd flung his arms around the tank, hugging it as he sobbed loudly. Charlie had not found it as endearing you did. "I AM SO SORRY, SMALL FISH FRIEND! I SHOULD HAVE SEEN YOUR IMPENDING DOOM!" 

It had taken you twenty minutes to calm him down.

Charlie wasn't small or miniature anymore, either. He was longer than your palm, and you would have to consider getting a new tank if he kept growing like this. 

He and Specter got along strangely well; when Specter would sleep with his side up against the tank, Charlie would deliberately come over and 'sleep' right next to him. It was sweet. 

You were watching said display one morning, lying on your stomach on the sofa with your head propped up on the arm, legs waving in the air. Luka was just beyond your knees, back brushing your shins with her legs sprawled out in front of her.

Suddenly, the couch dipped under you slightly and you saw hands appear to rest beside your sides out of the corner of your eye. You could feel a looming bulk above you and you rolled over, chuckling up at Sans as he propped himself up above you.

"Well, hello." You raised an eyebrow at him, curious about his sudden antics.

"hey, gorgeous. come here often?" He smirked down at you, wiggling his eyebrows. You snickered.

"I should hope so, considering I live here. Now I've gotta question of my own." You laughed out, bring your hands up to cross them behind you head. "Is that a bone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" You gave a suggestive smirk, pointedly glancing down, then wiggling your eyebrows at him.

He blinked in surprise, whole face staining blue as you let out a loud laugh at his expression. 

"I'm kidding." 

He narrowed his eye sockets at you, grinning playfully. "can i borrow a kiss? i promise i'll give it back." 

You snickered, giving a grin right back. "You must be a keyboard, 'cause you're just my type."

"are you a camera? because every time i see you, i smile." 

"That's cheating." You laughed out. "You're always smiling."

"that's because i can't stop thinking about you." 

"Can I have a picture of you so Santa knows what I want for Christmas?" 

"Sans-ta's got you covered." 

"Your eyes are blue like the ocean, and, baby, I'm lost at sea."

"have any raisins? how about a date?"

"Let's flip a coin, heads I'm yours, tails you're mine." 

"are you a galaxy? 'cause you have me seeing stars."

"I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together." You laughed, wheezing slightly. "We have to stop, I'm running out of pick-up lines and air!" Sans chuckled above you, giving you a half-lidded look.

"alright, but i've got one more."

"Okay, okay. Shoot." You chuckled up at him, giving him a lopsided grin.

"you wanna know the best part of my day? it's the first word of that question." 

It took you a moment, but you flushed and hid behind your hands. "Sans! That too cute! That's cheating!"

"all is fair in love and war." You saw him grin broader above you, then he pulled your hands away and gave you toothy kisses to your blazing cheeks. He snickered at your expression, to which you responded by giving his shoulder a light push.

"Mean."

"how could my own lover say such a thing to me? i'm heartbroken." He put a hand to his forehead, lying down beside you and putting his arms snugly around you. 

It was nice, lying there beside him like that. For being entirely made of bone, he was very comfortable to snuggle against. You rolled so you were facing him, draping an arm across his ribcage. Luka, sensing that the couch was perhaps a little bit crowded, slid to the floor and crawled up to lie near your shoulders, within hands reach. You rested your head against his collar be one, tilting your head up a bit to see his jaw and vertebral column. He looked like he was dozing, eyes gently closed, despite it being about noon.

Without much thought to it, you reached up and pressed a kiss to his jaw. He cracked one eye open and peered down at you, cheeks bones turning faintly blue. He blinked himself awake when you sat up and straddled his hips carefully.

"what? what's up?" He looked up you, looking faintly flustered and confused with his cheekbones turning a deeper shade of cyan. 

"Nothing. Don't worry about it. I just... get curious sometimes." You shrugged, blushing a bit yourself. You reached up and ran a thumb along his cheekbone carefully.

"... curious about what?" He blushed deeper, suddenly looking somewhat sweaty.

"You." His face turned noticeably bluer at that. "Your bones, I mean. It's not every day I get to see and touch a living, breathing, bare skeleton. Well, technically now it is, but... Not everyone can say that. It's funny, whenever I see you without your shirt on, I'm surprised. I have to remind myself you're a skeleton under all this soft padding." You put a hand on his ribcage to demonstrate, fingers running gently over the thick turtleneck he was wearing. 

His expression softened somewhat, but he looked almost nervous. "really?"

"Yeah. It's kind of weird." Had you not been so focused on tracing one of his ribs through the shirt, you would have noticed his expression tense. 

"Some times kind of scary, too." You didn't notice his smile drop completely. 

"But, I guess that's just my primal human instincts. It's my brain shouting at me that if that much bone- any bone at all, for that matter- were showing, there would be something very, very wrong with whoever I was looking at. Like when people see a human brain- or anythings brain- and freak out and get grossed out. It's because if we're seeing that part of our body, that means there's something very, very wrong. That kind of thing. Does that make sense?" You glanced up, then blinked in surprise.

He was looking up at you worriedly, eyes surprisingly... concerned?

"What? Was it something I said?"

He tried to speak, then cleared his throat. "do i... do i freak you out?"

You blinked, at a loss of words for a moment. How could you have been so tactless? You mentally slapped yourself, shaking your head furiously. "No, no! Not at all! I think you're lovely, Sans. Everything about you." You lifted your hands away from his ribcage, feeling ashamed. 

"even the bones part?"

"Of course. I like your bones. I don't know why, but they're very... comfortable. Comforting. Soothing to touch. Familiar. Sometimes, you're just so expressive and alive and... soft that I forget. Those normally aren't things we associate with skeletons around here." You chuckled softly, trying to lighten the mood. "You have to understand, Sans. Humans are used to skeletons only ever being the kind inside us. It's what we were taught in school. Sometimes it's hard to forget that, that's all. You're so alive and warm and... /you/ that I don't associate you with normal skeleton things. Does that make sense?"

He searched your gaze carefully, but nodded after a moment. "i was worried you were repulsed by me for a second there."

You laughed. "Repulsed? By you? Are you kidding? You're my big bony teddy bear of a boyfriend. Repulsed? Quite the opposite, really. I'm drawn to you more than anything." And you gave him a warm smile, trying to be as loving and reassuring as you always wanted to be.

He returned the smile, hands finding your thighs and rubbing them softly. "i'm glad." 

"What about you?"

His loving gaze was replaced by one of slight confusion. "me?"

"Is it weird, dating a skeleton covered in... 'squishy, fragile armor,' as I once heard Papyrus call it?" You chuckled, then tilted your head, genuine worry rising in your chest and clasping around your heart. "Does it ever... freak you out? Make you go 'ew, gross?' Make you... uncomfortable?"

His expression softened again. "nah. i like everything about you, from your head to your toes. sure, there are little things i've yet to learn about the human body that will probably catch me off guard in the future, but that won't ever make me feel repulsed by you. i like how soft you are. sometimes i forget you have a skeleton inside you to begin with." He chuckled. "you should know how that feels."

You chuckled, but couldn't help but glance away. Suddenly, you were all too aware of your body- all the chubby parts- too chubby-, all the skinny parts- too skinny. It made your skin crawl.

"hey, hey." Sans said softly below you, apparently sensing your change in mood. "i think you're beautiful, bones to skin, inside to out. i don't just go around calling everyone 'gorgeous' after all." He gave you a adoring grin, hands finding your arms and pressing gently into the flesh. "i like all of you, especially all of this." He ran a thumb gently up your wrist, causing the skin to wrinkle slightly. "makes for a much better cuddle buddy than another skeleton, if you ask me. can you imagine what that would be like? bones against bones? no thanks."

You snorted, giving him a small smile. "That's your own kind you're talking about, you know."

"yeah, me and Papyrus and a handful of others maybe scattered across the globe that i don't even know. it's not like i'm insulting an entire nation, here." He snickered out, rolling his eyes. 

"You sure a mean bag of bones, huh?" You took one of his hands in both of yours, absently studying the phalanges and how they moved. 

"ah, but you love me anyway."

"I sure do." You lifted your eyes to meet his, giving him a tender smile.

Without a word, he reached up and cupped your face in his hands, then pulled you down into a kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ,,, it's been a while oops lol
> 
> Got something you want to see? Drop it in the comments and I'll see what I can do!


	25. Like a broken vase

It was a beautiful day outside. Sun was shining, bird were singing. On days like these, people like you...

Were sitting upside down on the couch while a skeleton that technically didn't exist was rambling to himself as he leafed through the variety of books on your boyfriend's bookshelf. You know, normal things. 

You were only half-way paying attention to Gaster, legs swinging idly in the air as you re-read one of the books from the underground as classical music filled the air quietly. This had long since been a routine for you and Gaster, him talking to you about anything and everything while you read on the couch, only half-way understanding what he was saying. Something was different this time, however. You couldn't put your finger on it, but something was certainly different. It was distracting. 

Whatever it was, Gaster didn't seem to notice. He was rambling on as he usually did.

"... I suppose I can understand where he picked up the habit from, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. Of all things, condiments? Really? I am fairly certain that it is not good for his health. But then, perhaps I am not one to talk. I am the one who raised him, after all." He let out a sigh, sliding a book back onto the shelf.

"Come on, Gaster, you're being ridiculous. No parent can 100% control what habits their kids will have, even if it's... having an affinity for ketchup and things of the sort. Sure, it's kinda weird, but it's... At least it's not, like, smoking." You tried to assure him, giggling as Luka put her head on your stomach, letting out a groan of content.

Gaster seemed to pause. "Wait. Did you understand all of what I just said?"

"Yep. All of that, too. Why?" You put your book on your chest, giving his upside down form an inquiring look. He was looking at you as you'd just grown wings and become a god- awed. 

It took you several seconds to understand why.

"I just understood all of what you just said." You suddenly realized the full of implications of that, pulling yourself up to sit on the couch properly. "... That's never happened. Have you- I mean, how?" 

Gaster had clasped his hands together, smiling like a child who got what they always wanted for Christmas. "Goodness! This is simply- wonderful. Simply wonderful! This is fantastic news." 

Luka crawled onto your lap, despite being about three times too large for such things. You scratched at your cheek, growing more and more confused. "But... Why?"

For a moment, it was almost like Gaster hadn't heard you. "Why, this is better than I could have ever hoped! It seems your soul has taken to mine better that I could have dreamed. Simply astounding." 

"... Gaster?"

He quickly came and sat beside you, taking one of your hands in his. "Child, would you mind if I could see your soul? I can answer any question from there." 

You blinked. Your soul? It had been a while since you'd seen it. Months. "Um, alright."

He gave you a reassuring smile, placed a hand near your chest, then pulled it away while forming a fist. There was a tug from within your chest, then appeared your indigo soul.

But it wasn't just indigo anymore. Where the spider webs of cracks used to be was an opaque white filler, seemingly holding the soul together like glue in a broken plate. You blinked down at it, confused but intrigued all the same. 

Gaster cradled it in his hands, smiling down at it as if it was a marvel. "Simply amazing. Wonderful. Oh, if only I was still in existence- how much the world would know of how souls work from this alone!"

"Um, Gaster? I'm still... really, really confused." 

He blinked, seemingly coming back to reality. "Ah! Yes. Of course. Now, let's see. What's your first question?"

He suddenly sounded like a teacher very eager to teach their subject. "Um. Why... Why is my soul like that? Didn't it used to be solid indigo?" 

Gaster nodded, expression changing to a grimace. "Well, yes. This is... This is a nice place to start, but there is no kind way to put it. It will sound harsh, but... sometimes, that is just the way things are."

"Alright?"

Gaster closed his eyes as if recalling something. "You see... When a soul self-destructs, or, rather, when a soul... passes, it briefly passes through my void. Normally the shattering process happens so quickly I don't even feel their presence. But, when its self-destruction, the shattering process slows down monumentally." 

Gaster took one of your hands in his, soothing thumb across your tendons. "I could feel you, in my void, that day. The day..." He cast a glance to the dog laying across your lap, or, more specifically, her artificial leg. "How long ago?"

You racked your brain. "A year ago? Yesterday or the day before, a year ago. Or about that." 

He hummed, nodding. "Well, I could feel you in my void that day, could feel your soul. I knew of you, had sensed you had grown close to my boys, could feel that Sans' soul yearned for yours. I knew that if you were to pass, it would mean nothing but sadness and despair for both of them, as well as..." He cracked a small smile, a hand lowering to brush against Luka's head. "Your loyal canine would miss you deeply."

You smoothed a hand across her ribs as Luka lifted her head and blinked at Gaster, as if sensing she was being talked about. 

"But you see, in the split seconds I had to react, the first thing that came to mind had never been proven to work. It had never even been tested. It was very risky." Gaster closed his eyes, wincing. "But I couldn't just let you pass without trying. It would forever haunt me. So, I threw caution to the wind."

"... So, what did you do?"

He drew a deep breath. "When a human dies, their soul can linger after death. Monsters have found that they can 'fuse' with said souls, two souls combining to form something... greater than the sum of their parts. It hasn't been found if human souls can do the same with monster ones, considering a monster's soul is weaker and cannot last after death. However." 

He gave you a reassuring smile, then related the soul summoning move on himself. Out of his ribcage appeared a white heart much like your own, but it looked like it's been through hell and back. The edges were crackled, but the most frightening part was the top right arch, where a clean fragment was missing, as if cut out of a children's paper drawing. He traced the missing slice with a finger, then ran a finger over one of the larger filled-in cracks of your own.

It took you a moment, then your heart jumped into your throat. "Oh my god."

"Quite." He chuckled, looking away briefly. "I knew the only thing that would keep your soul from breaking would be if something were to forcibly stop it from doing so, so I... put in a glue of sorts to keep it together." He smiled weakly down at your soul, looking faintly troubled. "It was funny, though. Just as I was performing the procedure, it almost seemed like your soul paused as if contemplating whether there was something to keep living for."

"So... You're... We're like, um, part of you is inside me? Forever?" 

"Well, I suppose. Eventually, with the right treatment, your soul will heal on its own and the cracks will fill in of their own accord, but technically, yes, part of me will always be inside you." He gave you a gentle smile. "I'm glad I reacted so quickly. If I hadn't... I would have very well lost a child. After all, I'm assuming you and Sans will settle down one day..." He wiggled his eyebrows at you, giggling to himself.

You flushed, covering your face with you hands. "Well, that's one way to change the mood."

"Certainly." He chuckled, wrapping his arms around you. 

"But, wait."

"Hm?"

"Is that the reason you've been appearing so much more clearly and why I can understand you?"

"Of course. With something to anchor myself to, it's been increasingly easy to conjure myself in this world. I fear I will never be able to stay permanently, but I can appear wherever you are fairly solidly." He hummed, seemingly relaxed and content. 

For a long time, neither of you said anything. Just sat there, side by side, sharing Luka between you as you took turns smoothing the silky fur of her sides. She seemed fairly content with it.

"... Gaster."

"Hm?"

"... Who's going to tell Sans?"

He stiffened beside you. Silence fell.

"I can do it, if you don't want to."

"No, no. I will. Eventually. I... Give me time. I have to think of a way to say it, and I want to choose an opportune time. I don't want to simply dump the information on him out of the blue. I... I fear he might not take it well." He whispered out, looking uncertain.

"Everything'll be alright, Gast. Don't think about it too much. We've got time."

He rested his cheek against your head. "For now, I just want to enjoy the quiet. Is that alright?" 

"Of course."

Luka, now stretched out across both of your laps, lifted her head and gave Gaster's hand a nuzzle of reassurance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't get your hopes up for that 'telling Sans' thing, btw. I just... don't have any ideas for it. It would only end up happening if I made a sequel, tbh. Please, don't cry about it in the comments. :( It makes me feel bad.


	26. Father, Your Honor, May I Explain?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If this feels awkward and rushed or forced, that's because I wasn't actually planning on writing it- or, I was, but in the first draft of this story, it was going to replace the argument Reader had with Sans over Lily; in this version, it was never going to happen at all- at least not in this part of the story.
> 
> Yeah, it would have been a very different story, tbh. 
> 
> But, hey, I was thinking to myself 'what if the worst thing that could possibly happen, happened?' and this popped into my head. So here you go. Sorry if it sucks lol

Apparently, you were wrong. 

You woke several hours later, drawn out of a doze by the sound of a key in the front doors lock. For a moment, you were confused. Then you realized the heavy weight in your lap was Luka and the heavy weight resting snugly against your side and laid across your head was Gaster, sleeping quietly beside you. It was sweet, to wake to such a normally stressed looking person looking so relaxed.

And then you realized someone was home, and while it may very well be Papyrus, whoever it was would end up seeing Gaster and that would lead to nothing but questions and you really, really didn't do questions and-

"babe? i'm-"

Sans' voice abruptly cut off just as your heart leapt into your throat. You did you best to lift your head to see him standing in the doorway of the living room, staring at you with wide, unreadable eye sockets. He wasn't smiling, you knew that much.

You sharply elbowed Gaster once. Twice. At the third he stirred slightly.

"Gaster." You hissed out of the side of your mouth, eyes still locked on Sans. 

"Hm?" He sounded half asleep. You could have cried for having woken him up when he normally looked like he needed a good, long rest. 

"Uh. You remember how I said we had time?" You tried to speak past the lump in your throat. You might throw up soon.

"Mmhm."

"I was mistaken."

"What do you-?" He finally seemed to catch on to the urgency in your voice, sitting up and flexing his fingers, only to stop and look utterly terrified at the sight of his son standing not twelve feet away. 

He snapped to attention, abruptly sliding out of existence. You were left alone in the suddenly cold living room with a black-socketed Sans. 

Maybe you were a mass murderer in a past life, otherwise you couldn't imagine what you did to deserve... this.  
You wilted under his relentless look. He didn't look happy. He didn't look anything except scary, to be honest. He was still as death, and he hadn't moved from his spot since he entered. For what felt like an eternity, nothing happened.

"how." His voice was calm- too calm. Cold and unwavering as steel. It made you afraid and you might break into tears.

"Ah, he... It's hard to explain." You eventually stammered out, hands finding a pillow and curling their fingers into it tightly. Deep breaths. Luka, sensing your panic, woke and sat up beside you, resting her nose gently against your shoulder. 

"do you know who that was." He still hadn't moved. Not so much as a twitch. 

"Uh, y-yes. That was- that was W. D. Gaster. Former royal scientist. Your... father." You shrank in on yourself. Keeping secrets felt awful, but having those secrets be found out and having to explain why they had been secrets in the first place... It was like being skinned alive. 

"how long."

You blinked at him for several moments, faintly confused which did no more than add fuel to your burning panic.

"how long have you been seeing him."

"N-nearly a year." It came out very, very quietly and you averted your gaze, instead watching your fingers practically tear holes into the upholstery of the pillow.

"a year, and you didn't tell me!?" Sans suddenly exploded, left eye igniting with a vengeance as he snarled his betrayal at you. 

"I just- it didn't seem important!" Your eyes stung and your stomach rolled and you wanted to curl up in a ball and hide under a table and _not be here._

__"it didn't seem important?! do you know how long I've been trying to get him back?! did it ever occur to you that maybe you should mention that you knew a way to see and touch and talk to the guy i've been trying to reach for years, my own dad?!" Sans threw out his hands, obviously boiling mad. You cowered, looking away._ _

__"I'm sorry!"_ _

__"how would you feel about it if i could talk to one of your dead parents for a year and i didn't say a thing about it?!"_ _

"I don't know, Sans!" You burst out, throwing up your own hands helplessly. "I don't know! I wouldn't be angry! Gaster, please! I don't know how to do this!" _Don't leave me here alone _, you silently added, wanting to weep.__

____Gaster materialized beside you, looking guilty and ashamed. "I'm sorry. I panicked. It wasn't fair of me to leave you here alone." He brushed a hand over one of your shoulders, attempting to be soothing. It worked, somewhat. Your panic died down, if only a little._ _ _ _

____Sans had fallen still again, eyes dark and empty. He looked less angry and more... sad. Big, blue tears started to roll down his cheeks and Gaster swept forward, taking Sans into his goopy, slightly transparent arms. Sans cried silently against him and Gaster gave you a reassuring look over the top of his head, then led his crying son down the hall and into his bedroom. You only dared to breath again when you heard the door close quietly behind them._ _ _ _

____You took several long, deep breaths for a few long minutes. Luka rested her cheek against your shoulder. It was so much easier to calm down with her there._ _ _ _

____You slid to the floor, grabbing the fur brush off one of the lower shelves of the bookshelf and coaxing Luka to lie on the floor in front of you. For a long, long time you sat there on the floor with her, running the brush through her fur in long, smooth strokes. Eventually, Specter appeared from somewhere and sat on the couch behind your head. You eventually cracked a smile when he tried to clean your hair for you, waving him off with a weak chuckle._ _ _ _

____Thank the lord for these animals._ _ _ _

____Luka, eventually growing tired of being brushed, wiggled her way into your lap and sat there, head tucked under your chin, trapping you until she decided to get up. You wrapped your arms around her and she sighed in content, and you could feel her blink sleepily under your chin._ _ _ _

____To be honest, sleeping sounded like a really great idea right about now._ _ _ _

____You heard Sans' door click open roughly two hours after they disappeared inside. You stayed where you were, not wanting to instigate another argument. Even when you heard someone coming down the hall and saw someone pause in the doorway out of the corner of your eye, you stayed where you were._ _ _ _

____You ran a hand over Luka's side, slowly and carefully smoothing the fur. From the corner of your eye, you saw Sans shift. It seemed he was alone. Gaster was nowhere to be seen._ _ _ _

____"When I was in school, I got asked if I had a problem with authority a lot." You eventually said, quiet in the silent house. "Because when my teachers would call on me when I wasn't paying attention and I didn't know what was being asked, I wouldn't admit I hadn't heard the question and would just sit there and stare at them instead."_ _ _ _

____You weren't sure why you were even saying this, considering it still bothered you to this day and it made you uncomfortable to talk about it. This seemed to happen whenever you weren't sure how to explain your previous behavior; you'd pull a random memory out of the air and suddenly it would be coming out of your mouth before you could stop yourself._ _ _ _

____"Because, somehow, admitting I hadn't been paying close enough attention to catch what they'd said was worse then being stared at by everyone for minutes on end and having everyone assume i was thick or just plain stupid." You couldn't look up to meet his gaze._ _ _ _

____At least he was kind enough to not interrupt. It was kind of off putting that he wasn't saying anything at all, though._ _ _ _

____"They would call me out either after or in the middle of class and ask me the same thing, every time: 'Do you have a problem with authority?' I never had the guts to tell them I just was too afraid to speak up in front of my peers and instead would stand there and almost cry and not look at them because I knew I would start crying if I did. I always felt awful afterwards, but it was already too late to say 'sorry.'" Your hand ran slowly over one of Luka's ears, and you absently marveled over how soft and pliable it was._ _ _ _

____Silence. For a long, long time._ _ _ _

____"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry." You lowered your head a fraction, preparing yourself for another angry outburst. After all, sorry doesn't cut it in situations like this._ _ _ _

____"i am, too." Sans surprised you by saying, and he sounded more tired than anything. You hesitantly looked at him, confused. He wasn't smiling, but he didn't look angry, either. "i shouldn't have gotten so mad or taken it out on you. ... Dad explained everything. can i... see?"_ _ _ _

____His gaze flicked to your chest, then back up to your eyes, studying you. You realized what he wanted. "Oh. Um, okay. Sure."_ _ _ _

____He walked over and sat in front of you, soon performing the soul-summoning tug on you. There appeared your hastily repaired soul, glowing indigo between you. The white of Gaster's soul stood out against the deep blue-purple of your own._ _ _ _

____Sans carefully took it in his hands, turning it over a few times before running his phalanges gently over one particularly large crack- or, more accurately, over the place where Gaster's soul was keeping it together. The feeling sent a bolt of shivers racing up your spine and you winced slightly. He immediately retracted his hands, leaving your soul to float on its own again._ _ _ _

____More silence. You really hated silence. It allowed that worst-case-scenario part of your mind to shout all the louder and drown out your other thoughts._ _ _ _

____"wow." Sans eventually said. You trained your eyes on your soul, not willing to meet his gaze. "part of me always wondered why it just... stopped. guess i know now. never would have thought..." He shook his head as if he couldn't believe it._ _ _ _

____To be fair, you couldn't either._ _ _ _

____"pops told me everything." Sans said after a few moments, eyes trying to find yours. "about what he did. also told me that you only found out today. if i was honest, i'd say i'm still kind of mad, but a lot more understanding of the whole thing now."_ _ _ _

____"I just didn't know how to tell you." You whispered out, squeezing your eyes shut._ _ _ _

____He didn't say anything, but you could feel his eyes on you._ _ _ _

____"I never meant for it to happen this way. We were planning on telling you, I swear. I just... I didn't want this to be how it turned out. I didn't want you to stop trusting me. I didn't want you to hate me." Your fingers curled into the loose folds of Luka's skin and she reached out and pressed her nose to your arm. It was comforting, despite being cold and wet._ _ _ _

____"I know lovers aren't supposed to have secrets, I know that. I know it was awful of me to not mention it for so long. But... I'm not the only one with secrets around here." A flash of boldness rose up in you as you realized it was true- he was really the one with secrets around here- and you raised your head, meeting his gaze. He seemed taken aback._ _ _ _

____"some secrets are best kept. for your own good." He said it almost sternly, but he wouldn't meet your gaze all the same._ _ _ _

____"Well, now you know how I felt about our little secret, then." You paused. "It's not just me that didn't tell you, you know. He could have very well appeared whenever he wanted and talked to you about everything." You hated calling Gaster out like that, but it seemed a valid point._ _ _ _

____Sans' shoulders fell. "i know. i feel kind of betrayed. by both of you." He sounded it, too._ _ _ _

____"I know."_ _ _ _

____Silence._ _ _ _

____"I'm sorry."_ _ _ _

____"me, too."_ _ _ _

____"... Do you think we can still... work out?"_ _ _ _

____"i hope so."_ _ _ _

____"... Could you trust me again?"_ _ _ _

____"i think so."_ _ _ _

____"I'm sorry."_ _ _ _

____"me, too."_ _ _ _

____A long, long pause. Specter stood and stretched behind you, soon deciding to march directly between you and Sans as if he was king and you were his subjects._ _ _ _

____"Want to have some coffee and Christmas cookies?"_ _ _ _

____"you read my mind."_ _ _ _

____He gave you one of his usual- if somewhat more tired and not quite as genuine- smiles, and you helped him to his feet while Luka stood and stretched beside you. She followed you both into the kitchen, having heard the word 'cookies' and assuming she would get some._ _ _ _

____She did not. She was not very happy about it._ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing the end, by the way. Any scenarios you want to see, you better drop them in the comments now!


	27. Specter falls in love

Eventually, you and Sans and Papyrus all moved to a new home, together. 

It was bigger, more secluded, with fields on three sides and a wood behind. Just a short walk away was a pond, in which koi fish swam about and ducks raised their kids. Luka loved the pond the moment she laid eyes upon it, immediately jumping in despite your protests that it wasn't even your property and that the people selling the land probably did not want some random persons dog jumping in there pond. It was close to town, close enough that going to work and seeing friends and family was not an issue, and the people selling it were incredibly kind during the whole process.

It was lovely.

The moving part had scared you, but then, it always had. Upon buying the house, you had come to the decision to finally, once and for all, sell your old home, considering it had not been lived in for over two years. Sans, while secretly glad to have it over with once a kind, elderly couple moved in, had been gentle throughout the entire process, even as you had last second doubts about giving up your forget-me-nots.

The first day you had started bringing your boxes into the new home, you found a potted forget-me-not sitting on the front windowsill.

When Sans had noticed you expressing nervousness toward the packed boxes during the first few days, he asked if something was bothering you.

"No, no! Well, yes. But... Not like that. I just... Packing has always made me nervous. Moving. The whole thing. Change, I suppose." You had shrugged, stomach turning over at the all worst case scenarios playing though your head. 

"it'll be alright." Sans had assured you, pressing a toothy kiss to your cheek and making you blush. "nothing we can't handle."

Charlie, Specter and Luka had been of the last 'dire importance' things moved in, right beside beds and boxes of clothes. Charlie could not have cared less, not even when Papyrus walked his tank over to the koi pond and told him that, perhaps, when he was that large, he could move in with his fish brethren! 

You didn't have the heart to tell him that might kill him. 

Luka, of course, immediately took a shine to the place and, after investigating every corner, upstairs and down, even helped you bring boxes inside- Papyrus found that, by tying a rope carefully around smaller boxes, she could very easily carry boxes herself. And she did, with the greatest of prides in her step every time she carried a box up the steps of the house.

Specter, of course, freaked out at first. However, upon waking the second day, you found him stretched out luxuriously in the living room, rolling over in tight little coils, marking the place as fit for his inhabitance. 

As the days went by and Specter was self-establishing his boundaries, you discovered something interesting.

Lifting one box from the moving truck into the house one day, you spotted Specter, outside as was his want. The part that caught your attention, however, was that he was sitting on your neighbor's windowsill, another cat- a long haired calico- on the other side of the glass. Upon putting the box on the porch and wandering over to see what was up, you found he was talking quietly to the other cat in quiet little chirps, and, guessing by the way the other cat's jaws were moving, they were answering him. 

When you returned to the house, picking up your box along the way, you gave Sans a smile as you went in. "You won't believe this, but I think Specter is out trying to make friends with the neighbor's cat."

He raised an eyebrow at you. "really?"

"Yeah, go take a look! They're talking through the window." 

As the days went by and you got settled into the house to the point where you could spend more time inside than moving boxes, you found Specter either waiting for his new cat friend to appear or talking to who you learned was named Ms. Butters. One day, as you stood out there watching Specter attempt to paw at her through the glass, Sans came up beside you and nudged you, wiggling his eyebrows.

"What?"

"i think Spec's got the hots for his princess locked up in the tower." He chuckled, nodding to the scene when you gave him a surprised glance. Specter was now attempting to butt his head against the calico, which was kind of hard considering there was a sheet of glass between them.

"Aw, our little Spectie-Spoo is growing up." You cooed, putting your hands to your cheeks. Luka, apparently sensing the commotion, came up and sat beside you, tongue rolling out and legs muddy. "I think Luka is in love, too, by the way."

"what? with who?"

"That pond down the field." You said drily, wrinkling your nose when Luka tried to jump and give you a kiss. "Luka, no, you're gross! Sans, can you grab the hose for me?" You quickly sidestepped her, then backed up some more as she came at you again. Soon you were racing around the yard, Luka hot on your heels, barking happily. "Sans! Save me!"

"nah, you look like you're having a great time. besides, exercise is good for you." Sans leaned against the porch railing, chuckling to himself.

"Traitor!" You then tripped, effectively face planting in the dirt and giving Luka the chance to jump on you and get her gross muddy paw prints all over you. "No, how could this be?" 

You rolled over, clutching your chest and lifting a hand to the heavens dramatically as Luka gave you a gross dog kiss. "Betrayed not only by my own dog, but my lover all at once? Oh, woe is me! Such agony of betrayal rips my heart! Specter, save yourself before you, too, fall a similar fate!" 

You allowed your arm to fall limp and crumbled to the ground, turning your head to the side as Luka shoved her big, wet nose against your cheek. "Ah, but alas! My only flaw was loving too much!"

Sans loomed above you, chuckling. "i think your only flaw was tripping and falling on your face."

You made a face at him, scowling. "Rude. Help me up, traitorous love of mine." 

With a laugh, he hoisted you to your feet. Luka danced about in circles, tongue lolling out and eyes bright. When Specter left his love to come and investigate the commotion, she promptly got pond water all over by shaking off at that exact moment.

As if mortified to be seen in such a state by his lady love, Specter took off into the house.

You laughed, you and Sans and Luka- who got briefly hosed and toweled off- soon following behind. Relaxing on the couch after having changed into a different shirt, Sans' arm around you while Luka sprawled luxuriously across your lap and Specter dozed beside Charlie's tank, knowing Papyrus would soon be home to make some form of spaghetti or other noodle-based dish, everything felt as it should be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since the last chapter was so bad have another one lol


	28. Luka

My name is Luka, and I am your dog.

You have been my human for years- so many that I never even bothered to keep count. Such things don't worry dogs, you know. Except when we are trying to lay down and have to circle exactly three times to make sure the place we are about to sleep is acceptable (unless it's next to you, of course). You have been my human for as long as I can remember, but I cannot remember you being much happier than when you are around your skeleton, Sans.

He is nice. I like him. He gives me treats and sneaks me food when you're not looking and I always eat it, even when it's green beans or broccoli; I'm sure he is simply mistaken whenever he passes those to me under the table- surely he meant to pass me a bite of meat and grabbed the wrong thing by mistake. He is a nice slumber buddy whenever he is home and you are at work and we are both waiting for you to come home. I like it when he plays fetch with me; somehow, he can always throw the stick the longest distance. 

I can feel that Sans loves you, deep, deep down, somewhere a dog cannot even begin to comprehend. And I can feel that you love him, too. And, I, too love him in a way similar to the way I love you- similar, but different all the same. I'm always happy when I watch you sit together on the couch, laughing and smiling as you get tangled in each other's arms- happy that you are happy, happy that I got you together. 

Dogs always know what is best for their humans, after all.

I also know that you are happy with the other skeleton- Papyrus. He is loud and fun and energetic and will spend hours of time racing with me around the yard and up and down the street and playing fetch with me. He always asks me my opinion on his spaghetti when you aren't allowed to tell him not to give me any. 

I always find it very good.

I know that Specter is very important to you, also. He is calm and mellow and it helps keep you calm, but he also loves to chase the little red light on the floor and try to catch the ball of feathers on the end of the stick, and I can feel how much you love him in those moments. While he is not very practiced in it yet, I think, one day, he will be a lot like me.

All of your friends- Undyne, the one likes to play tug'o'war with me, Alphys, the one who helps me when my leg is acting up, Rob, your brother who loves play the game where he hides a treat somewhere and I have to find it, Toriel, Frisk, Flowey- I can feel that they all make you happy and calm, so I always feel happy and calm when they are around. 

A long time ago, I made it my duty to protect you, even if I couldn't see the threat. Just because I didn't see it didn't mean it wasn't there. You have always been nervous and tense and anxious about things I couldn't understand; humans are far more complex than dogs, after all. I always tried to be there for you. Somehow, it always seemed to help. 

I'm glad. I felt bad whenever I couldn't help you.

I can remember those nights when rain would pour down and thunder would shake the sky and I would be afraid, but you would find me and hold me and sing to me until I was calm again- an old memory, but sharp all the same. I think it was then, during one of those nights, that I decided it was my duty to do the same for you.

You are a very loving human. You are soft and tender and caring and gentle and you have so much room for love and happiness inside of you. It makes me smile and wag my tail whenever I can feel that room inside you fill up with love and affection and adoration for those around you. It makes me love you just as much.

You are my human, after all.

We have done so many things together- played in mud and rain puddles, played fetch in the park, slept side by side on the floor on warm Fall days, gotten water all over each other in the game where you chase me with the hose and shake water all over you (the game called 'Bath'), sat on the sofa as you read from books upon books, slept in big pile in Sans' bed on the nights you feel lonely, sneaked little treats so you could break off little pieces for me, walked down the sidewalk on cool Summer days, just sat, side by side, enjoying each other's company (those are my favorites). 

So many things, in fact, that could not imagine that I could ever be happier than when we do them all over again.

The hairs on my paws and at the end of my nose have long since turned silvery white and shiny. I can see them, whenever my legs hurt so much that I have lie down slowly and focus on my paws, or when I feel enough energy to go down to the pond and can look at my reflection while the ducks paddle about. Coupled with my failing eyesight and fading hearing, I think they are a sign that I am growing old. 

I can feel it inside me, in the little twinges I get in my hind legs when I lie down too fast or move the wrong way, in my shoulder and wrist when I run too quickly, in my lessening appetite and decrease in vigor: I am old. 

I think you know it, too. I can feel the flashes of concern whenever you notice me having a hard time, so I always try to reassure you that I'm fine by wagging my tail and smiling at you. I can feel a dread in you at times, a creeping sadness. And I know why. Not everything lives forever; not even dogs. I can remember when Molly the cat died, and you cried and cried and cried. I could feel your pain, raw and deep, and I knew you missed Molly long after she was gone.

I did, too. I liked Molly.

I can see you, now, a familiar hazy blob in my vision. We are on the floor, and I am lying in front of you as you kneel beside me. Your skeleton is there, too. You are both sad- very, very sad. 

"isn't there anything we can do?" I can hear Sans whisper to you- even with my lousy hearing, I can still catch his words, cracking at the edges.

"Sometimes, things are just meant to be, Sans. Extending her life now would mean her quality of life would just be... nonexistent." You answer, just as quietly. I can feel your hands on my fur and petting my head and I reach up and lick your fingers and feel your sudden pang of sharpened sadness- and I feel bad. Me licking you had always had the opposite affect before.

I think Sans is crying- I can smell his tears. I reach out with my good leg- the one Sans gave me, so long ago, it feels like it happened in another lifetime- and touch his knee. He leans over and nuzzles the side of my face with his own. I wag my tail and give his cheek a lick. He cries harder.

I know what is coming, and I think you both do, too. Not everything lives forever. Not even dogs. 

"We love you, Luka." You both whisper, and I can feel your hands on my fur, smoothing it gently, the way I love to be pet. I wag my tail, even though it's taking a lot of effort to do so now, and lift my head and give you my best smile, even though it is very tiring to do that, too.

You are both crying. I can feel your pain, raw and deep and sharp and real as any knife, any kick, any punch. I wish I knew how to comfort you, but all my usual methods are having the opposite affect; in all these years, the one thing I was never prepared to handle was my own life coming to an end.

I can hear, sung under your breath, the song that I love so, so much:

"You are my sunshine,  
My only sunshine..."

And I wag my tail, very weakly now. Your voice is choked and weak, but I can feel what you are trying to say. You are trying to comfort me, as well as yourself. 

I know you will miss me. I will miss you, too. You are my human. He is my skeleton. Papyrus, Rob, Undyne, Alphys, Frisk and Flowey and Toriel- I will miss them all. I know you will hurt- hurt more even than you are feeling now. But, even as my sense of sight and touch and smell and hearing and taste all begin to ebb and paleness begins to flicker behind my eyelids, even as I hear you whisper how much you love me, how much you'll miss me, all of your goodbyes, even as my life comes to a close, I know that I am satisfied with it and all I was able to do for you, and I know, eventually, you will be okay. I'm leaving you in good hands.

Specter is a good cat.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The End~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These two fics didn't turn out at all like I expected, and, while I'm not particularly happy with this one, I think it is time to say that it has been drawn to a close.
> 
> Thank you, all you of who liked, commented and encouraged me to keep going! You really made it a joy of an experience and I am so, so grateful for every single one of you!


End file.
